“A Somerset, Kentucky, man, Jesse Kipf, 39, was sentenced to 81 months on Monday by US District Judge Robert Wier, for computer fraud and aggravated identity theft. According to his plea agreement, Kipf intentionally accessed a computer without authorization and then obtained information from a protected computer for his own private gain and in furtherance of identity theft.”

“Specifically, in January 2023, Kipf accessed the Hawaii Death Registry System, using the username and password of a physician living in another state, and created a “case” for his own death. Kipf then completed a State of Hawaii Death Certificate Worksheet, assigned himself as the medical certifier for the case and certified his death, using the digital signature of the doctor. This resulted in Kipf being registered as a deceased person in many government databases. Kipf admitted that he faked his own death, in part, to avoid his outstanding child support obligations.”

“Kipf also infiltrated other states’ death registry systems, private business networks, and governmental and corporate networks using credentials he stole from real people. He then tried to sell access to these networks to potential buyers on the dark net, an overlay network within the internet that can only be accessed with specific software, configurations, or authorization and is commonly associated with the sale of illicit goods and services,” says a DOJ press release.

Well that’s certainly a waste of talent if we ever saw one. A particularly reprehensible one at that too. All that creativity and ingenuity just to fuck over his own kid(s). If he was this good at cybercrime then why not maybe just pay it off quietly and then buy them a lot of nice shit too?