Up to five inches of snow were forecast for New York City late Thursday into Friday as Winter Storm Marjorie* prepares to spread its icy negativity over the northeast, WNBC reports. The frigid, angry bitch of a storm could cause icing of roadways and business closures on its path to making sure every inch of the land is white and pure, just as God intended it to be.
*Like The Weather Channel does of its own initiative for no discernible purpose whatsoever, National Zero’s editors refer to winter storms by non-canonical names, and in the interest of making things even more confusing and pointless, National Zero’s winter storm names are different than those of The Weather Channel and will not be assigned in alphabetical order.