Spandex-wearing grapple freak Congressman Jim Jordan tells shitty malware site the Daily Mail he’s got three FBI “whistleblowers” who he’s pretty sure won’t go missing in the next 72 hours and will actually show up to a hearing of his lame “Weaponization” select subcommittee on Thursday.

Fired former FBI agents Garret O’Boyle and Steve Friend, former FBI State Operations Specialist Marcus Allen, and some douchebag activist from “Empower Oversight” named Tristian Leavitt.

O’Boyle’s Substack blog, “Last Line Substack – Musings of a Congressional whistleblower” is locked and you need to be approved by him to read it. Friend claims he was temporarily reassigned to track down January 6th suspects instead of working on a joint task force to track down child pornography suspects. His upcoming memoir, “True Blue: My Journey from Beat Cop to Suspended FBI Whistleblower” hits bookstores next month, so we’re sure the timing is just a coincidence.

Allen was suspended last year and notified in a letter from the FBI saying “The Security Division has learned you have espoused conspiratorial views both orally and in writing and promoted unreliable information which indicates support for the events of January 6th. These allegations raise sufficient concerns about your allegiance to the United States and your judgment to warrant a suspension of your clearance pending further investigation,” and is currently suing with the help of fascist MAGA legal organization Judicial Watch, helmed by demented meathead non-lawyer Tom Fitton.

Leavitt is a former staffer for Senator Charles Grassley who is suing the FEC for withholding documents about some conspiracy against the crypto industry, lol. So this ought to be a fun hearing and we look forward to Stacey Plaskett, Debbie Wasserman-Schultz, and Dan Goldman’s lively exchanges with this ragtag group of anti-Deep State heroes – if they aren’t “disappeared” first.