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Wiener loving goes woke

Americans who love putting a big fat wiener in their mouths are going to have to watch out for the woke ones now as Oscar Meyer on Wednesday announced new “NotHotDogs and NotSausages, the first ever plant-based Oscar Mayer offerings and the first plant-based meat innovation from the joint venture between The Kraft Heinz Company (‘Kraft Heinz’) and TheNotCompany, Inc (‘NotCo’).”

“With its mission to create mouthwatering plant-based foods for all, The Kraft Heinz Not Company’s Oscar Mayer NotHotDogs and NotSausages offer the savory and smoky experience that brand fans have known and loved for more than 140 years. The United States plant-based market is projected to skyrocket from $8.3 billion in 2023 to $19 billion by 2030. However, plant-based hot dogs and dinner sausage links remain underdeveloped and under-consumed within the broader plant-based meat category, largely due to disappointment in existing offerings’ taste and texture.”

“With Oscar Mayer NotHotDogs and NotSausages – available in Bratwurst and Italian sausage flavors – The Kraft Heinz Not Company aims to deliver on these needs and consumers’ evolving preference in the plant-based space,” the woke wieners continued in their press release.

Also “NotDogs” was right freaking there. Why the hell does it need an extra syllable?

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