Jim Jordan wrestles with being reminded he has constituents

How come we’re not getting funny Jim Jordan in this interview?

So how many masks are we supposed to wear while waiting in line to buy gas?

— Rep. Jim Jordan (@Jim_Jordan) May 13, 2021

Where’s the witty, jocular version of the spandex-wearing grapple-freak we had all this years ago?

Jim Jordan wrestles with being reminded he has constituents

US aircraft patriotically collide over Iraqi airspace

Wing Guru founder not exactly a tax evasion guru

Dow closes only down 740 points on the day, oil not at $100 yet

WATCH LIVE: Violent sex pest and enabler celebrate womanhood

Jerome Powell slump hits stock market, Trump demands action

Michigan Jewish school under active shooter threat

QAdulteress either launching weekly podcast or violent coup d’etat

Ayatollah’s message flops on Wall Street

IDF drops charges against troops taped gang-sodomizing POW

White House rips Biden for tapping reserves before 2022 midterms

New Ayatollah lays out visionary energy policy in first address

“Mean tweets and cheap gas” now just “Expensive oil is MAGA”

Frau Ingraham forgets to find way to blame Biden or Obama

Explodey Iranian boats kaboom more not-Iranian boats

Heavenly wonder of God’s creation to flourish in Bible belt

Fox News reports top strategic presidential income source valiantly standing strong thanks to US taxpayer-funded defense array

Rapist endorses accused rapist

Oil above $90 after surging to $100 overnight

Ted Cruz pre-blames Biden for terror attack, just to be safe

Top expert on “Black People” identifies target of their anger

Republican Florida man busted in massive vegetable trafficking ring

Pax Corny-Drama

California feds and cops say Iranian drone threat “not actionable”

Con artist wanted for defrauding local payday loan business

“We’ve got a little hiccup with some of the Latino voters for certain”

WATCH LIVE: Orange Maoist commands peasant worker adulation

Texas bomb shelter company CEO says business booming

FBI warns Iranian drones might maybe possibly attack West Coast

WATCH LIVE: Senescent old shitbag mumbles to media

Brown 47 – Husted 45 in Ohio: GOP pollster

Justice Department investigating Iranian transactions by company owned by crypto money laundering Trump partner/pardonee

Joe Rogan magically an uniformed shitbrain again, per Mark Levin

Surplus Budweiser clydesdale turned Providence cop’s watch ends

“They’ve been careful not to express that directly to the president”

Reptilian humanoid seems to want to tell CNN to secure Hormuz

Iowa man had been under the impression that Trump would tell the gasoline pumps to be his always happy, super-nice friends again

“Democrats have major problems, too”

Senator Fanboy needs new “Stop the Steal” material

Pam Bondi moves to DC-area military base

Andrew no longer has Middle East “escape hatch”

He was talking about all those other poor people, MAGA voters

South Dakota super-bans Don Lemonist terror attacks on churches

“Seems like some people are rooting for high gas prices”

Orange Karen warns the Iran manager against any funny business

Fishing fest fuckery foiled

WATCH LIVE: Operation Karoline Fury

Only “TRUMP” CAN eradicate invasive Asian fish from Great Lakes

Energy Suckretary deletes tweet claiming Hormuz tanker escort

“Fact Check: Photos of Bill Clinton with Stephen Hawking in princess costume aren’t real. We have the proof”: Snopes headline