Well we screwed up again at one of our “bold” predictions. On Friday we wrote that MAGAverse’s line on Texas Dem Congressman Henry Cuellar’s indictment for taking bribes from some Azerbaijani scumbags would be that “the Deep State sometimes goes after sacrificial lambs like Cuellar and Bob Menendez to make their ‘persecutions’ of Donald Trump seem more legitimate.” Now it’s clear that was a failure of imagination, as the actual line is that this is retaliation for Cuellar being a border hawk. Should’ve seen it coming after a similar line developed last year when Eric Adams’s phones got seized. This isn’t going to be all that long given the level of repetitiveness and overlap.
“Cuellar has been very outspoken against the Biden Administration and its immigration policies. Henry has had plenty of time to change his rhetoric but refuse to do so and now the Biden Administration is going to take him down” – Top comment on Fox News’s article.
“Henry Cuellar (D-TX) is one the very few Democrats who is in favor of illegal immigration restrictions. He’s from the Rio Grande Valley and knows his constituents want the border under control. To me, here in Texas, it looks like the administration trying to get rid of him. Show me the man, etc” – Top comment on Twitchy’s article. You were warned these were repetitive.
“Notice that whenever a democrat strays from the party line, he gets indicted” – Top comment on Breitbart’s article. Note that Cuellar had been under investigation for at least two years, long before the “border crisis” was amped up to an 11 by the MAGA propaganda machine a few months ago.
Mayor Adams of NY received the message first.
Now Rep. Cuellar did, too.
You speak out against their immigration and border policies.
You are going down.
— George Papadopoulos (@GeorgePapa19) May 3, 2024
“Revenge for his pro-life and border security postions. The new Dem go to is indict all threats” – Top comment on RedState’s article. Forgot about Cuellar being a “pro-life” Democrat too.
“Cuellar for Republican Party” – Top comment on the Right Scoop’s article. We could be wrong but it sure seems like the commenter is suggesting Cuellar should switch parties as an act of defiance against the Deep State and the Dems, which says quite a lot and nothing good about how your average MAGA voter thinks in terms of integrity expected of elected members of Congress.
The Biden Justice Department only indicts easily replaceable Democrats—including Bob Menendez and Henry Cuellar—who don’t fall in line with Biden.
If the Biden DOJ actually cared about foreign bribery, the Biden family would be in prison right now. https://t.co/u3J2FuumFD
— 🇺🇸 Mike Davis 🇺🇸 (@mrddmia) May 3, 2024
“Not that I believe he is innocent, it’s just that I feel many more are guilty. But it is selective enforcement. Biden’s DOJ is very picky about those they pursue” – Top comment on the Gateway Pundit’s article, headlined “BREAKING: Texas Democrat Rep Who Blasted Biden Over Border Crisis Indicted on Federal Bribery, Money Laundering Charges,” lest there be any doubt on whether they wanted their readers to come to that conclusion themselves. Still this asshole manages to take the nihilism a step even further with the old “They’re all corrupt anyway, but this guy was targeted” line.
“Interesting, isn’t it, that Cuellar is against illegal immigration, and he’s being indicted on federal charges, yet Bob Menendez, who supports the Biden administration’s policies, is not?” – Top comment on Townhall’s article. Holy fucking shit this comment has 42 upvotes when not only has Menendez been indicted but while we are less than 48 hours away from going on trial for we forget how many goddamned major federal felonies but bribery is definitely the main focus. Like we knew the assclowns that frequent these sites were uninformed but to see it so plainly is kind of jarring.
“Payback for criticizing Biden on the border. Imagine that – Cuellar gets accused and arrested for a fraction of the exact same thing that Biden has been doing for decades. No DoJ corruption here folks, move along” – Top comment on the Daily Caller’s article. We forgot the “This is nothing compared to Biden” line too. Of course this chickendick doesn’t acknowledge James Comer’s failures as doing so would ruin the fun of swimming around in one’s own misinformation pool.
BREAKING: US DOJ indicts Congressman Henry Cuellar and his wife Imelda for allegedly accepting bribes of at least $598,000 from two foreign entities.
The entities involved are an Azerbaijani state-controlled oil and gas company and a bank based in Mexico City.
The DOJ claims… pic.twitter.com/ttvwgsO9Fr
— KanekoaTheGreat (@KanekoaTheGreat) May 3, 2024
Top MAGA influencer “Kanekoa” failed in his imagination too… Until some assclown reminded him:
Interesting
— KanekoaTheGreat (@KanekoaTheGreat) May 3, 2024
Which we guess makes Cuellar a “white hat” in QAnon parlance.
Anyway as we’ve seen over the past year that when a Democrat like Cuellar, Adams, and Menendez (some assholes claimed that was retaliation for Gold Bars Bob being “tough” on Iran) it’s (mostly) no longer that they’re all corrupt, but that the whole criminal justice system is illegitimate and politically motivated because… Well you already figured out who they’re trying to protect. It’s not like we were “wrong” in saying it’s all an “op” to debunk the “two-tier justice system” it’s just the fanboys need to throw in some factual-ish basis for that. It’s all toward the same goal though: Getting the most corrupt and orange of them all returned to power. What are a few crackerjacks like Menendez, Adams, and Cuellar taking cash from foreign scumbags if denying the truth of their criminality (or minimizing it) makes it easier to resurrect their Holy Pornstar-Fucking Messiah’s presidency?