Mark Kelly wins reelection in Arizona

Dem Senator Mark Kelly has defeated Reptilian humanoid Blake Masters and won a full term to the US Senate in Arizona, Cook Political Report’s Dave Wasserman projects based on outstanding vote.

More than half of Daily Wire staff laid off

Orange Allah anoints McConnell successor

The Villages hosts their idiot: Live Video

Fourteen IRGC troops dead from an “explosion of bomb remnants”

Pew pollsters pew-pew presidential-proval

WATCH LIVE-ish: Grandpa rambles to reporters aimlessly

Camp Mystic not reopening this summer

The Spirit of ’26: WSJ reports airline dead after Trump rug pull

Self-backed into a corner, Buddy Carter blames gas prices on Dems

Louisiana Dem sues to block Landry gerrymander speedrun

Whistleblower says what you already guessed about SPLC case

“Lib terrorists did it” trending in unfurnished basements nationwide

Iranians digging into missile reserves more literally than you think

Kemp not trying to redraw Georgia map before November

RonAnon encourages fans to make their vote count in mentally ill colleague’s non-binding Twitter poll that bots can click yes on

Todd Blanche dusted off “8647” case to earn formal AG nod

FEMA rehires 14 signatories of “Katrina declaration”

Scott Jennings snaps “get your fucking hand out of my face”

DOGEcels exposed healthcare providers’ Social Security numbers

WATCH LIVE: Faithful disciples surround Orange Jesus with love

Stereotypical boomer hell bent on pulling the ladder up behind him

White collar criminal brimming with tiresome personal insecurities

Large animatronic dinosaur fire claims large animatronic dinosaur

Orange Felon pulls plug on shitbrained quack surgeon general pick

WATCH LIVE: Drunken Fox News washout suffers more indignities

Big Rotisserie subverts democracy

President declares the American people “angry” with “seriously unfunny” Jimmy Kimmel, stresses urgency for ABC to fire him

Maine Gov Janet Mills drops Senate campaign

Steve Scalise’s gas price narrative could use some work

Scientology rages at Xenu cultists “speedrunning” into sanctums

White House ballroom approval stuck at 28 percent: poll

Fox News reports foreign disinformation campaigns bad for public

LIV Golf to be sawed up into tiny pieces

Powell to stay on Fed Board until he decides to quit

Galactic space commander fetes lowly underlings: Watch Live

Superman: The Ride suffers diminution and leveling of breakdown

Orange Sun Tzu says his Iran naval blockade better than bombing

Jim Jordan wrestles with being informed in real time that he just admitted Comey case is politically-motivated retribution

Luna, Hageman, and Biggs sink House GOP voting agenda

Supreme Court rules 6-3 for MAGA in racial redistricting case

WATCH LIVE: Sub-competent dipshit Pete Hegseth vs Congress

House Oversight says Bondi to testify next month

“The most powerful person to ever live”

Fuck your feelings statistical data that contradicts my feelings

No perp walk expected for Comey

Indiana Dem arrested for Don Jr style campaigning

Mental child evidently threatening mass shooting in Iran

South Korean court tacks seven years onto Yoon’s life bid

Whataboutism worked into official federal communications

Jonathan Ross back on the job in another state