A Union City, New Jersey Salvation Army thrift store was struck with damnation Thursday, as a fire destroyed the 10,000 foot maze of second-hand charity 5K t-shirts, Will Durant collections, and copies of Garden State starring Zach Braff and Natalie Portman on DVD, Fox News reports.
“The building and its contents appear to be a total loss,” a Salvation Army soldier told Fox News in a statement, adding “As of this morning, we understand there are no reported injuries. The Union City Fire Department is investigating the cause of the fire and will provide more details as they become available,” details which may or may not include an estimate of the non-value of the Mark Sanchez New York Jets jerseys, cathode ray tube televisions, Ford Mustang-themed Monopoly sets, Von Dutch trucker hats, and hardcover editions of the South Beach Diet now deemed beyond salvation.