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Some libs really suck at this

This failed 2022 Republican Tennessee US House primary candidate and right wing influencer might as well just throw this out there on a Saturday night, 40 minutes after TMZ first reported that Friends star Matthew Perry had drowned in his hot tub, right? It’s not like he’s actually trying to convince anyone outside the MAGAverse of the dangers of the COVID-19 vax so much as capitalize on a public figure’s death to “go viral” within his disinformation ecosystem. He probably got a shit ton of new followers for this post by connecting Perry’s pro-vax stance to his death telling those already open to such messaging what they wanted to hear. All the outrage and disgust from the mainstream serves only to increase his street cred among his fellow conservative douchebags.

This is the reaction he wanted. Hook, line, and sinker. Just calling it “despicable” and leaving it at that. Dumber than expecting shame from the shameless, that response is like bringing a hockey stick to a baseball diamond. Demanding the sick asshole play by the rules of morality when he’s playing with “facts” is exactly how you get “owned” with more of these “facts.”

Here are the actual facts: Matthew Perry has struggled with addiction for decades, the result of a seemingly paradoxical combination of a mostly failed career and a shit ton of money. Perry starred in no less than three different sitcoms that were canceled and forgotten after Friends ended in 2004 – only one of which lasted longer than a single season – plus Studio 60 on The Sunset Strip an NBC “dramedy” created by supreme self-cocksucker Aaron Sorkin about a fictionalized Saturday Night Live clone (which, funny enough, premiered the same year as the conceptually similar and far more successful comedy 30 Rock. Also on NBC, as if SNL wasn’t already circlejerky enough on its own).

Despite the lack of steady work, Perry was reportedly worth over $120 million. For comparison’s sake, actually successful and prolific movie star Jake Gyllenhaal is estimated to be worth about $80 million. The disparity is solely the result of rerun syndication deals for Friends on broadcast TV and streaming services which paid Perry and his co-stars handsomely every time a new one was signed.

So while the ivermectin fanboys are “just asking questions” here, how about we just ask a few of our own? What the hell usually happens when a guy who’s publicly known to have struggled with addiction issues has way too much money and way too little to do with his time? Could it be possible that if Perry’s opioid addiction was so bad that in 2018 he was in a coma for two weeks and hospitalized for five months because his colon ruptured (yeah, you read that right) that maybe, just maybe, his heart had also been severely damaged from abusing oxycontin or God knows what else?

Of course it’s despicable and yet another sign of the debasement of Twitter for Starfuck to use the guy’s death to further his own agenda. But in what fucking universe is that supposed to be enough here? It should’ve been clear enough that the clock was ticking on Perry quite rapidly if, and apologies for this detail, he had to wear a colostomy bag because he had pumped so much opioids in his system and thus constipated himself so badly it completely destroyed his colon two years before COVID was even a thing. Starfuck “did his own research” so he could use Perry’s death to “challenge the narrative” in under an hour. The libs who replied could’ve challenged his and didn’t.

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