Vindictive right wing billionaire Peter Thiel, a man full of nothing but malice and contempt for regular folk and their stupid democracy, is backing a new Conservative-themed dating app called “The Right Stuff”, founded by douchebag Trump minion Johnny McEntee, Axios reports. “The Right Stuff” will first launch its beta in Washington, DC on an invite-only basis, meaning the initial user base will probably be 100 to 200 Caucasian men, all 35 or older with a certain jaw shape who work for GOP-aligned organizations and 2,000 or so women in their early 20s who don’t follow politics.

Then once membership opens up nationally those women will delete their profiles after getting dozens of dick pics per day from Steve Bannon podcast listeners who will then complain that the app sucks because they can never get a date on it. By then McEntee and Thiel will have produced a phone book-sized valuation report full of completely made up user data statistics to scam some Arab investor into buying it from them for $2 billion or so. Then the investor lets it slide because Thiel brokers a meeting with Republican Senators who send the investor home with enough Hellfire missiles to turn Iran into a crater, for which the investor’s Emir appoints him Deputy Minister of Transportation for Contractor Bribe Collections. Everyone’s happy except for the dumbass incels who sign up for the Right Stuff thinking they’re going to finally get laid.