Categories
Uncategorized

Orange Lord showers his golden glory upon replacement for Gaetz

“Jimmy Patronis, Chief Financial Officer for the Great State of Florida, has done a tremendous job as CFO, where he also serves as the State’s Fire Marshall, and as an important member of the Florida Cabinet. I hear that Jimmy is now considering launching a Campaign for Congress in Florida’s 1st Congressional District! A fourth generation Floridian from the beautiful Panhandle, and [blah blah blah]… Should he decide to enter this Race, Jimmy Patronis has my Complete and Total Endorsement. RUN, JIMMY, RUN!” posted convicted felon President-Elect Trump on Monday.

What did Patronis do to earn this coveted honor? Our guess is when he announced he wanted to set up a fund that would cover Trump’s legal bills with taxpayer money. That probably did it.

UPDATE 11/25/2024 1:09 PM EST: Patronis accepted, tweeting “Put me to work, Mr President! I am ready to serve,” thus for a long time, probably forever, closing the door on a Gaetz comeback.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Artemis II crew splashes down safely

11 hours ago

Eric Swalwell needs to resign from Congress right fucking now

11 hours ago

Orange Shitbag pledges to help Hungarians before Americans

14 hours ago

BREAKING: Trump regime admits they lied

16 hours ago

Raskin asks White House doc to conduct thorough mental eval

16 hours ago

Fox News reports lib terrorist targeted pro-Trump patriot

17 hours ago

Kamala Harris says she’s “thinking about” a 2028 run

18 hours ago

Trump continues to whine about the consequences of his fuckup

18 hours ago

Houston gentlemen’s club patron felled in dispute with rogues

19 hours ago

Pete Buttigieg nearly causes MAGA CNBC host to stroke out

20 hours ago

President promotes evil corporation run by eccentric supervillains

20 hours ago

Consumer sentiment index sinks to lowest level ever

21 hours ago

New York Times called out for its terrible polling numbers

21 hours ago

Russian defense official gets 19 years for unsanctioned graft

22 hours ago

MAGAflation skyrockets to 3.3 percent in March

23 hours ago

Top Melania aide says Third Lady focused media on her Epstein ties because media isn’t focused on her performative “achievements”

23 hours ago

Massie leads generic MAGA douche primary challenger: poll

1 day ago

Texas Lt Gov Dannie Goeb worried state House could flip to Dems

1 day ago

Fox Business reports bribery refusal investigation underway

1 day ago

Orange Karen complains about quality of Iranian oil transit service

2 days ago

Donald denies knowing what prompted Melania’s Epstein denial

2 days ago

You can find avant garde art in anything, really

2 days ago

BREAKING: New York City schools still closed for Spring break

2 days ago

When Marjorie Taylor Greene says you’re a mentally ill sociopath…

2 days ago

White House accepts $37 million in proudly non-American-made steel for ballroom to host majestic, blue-collar-excluding galas

2 days ago

This is why Karoline earns your big bucks

2 days ago

Netanyahu’s corruption trial resumes

2 days ago

California Supreme Court orders MAGA sheriff to halt ballot probe

2 days ago

Frau Ingraham could’ve just called the Times story fake news

2 days ago

“REMEMBER GREENLAND” now a heroic rallying cry for patriots

2 days ago

FDA recalls male enhancement chocolates

3 days ago

Soldier’s wife released as ICE melts under public heat once again

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Karoline Kringefest

3 days ago

Strait of Hormuz as open as the Kennedy Center

3 days ago

Fat toddler complains reports are wrong, doesn’t correct them

3 days ago

“Middle class white kids” most discriminated against in schools: JD

3 days ago

Regime declares Bondi doesn’t have to be deposed

3 days ago

Orange Mark got conned into war by two-bit hustler “Bibi”: NYT

3 days ago

Still sucks to be Florida MAGA Quebecois-American motelier

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Sad Pete

3 days ago

Dem flips Wisconsin Supreme Court seat

3 days ago

TACOpocalypse now

4 days ago

JP Morgan predicts $5/gallon gas this month

4 days ago

Regime pays Deutsche Bank $145 million for $92 million property

4 days ago

Florida woman accidentally rescues wanted murderer from waves

4 days ago

When RonAnon is the Congressional GOP’s moral center…

4 days ago

Vietnam elects communist party swamp creature to presidency

4 days ago

Former reality show host still knows how to hype big new episode

4 days ago

Jaydee crushes it at Orban rally in key EU swing state Hungary

4 days ago

Process (war) crimes

4 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x