Categories
Uncategorized

Team Orange begging client to shut the fuck up during trial

Knowing that failing to do so could have serious consequences both legal and political, former President Trump’s shitbag lawyers and minions have been pleading with the Obese Orange God Emperor to keep his mouth shut and behave during his upcoming trial in Manhattan over his interfering in the 2016 election by paying hush money to pornstar Stormy Daniels, with whom he’d had a 45 second sexual encounter over a decade earlier, sources tell Rolling Stone.

So delicate is the situation that the lawyers freaked out when an outside adviser told Donald not to testify in the trial to avoid upsetting the jury because the fat bastard would defiantly do the opposite, and the teams is desperate to “prevent him from talking his way into a mess.”

“Nobody from President Trump’s team has advised what is alleged and the legal team does not share these absurd views peddled by cowardly unnamed sources. We won’t litigate this case in the media and those who try [to] do so clearly are speaking from ignorance and stupidity,” said large-headed Trump Campaign spokesman Steven Cheung in a typically rage-filled statement.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Jesse Watters struggles against noncompliant interview subject

28 minutes ago

Supreme Court allows Trump crackdown on mail-in voting

4 hours ago

Orange Baby threatens Canada some more

7 hours ago

Wait for the punchline

7 hours ago

Comer marvels at investigative target’s ability to evade his scrutiny

8 hours ago

California AG cancels settlement talks meeting with Paramount

11 hours ago

“IRAN IS COMPLETELY COLLAPSING!!!”

12 hours ago

John Solomon reports other guys high on hopium

15 hours ago

CBP arrests USS Abraham Lincoln sailor’s dad

17 hours ago

Log cabin burns to the ground

1 day ago

“The Biden Administration is over!”

1 day ago

Louisiana ICE agent arrested for breaking into ex’s home

1 day ago

Jared Kushner pleads for preemptive mercy from Jeffries

2 days ago

Flock CEO details the human side of a mass surveillance state

2 days ago

ChiComs making you hate data centers: New Big Tech PR message

2 days ago

Trump interrupted by heckler at cult speech

3 days ago

RNC chair blames Biden for abysmal Trump approval ratings

3 days ago

Supreme Court allows work to continue on Trump ballroom

3 days ago

Don Jr-backed “anti-woke marketplace” PublicSquare collapses

3 days ago

“As everyone knows, under President Biden…”

4 days ago

Breitbart reports socialist on slippery slope to full-blown Marxism

4 days ago

Natalie Harp’s creepy, obsessive letters to Trump leak to Daily Beast

4 days ago

Navy to rename carrier USS Doris Miller to USS Donald Trump: CNN

4 days ago

Smarmy MAGA Congressman says Trump pussied out vs Iran

4 days ago

Undercover ICE agent dropped recording device at church

4 days ago

FBI agents seize Swalwell’s devices, raid house

4 days ago

WSJ declares Bonesaw’s insane future city project DOA

4 days ago

Republicans urge Big Tech to improve data centers’ image

5 days ago

“Toughest president ever” announces “ECONOMIC D-DAY”

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Marie Antionette gushes over his Versailles

5 days ago

Orange God Emperor retroactively undorses Cory Mills

5 days ago

Byron Dork butthurt as “dirty trick” works out well so far

5 days ago

Madison Cawthorn gets 8.5 percent in FL-19 primary

6 days ago

Cory Mills loses primary

6 days ago

BREAKING: Fox News admits they lied to viewers about gas prices

6 days ago

California MAGA county clerk to hire Tina Peters as top deputy

6 days ago

“Peace president” gives up on peace talks

6 days ago

Fox News excited to hype launch of new mental poison for kids

6 days ago

ABC files First Amendment lawsuit against FCC

7 days ago

Orange Tyrant still really nervous over Dan Sullivan “hoax”

7 days ago

Frau Ingraham badmouths men who wear makeup

1 week ago

Pete Hegseth visits battlefield to try to help boost morale

1 week ago

President embarrasses nation because it’s a day that ends in Y

1 week ago

Texas MAGA Congressman says suffering American sailors full of shit

1 week ago

Supreme Court spikes Trump’s bid for EJ Carroll rehearing

1 week ago

Orange Fuhrer vows to “bomb the shit out of” US ally Oman

1 week ago

AP reports Trump-Iran 60-day “ceasefire” expires on Monday, lol

1 week ago

“This is real… He hasn’t brought anything down”

1 week ago

Israel relying on AI chatbots to help polish its image

1 week ago

Show us on the doll where the Shannon Bream woked you

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x