On Wednesday Trump lawyer Joe Tacopina submitted a letter to the court ahead of next week’s trial in writer EJ Carroll’s defamation case against the fat former president calling her a liar after she credibly accused him of raping her in a department store in 1995, with Tacopenis asking the judge to specifically instruct the jury not to hold Donald’s lack of full attendance on every day of the proceedings against him given his position as the twice-impeached former president.

“Although Defendant Trump wishes to appear at trial, in order to avoid the burdens outlined above, if he does not do so, we respectfully request that the Court issue to the jury the following preliminary instruction: ‘While no litigant is required to appear at a civil trial, the absence of the defendant in this matter, by design, avoids the logistical burdens that his presence, as the former president, would cause the courthouse and New York City. Accordingly, his presence is excused unless and until he is called by either party to testify,'” Tacopina wrote in the request to SDNY Judge Lewis Kaplan.

EJ Carroll’s lawyer Roberta Kaplan (no relation) responded with the respect the bullshit request deserved. “Mr Trump’s position is especially difficult to credit in light of his own recent activity. Over the past few weeks, Mr Trump attended the Ultimate Fighting Championship 287 event, spoke at the National Rifle Association’s annual meeting, and appeared for a deposition in the New York Attorney General’s civil case against Mr Trump, his adult children, and the Trump Organization. On Monday, he announced that he has scheduled a New Hampshire campaign event for next Thursday, April 27 – in other words, in the middle of the trial in this case. If Mr Trump can find a way to attend wrestling championships, political conventions, civil depositions, and campaign functions, then surely he could surmount the logistics of attending his own federal trial,” wrote Kaplan in her response.

Keep in mind she isn’t arguing that Trump be required to be present for every day of proceedings in the trial, but against the judge instructing the jury to give him a pass for not showing up.