Netanyahu just going to seize 70 percent of Gaza

Not content to have spilled enough blood, Israeli dictator Benjamin Netanyahu on Thursday announced a new initiative to have the IDF seize control of 70 percent of Gaza, Sky News reports.

None should expect convicted felon President Trump to subtract it from the wars he’s “settled,” however, since that running total was made up in his own head in the first place.

Federal judge temporarily halts Trump’s $1.776 billion slush fund

Wizened elder shares Aesopian fable to self-soothe

Condition of four climbers who fell off Denali “unknown”

Next GOP reconciliation bill on verge of total collapse

John Solomon reports Todd Blanche a scared little pussy

Netanyahu just going to seize 70 percent of Gaza

Milli Vanilli cancel performance at Regime’s 250th celebration fair

WATCH LIVE: Scott Bessent fills in for Krazy Karoline

White House claims “tentative 60-day agreement” with Iran: CBS

Democrat appropriates Republican style for attack ad

“FanimeCon” breakout sesh’s sexy cosplayer “feet juice” sold well

Regime Treasury working out how to illegally mint $250 Trump bill

Rich McCormick thinks Iran interfering in midterms by not surrendering and allowing Trump to declare total victory

MAGAflation hits 3.3 percent in April, Q1 GDP revised down to +1.3

Rasmussen fucks up, finds Dems up 47 to 41 on generic ballot

Breitbart commits necrophilia on irony’s corpse

Trump neglected to visit with troops wounded in Iran war

Regime DOJ investigating EJ Carroll

But the buffalo isn’t even orange

Thune has “productive phone call” with Ken Paxton

Michigan summer camp to raze already denamed “Epstein Lodge”

New York Dems setting up for 2028 redistricting

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor holds retinue captive for hours

Indiana judge allows Joey Chestnut to leave state for NYC contest

Burger King to stamp regnal seal upon chicken nugget marque

“Toward the end of the summer, early fall…”

Tehran says Trump Regime memo offers withdrawal from Strait

Russian Duma allows central banks to set up own drone defenses

Ted Cruz, now and then

John Cornyn and allies spent $92 million to lose by 27.6 percent

Military pew-pews yet another “drug boat” in Pacific

Cornhole nearly breaks down before vowing to support Paxton

Ken Paxton defeats John Cornyn in Texas Senate runoff

K$H fires analyst who didn’t label 2017 Scalise shooting terrorism

Multiple deaths reported in Washington State paper mill implosion

Maine Secretary of State blocks anti-trans ballot measure

WATCH LIVE: NASA holds Lunar base press conference

Canadian doctor disciplined for driving patient he met up with in a Tim Horton’s parking lot to get euthanized at local morgue

Supreme Leader informs populace of his PERFECT health condition

“President Trump’s regime, um, his administration”

Comey trial pushed back to October

Federal court blocks Alabama 2026 gerrymander

US-Saudi venture seeks to replicate Iranian Shahed drones

Dog shoots innocent bystander

Let’s see how our president is doing this morning…

US bombs Iran again “during the ongoing ceasefire”

Old Man Trump telling tall tales to his willing fools again

Bloated corpse to be examined by doctors once again

Breitbart reports it’s pathetic when a Democrat says the same thing

Surrender spun as victory