“ALERT: All purchases of Iranian Oil, or Petrochemical products, must stop, NOW! Any Country or person who buys ANY AMOUNT of OIL or PETROCHEMICALS from Iran will be subject to, immediately, Secondary Sanctions. They will not be allowed to do business with the United States in any way, shape, or form. Thank you for your attention to this matter,” posted TACO man on May 1st.

That’s not what was in the headline, but follow along here: Back in November prosecutors in the Eastern District of New York hit Indian billionaire Gautam Adani and seven of his minions with “with conspiracies to commit securities and wire fraud and substantive securities fraud for their roles in a multi-billion-dollar scheme to obtain funds from US investors and global financial institutions on the basis of false and misleading statements.” Then on May 15th, Bloomberg printed about the least surprising headline: “Adani Camp Meets Trump Officials in Push to End US Bribery Cases,” that “push” almost certainly just being more bribery. Bloomberg’s sources said Team Adani was hoping to have this little unpleasantry cast aside in as little as a month, or however long it took the Orange Shiva to come up with a number on how much $TRUMP shitcoin he wanted Adani to buy.

Whatever it was, that price has had to have gone up substantially, as the Wall Street Journal now reports that prosecutors are looking into whether Adani did like fucking EXACTLY, LITERALLY what Trump said not to do in his Truth Social post by accepting deliveries of Iranian liquefied natural gas at a port he owns in Mumbai. And it’s not just federal prosecutors talking about this on background, but the Journal themselves looked at shipping patterns by vessels traveling back and forth between the Persian Gulf and Adani’s docks and found that “their behavior often exhibited traits seen by ships seeking to evade sanctions.” Gautam better load up on some NFTs and “RUMP” watches too.