Holy fuck he sounds terrible. This is going to go just great.
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Best to go in a straight line here so there’s no confusion about the timeline: Florida Capitol rioter Andrew Paul Johnson was not arrested on charges for crimes committed during the insurrection until October 2022, none violent though he did threaten Capitol police. He then in April 2024 pleaded guilty to four counts and in August of that year was sentenced to a year in the joint.
That federal prison bid, as you’re all-too aware, was cut short by Johnson’s Holy Orange Allah’s return to power and subsequent mass amnesty for Johnson and his ilk. It was during that pre-plea stretch in 2024 however, that Johnson sexually molested at least two minors, one of them a then-11 year-old boy. Following his release last year, Johnson contacted at least one of the victims to let him know about the pardon, and he was being awarded $10 million as a result of being a ‘Jan 6er'” and would “be putting (the victim) in his will to take any money left over,” according to a police affidavit.
Obviously that $10 million never materialized, never will, and even if the kid believed Johnson he obviously didn’t think a bequeathment upon the MAGA pederast’s death was soon enough to buy his silence, so yeah, here we are. CBS News reports Johnson goes on trial next month on faces charges of lewd and lascivious child molestation of a child under 12, lewd and lascivious child molestation of a child between 12 and 16, as well as lewd and lascivious exhibition, and transmission of material harmful to a minor. It’s not clear if prosecutors are seeking the death penalty, which is an option.
The point of laying out the timeline was to clarify that Johnson’s vile crimes were committed prior to his 2025 post-pardon release. He also would have been out of the federal lockup by now anyway had Trump not issued the general amnesty to his loyal fanatic insurrectionists. You can say 100 percent accurately say “Trump pardoned a child molester!” but to assign blame to fat Donald for kids being victimized by a sexual predator is simply incorrect… for now. In this specific case.
A new survey of Alaska voters commissioned by the Democratic Senate Campaign Committee finds Dem former Congresswoman Mary Peltola leading GOP Senator Dan Sullivan 49 to 47 percent.
Peltola also edges out Sullivan on favorability at +4 to Sullivan’s negative 5. Normally you can and probably should take a partisan poll by an actual arm of a party with a grain of salt. At the same time, if it were a shitty result they wouldn’t have leaked it. There’s also the other findings, like that convicted felon president Trump has a net +2 approval rating at 49 to 47 in the sample, who in 2024 voted for him 50 to 40 percent, a delta close to his 11 percent margin in the state that year. Peltola, on the same ballot, lost to Republican now-Congressman Nick Begich III by just 2 percent.
Air Force One turns around shortly after takeoff for Trump's trip to Switzerland https://t.co/zWxk9QusKQ
— Fox News (@FoxNews) January 21, 2026
“To Every American Who’s Sorry”
A moderator on Reddit’s r/greenland forum on Monday decided he’d had enough from American users who stop by to post their apologies 10+ times a day, writing in a post headlined “To Every American Who’s Sorry” that “We’re getting at least 10 posts a day from Americans apologising, and saying things like they didn’t vote for Trump or don’t support his policies. To be blunt, none of that actually matters. You can say you’re different from the rest of Americans, but to the rest of the world, that distinction doesn’t exist. To us, your country is a single entity on the world stage, and it’s threatening its allies. Think about how you view other countries. For example, Russian opposition doesn’t change what Russia does, because that’s their domestic politics.”
“The same thing applies to the US too, except you had the power to choose your president, and you may still have it. So instead of coming here nonstop to apologise on behalf of your country for your constant need for sympathy, focus on actually changing something while you still can.”
Hmmm… On one hand you can see where he’s coming from in terms of his subreddit being brigaded by American libs when it’s supposed to be by and for Greenlanders and about their local politics and culture. Sometimes moderators just want users to stay on topic, so in the practical sense it’s no doubt annoying as shit to see localized memes about dogsledding and pics of a new brewery in Nuuk being bumped by apologies that are meaningless in terms of impact on Greenland’s future.
Former Burkina Faso junta leader Paul-Henri Sandaogo Damiba is in troooouuuble as authorities in neighboring Togo on Saturday handed the fugitive over to the current junta Ibrahim Traore – who took power in a coup against Damiba in 2022 – to answer for a plot against Traore, the BBC reports.
God almighty Sean Hanntiy just got fuckin manhandled by Dem Tennessee state Representative Justin Jones who did not give a damn about deference to the host. Key takedown: “All you do is keep fearful because you get paid $45 million a year to keep people fearful so they don’t pay attention to the CEOs taking their healthcare. You don’t care about the American people. You want them to be afraid of immigrants because all you have is fear,” which just might be the first time any Fox News viewers had the reality of their poisonous drug of choice spelled out to them so plainly.
Lindsey Halligan gives up the ghost
“During her 120-day tenure as Interim United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia, Lindsey Halligan served with the utmost distinction and an unwavering commitment to the rule of law. By prosecuting the most serious offenders including violent criminal illegal aliens, murderers, and child abusers, Lindsey worked tirelessly to protect the more than six million residents of Eastern Virginia. Democratic Senators weaponized the blue slip process, making it impossible for Lindsey’s term as United States Attorney to continue following the expiration of her 120-day appointment.”
“Despite multiple, unnecessary legal obstacles placed in her path, Lindsey stepped forward at a critical juncture for our Nation and fulfilled her responsibilities with courage and resolve. Her departure is a significant loss for the Department of Justice and the communities she served. While we will feel her absence keenly, we are confident that she will continue to serve her country in other ways. The circumstances that led to this outcome are deeply misguided. We are living in a time when a democratically elected President’s ability to staff key law enforcement positions faces serious obstacles. The Department of Justice will continue to seek review of decisions like this that hinder our ability to keep the American people safe,” says scumbag AG Pam Bondi in a statement.
Translation: “Wah wah wah! I hate Blue Slips! We should be able to confirm whatever incompetent idiots we want and also lie to our own voters that this dipshit who couldn’t even put together a case against Jim Comey and Letita James was actually good at her job! Please don’t fire me too!”
Second Lady Usha Vance on Tuesday announced she’s pregnant with a fourth pollution of white America’s racial purity who’ll hopefully be lucky enough to not have as pumpkin-shaped of a head.
You will not be surprised to learn that, according to Axios, the Trump Regime last week disclosed to a court that the incels Elon Musk hired to fuck up the government may have improperly accessed sensitive Social Security records and shared it with a third party server in violation of a judge’s order.
If you like that then you’ll love this: Axios writes that “At least two DOGE employees, the filing reveals, were in touch with a political advocacy group that asked them to analyze data from state voter rolls as part of its effort to overturn election results. One of the employees signed a ‘Voter Data Agreement’ with the group, according to the filing. It’s unclear what the agreement entailed.”
A now-former salesman at a Hamburg, Pennsylvania Honda dealership is facing charges of terroristic threats and related offenses after reacting poorly to his termination earlier this month, specifically removing his shirt and challenging his supervisor to a fight – possibly in front of customers – and screaming “You’re lucky I don’t throw you through the wall!” WBRE reports.
Tim McFarland, 39, and whose Facebook profile centers his entire identity around his former job, to the point where his name on the platform is literally “Tim Leadcar Honda,” reportedly trashed his desk as he was emptying it out during the unceremonious January 6th firing. It’s not clear what prompted McFarland’s termination and, although his Facebook posts convey urgencies such “Help me reach my goal of 100 reviews by end of October!” those come across as more conventionally anodyne “motivated” than desperate, so poor sales performance does not seem especially likely.
If anything it seems Tim dreads a demotion from Honda to Hyundai more than he does legal issues.
Walz, Frey, and Ellison subpoenaed
Regime DOJ officials on Tuesday served grand jury subpoenas to Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey, Minnesota Gov Tim Walz, and state Attorney General Keith Ellison’s office in search of a crime, Fox News reports to the thrill of their fans who REALLY don’t want to be let down this time.
Amazon CEO Andrew Jassy on Tuesday told CNBC that for real the global megacorporation is raising prices on consumers due to convicted felon President Trump’s stupid fucking tariffs, Axios reports. “Some sellers are deciding that they’re passing on those higher costs to consumers. Some are deciding that they’ll absorb it to drive demand and some are doing something in between,” Jassy said, adding they “don’t have endless options,” given mid-single-digit operating margins for retail.
“If people’s costs go up by 10 percent, there aren’t a lot of places to absorb it,” he said.
“The Alabama State Fire Marshall, Opelika Fire Department (OFD), and the Opelika Police Department (OPD) are currently investigating two separate fires that occurred on January 13 and January 19, 2026, at childcare facilities in Opelika. On January 13, 2026, at approximately 3:23 am, OFD responded to a structure fire at By His Grace Daycare and Learning Center, located at 311 South 6th Street. On January 19, 2026, just after 11:30 pm, Opelika Fire responded to the Children Palace Learning Center, located at 116 Columbus Parkway, regarding a structure fire.”
“Firefighters were able to extinguish both fires, and no injuries were reported in either incident. The initial investigation led to the discovery of glass mason jars filled with accelerant at both locations. Investigators are working to determine if the two fires are linked” says the City of Opelika, Alabama in a press release via WRBL, who report that 140 kids are without childcare due to the arsons.
Now in normal times this being merely felony-level elimination of the competition in a market by the owner of another daycare center would be the first motive that most people would look at. Thing is that Opelika is not a three-daycare center town of 2,000 or so, but a small city of 26,000 and around a dozen daycare centers, plus at least several more in neighboring Auburn, home to the famous sportsball college of the same name. The two establishments that were torched – several blocks apart – do have another one in between them, so maybe the arson cops are calling the nearby non-profit Child Care Resource Center, Inc‘s leadership in for intense rounds of questioning.
Barring that however, we’re left with the disconcerting possibility that an individual or individual(s) who vote for a certain party, are viewers of a certain propaganda network, and believe a certain specific line of bullshit about daycare centers – specifically ones dependent on public subsidies disbursed by the federal government to the states – might have decided “to take the law into their own hands” by torching the two centers that families in a seemingly middle-class-ish neighborhood depend upon. So given that context, yeah it’s worth raising. Never mind that the “empty daycare centers” of course are going to be empty at fucking 3:23 AM and 11:30 PM. The asshole was worried about getting caught throwing his mason jar molotovs, not accidentally burning anyone to death.
Security cam footage obtained by 9News showing MAGA former Mesa County, Colorado Clerk Tina Peters attempting to choke another inmate during a very brief and – despite the sarcastic headline here – not particularly violent scrap in the La Vista Correctional Facility in Pueblo on Sunday night.
Either way it gives lie to the portrayal of Peters by her patron, convicted felon President Trump, as a frail and innocent old lady who does not deserve to be in prison for nine years, even though her election conspiracy bullshit cost local taxpayers millions for Dominion equipment that needed to be replaced after the fucking idiot thought she was “proving” the 2020 election was stolen from Trump.
Who leaked the footage and why is unclear but it’s not terribly hard to guess given that it was preceded by this press release posted on Peters’ official website which, sur-fucking-prise, describes an altercation that has very little in common with what little is visible in the video above:
“Last night, Tina Peters was assaulted approximately 9pm MT in La Vista Correctional Facility. Tina was inside a maintenance closet to fill up a water unit when an inmate approached her in the closet and began striking her in anger. Tina raised her hands and pushed the inmate away in defense of herself. Per Tina, the camera showed her pushing the inmate away from her out of the closet. She was subsequently handcuffed, shackled, and brought to solitary confinement. Tina was told she is being charged with Felony Assault for defending herself against an unprovoked attack.”
Sources tell CNN that Convicted felon President Trump’s enforcers are expected to subpoena Minnesota Attorney General Keith Ellison to harass him for being a Dem in a metro under violent occupation by ICE. Gov Tim Walz and Minneapolis Mayor Jacob Frey are also expected to be subpoenaed soon and who the hell knows what the Reich will try to get a grand jury to approve.
“The Department of Homeland Security and ICE must start talking about the murderers and other criminals that they are capturing and taking out of the system. They are saving many innocent lives!”
“There are thousands of vicious animals in Minnesota alone, which is why the crime stats are, Nationwide, the BEST EVER RECORDED! Show the Numbers, Names, and Faces of the violent criminals, and show them NOW. The people will start supporting the Patriots of ICE, instead of the highly paid troublemakers, anarchists, and agitators!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday, evidently under the impression that DHS doesn’t already overhype every single legitimately dangerous migrant they detain on top of exaggerating the threats of the non-violent ones.
And obviously panicking over the absolutely appropriate level of bad press that his regime is getting for doing shit like forcing an elderly US citizen in his underwear out on the front lawn in the freezing cold to be interrogated by ICE, who had the wrong house. Stevie Miller must getting real friggin nervous that his fat orange boss’s iron will is plainly bending under sustained, self-inflicted pressure.
The post came in the middle of a binge of extremely deranged shit like reposting @17QStorm’s yarn about Joe Biden colluding with China during the 2020 election and a screenshot of some other asshole’s tweet saying “So at what point are we going to realize the enemy is within China and Russia are the boogeymen when the real threat is the UN, NATO and this ‘religion.’ I put ‘religion’ in quotes because it’s not a religion, it’s a ☠️ cult🫨! Yeh, I went there👊,” the “religion” being Islam.
Never forget the 1/18 attack
Never forget the 1/18 attack when Don Lemon’s terrorists hijacked a Minnesota church and crashed it into the MAGA media news cycle. The enemies of freedom can run but they can’t hide. Let’s roll.
Louisiana Senator Bill Cassidy, the only Republican still serving in the chamber not named Susan Collins or Lisa Murkowski to have voted to convict the demented grandpa in the White House in the second impeachment, was in the room during the Greater Baton Rouge Business Report‘s “Power Breakfast” shindig on Tuesday morning when Pelican State Congresswoman Julia Letlow stood up and announced she’ll be challenging him in the upcoming primary, according to the host outlet.
“It’s an honor to share with you, after the endorsement and encouragement from the president of the United States, Donald Trump, that I will officially be announcing my candidacy for the US Senate,” Letlow said, referencing the Orange God Emperor’s pre-endorsement of her bid and the thanks that Cassidy, a physician, gets for being a team player and being the deciding vote to put Robert F Kennedy Jr in charge of destroying US public health policy, among other capitulations of whatever principles that Cassidy maintains he still possesses. Even crueler to Cassidy is that, similarly to Bobby Brainworms, the all-but-certainly-doomed senator can thank the COVID pandemic for putting Julia Letlow in a position to make his life miserable as she won an early 2021 special election for a seat never occupied by her late husband Luke, a freshman Congressman-elect who died of the virus in December 2020 just days before he would’ve been sworn into office.
Enjoy spending your remaining years on this planet calling Julia to get her to support AstraZeneca’s newest legislation, Bill. You know the phone number for her future office, you chud.
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