Three ICE agents stuck in Djibouti after a federal court blocked the transfer of eight undocumented criminals are not having a great time in the tiny, impoverished African country, with sources telling the New York Post they’re dealing with malaria, fumes from constant burning of trash and human waste, and guarding the eight while they’re imprisoned in shipping containers on a US Navy base.

“It is outrageous that this judge is putting the health and safety of law enforcement officers at risk for the sake of criminals,” said the source, blaming the judge when it was convicted felon President Trump who sent them there in the first place for some fucking reason. Seven of these guys were simply pulled out of prisons – one of them was doing a life sentence – and shipped to Africa because they were dangerous criminal aliens… who again, were nearly all in prison, doing the time that a judge had sentenced them to, shipped to South Sudan without any real explanation of why.

New German Chancellor Freidrich Merz is doing the shit work on Thursday, stuck in the Oval Office with a demented senior who wear orange makeup and for whom full sentences are optional.

“I just concluded a very good phone call with President Xi, of China, discussing some of the intricacies of our recently made, and agreed to, Trade Deal,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Thursday, evidently now resorting to simply lying about reaching a trade deal with China.

“The call lasted approximately one and a half hours, and resulted in a very positive conclusion for both Countries. There should no longer be any questions respecting the complexity of Rare Earth products. Our respective teams will be meeting shortly at a location to be determined. We will be represented by Secretary of the Treasury Scott Bessent, Secretary of Commerce Howard Lutnick, and US Trade Representative, Ambassador Jamieson Greer. During the conversation, President Xi graciously invited the First Lady and me to visit China, and I reciprocated. As Presidents of two Great Nations, this is something that we both look forward to doing. The conversation was focused almost entirely on TRADE. Nothing was discussed concerning Russia/Ukraine, or Iran. We will inform the Media as to scheduling and location of the soon to be meeting. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” the fat bastard continued. Unclear why he mentions Russia and Iran weren’t discussed.

Like they probably didn’t discuss Vanuatu or Cameroon or the Falkland Islands either. The dumbass already has his undersized hands full with unfucking the trade situation and finding an “off ramp” with China, so it’d be best if he did not bring anything else up on the call with Beijing’s overlord.

“We are very sad to report this evening that Donner (b 2023) was found deceased today. He sustained injuries consistent with fighting with another stallion, including a broken neck. While it is devastating to lose a healthy, young horse from the herd, this is what it means to be wild and free.”

“This kind of behavior may seem brutal to us, but it is a natural part of healthy herd dynamics. This colt’s death should serve as a reminder of just how fragile life can be for these horses. They face so many natural challenges to their survival; there is no guarantee that every foal will make it to adulthood, even under the best circumstances. We can’t control nature (and we wouldn’t want to) but we can control our own actions. Please give the horses plenty of space, never feed them, and be a good steward of the environment. Donner’s life was short, but it was wild from start to finish.”

“That is something to be celebrated, even as we grieve. Rest peaceful and free, young man. We will miss you,” says a Facebook post from the Corolla Wild Horse Fund, an Outer Banks, North Carolina-based conservancy dedicated to protecting the islands’ hoofed herds from external threats.

Wow, what a solid new talking point. “It’s not kicking people off Medicaid. It’s transitioning from Medicaid to employer-provided healthcare. So yes, we’ve got 10 million people that are not gonna be on Medicaid, but they then are gonna be on employer-provided healthcare,” meaning that you have to go find a job that offers health insurance, which surely are plentiful and within reach for all the people out in MAGAmerica who dropped out of high school and have criminal records. And if they aren’t, employers will absolutely start hiring and offering them health insurance because they’re saving so much on taxes. Plus the tariffs will help create those jobs. It’ll work out. Just watch.

“Nonfarm business sector labor productivity decreased 1.5 percent in the first quarter of 2025, the US Bureau of Labor Statistics reported today, as output decreased 0.2 percent and hours worked increased 1.3 percent. (All quarterly percent changes in this release are seasonally adjusted annualized rates.) This is the first decline in nonfarm business sector labor productivity since the second quarter of 2022. From the same quarter a year ago, nonfarm business sector labor productivity increased 1.3 percent in the first quarter of 2025,” says the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

“In the first quarter of 2025, nonfarm business sector productivity decreased 1.5 percent, a 0.7-percentage point downward revision from the previously reported decrease of 0.8 percent. Output was revised up 0.1 percentage point to a decrease of 0.2 percent and hours worked were revised up 0.7 percentage point to an increase of 1.3 percent. Unit labor costs increased 6.6 percent rather than increasing 5.7 percent as previously reported, reflecting a 0.2-percentage point upward revision to hourly compensation and a 0.7-percentage point downward revision to labor productivity.”

In related news, the Associated Press reports that unemployment benefit applications rose to an eight month high of 247,000, beating analysts’ expectations of 237,000. L0wEr tEh R8 p0WeLL!!!1

Convicted felon President Trump is currently in the middle of a phone call with Chinese dictator Xi Jinping, having secret talks that nobody at the White House would tell NBC News about.

You know we have a $10 or $37 trillion or something debt or deficit and the government just keeps running stupid webcams like this one? What’s the purpose of it? Okay, well so what? Volcanoes erupt all the time. Meanwhile we still have millions of illegal immigrants running around at Harvard and they’re really antisemitic. Plus they go on to Harvard Law and the Medical School and take jobs from regular Americans. Government spending is out of control and we need a huge tax cut to get out of the Biden economy. Elon Musk is right about spending and no one’s going to get kicked off Medicaid. Democrats are lying about that, just like they lied about the Autopen. Somebody’s going to jail for that. President Trump is right about the tax cut and the CBO is lying about the deficit increase. The bill will create lots of jobs and the CBO isn’t accounting for enough economic growth and tariff revenue. Also the deficit will explode if the bill is passed and it will put us in debt slavery.

In conclusion, Democrats want to allow kids to identify as cats and use litter boxes at schools.

National Zero will resume our regular coverage after this important editorial summary of the Republican Party’s position on the issue of live webcams installed at Mt Kilauea in Hawaii.

Team Anti-Waste, Fraud, and Abuse are spending $2.1 million in taxpayer funds to conduct a full investigation of whether DEI policies cause plane crashes like the January collision between an Army Blackhawk and a passenger jet over the Potomac that killed 67 people, the Atlantic reports.

The investigation, outsourced to Elon Musk and Eric Adams’s lawyer Alex Spiro, is close to concluding and “not expected to find that programs aimed at ensuring representation for women and people of color are responsible for this year’s string of aviation disasters,” the Atlantic writes.

Bronx/Queens Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio Cortez tells the New York Times she’s endorsing progressive state Assemblyman Zohran Mamdani for mayor, which is kind of a big deal for the surging liberal ahead of the June 24th Dem primary in which disgraced former Gov Andrew Cuomo once had a pretty prohibitive lead in polling. Libs hope to avoid a repeat of the crowded 2021 field that let idiot now-Mayor Eric Adams float to the top of a pond of lefties who couldn’t consolidate.

“Assemblymember Mamdani has demonstrated a real ability on the ground to put together a coalition of working-class New Yorkers that is strongest to lead the pack,” Ocasio-Cortez said. “In the final stretch of the race, we need to get very real about that.”

Loser Secretary of State Marco Rubio is working on using the Balkans region of Europe as a dumping ground for undocumented migrants since the El Salvador and South Sudan intenrment schemes worked so well, Bloomberg reports on more moronic policy misadventures from Team Trump.

We are in a struggle for the survival of civilization itself and we have libertarians threatening to derail the entire agenda over bogus CBO pie charts. We will be debating these matters over the ruins of the West if we don’t control migration. https://t.co/HxtpEr94w4

— Stephen Miller (@StephenM) June 5, 2025

You might not be okay if an immigrant took your wife to his private spaceport city in Texas and then started threatening to throw his money around to demolish all your hard work, so don’t judge.

Though of course he would never admit it in public, convicted felon President Trump thought the coordinated Ukrainian drone strike which wiped out a third of Russia’s bomber fleet over the weekend was “badass,” sources tell Axios. “Pretty strong,” one minion said of Donald’s private response. “He thought it was badass,” said another. A third said “from an international perspective, you’ve got a chihuahua inflicting some real damage on a much bigger dog,” which is a pretty lame assessment of Ukraine. By landmass it’s the largest country entirely in Europe and still within the top ten in population – even after depletion due to the Russian attack – though its pre-war economic weight was ranked by some measures around 20th to 25th out of roughly 45 European countries.

“The drone attack didn’t surprise him, because this is what happens when the war continues, but he is concerned that it will prolong the fighting. He wants the fighting to stop, so it disappoints him whenever there is an attack like that,” one Trump minion said to Axios, saying the concern is that the strike was a serious blow to not just Russia’s ability to attack Ukraine, but its nuclear capabilities.

Former Florida Republican Congressman David Jolly, who served in the state’s 13th Congressional District from 2014 to 2017, left the GOP in 2018, and has since registered as a Dem, on Thursday launched a gubernatorial bid to (likely) face asshole felon Byron Donalds, Huffington Post reports.

An entire book could be written about this tweet and the article it does not actually link to, but going to try to keep it under two-ish, maybe three thousand words. The story in question was printed at Fox Business News on Sunday night, headlined “Trump Burger chain grows popular in Texas, controversial with critics” to which main Fox News amped up the defiance with the “despite,” lol.

FAST FEUD: An emerging restaurant chain in the Lone Star State is making waves — specifically, red ones — with a menu and décor inspired by none other than @realDonaldTrump. pic.twitter.com/plwYaNAjbk

— Fox News (@FoxNews) June 2, 2025

There’s another, bigger, continuity/unit cohesion effort issue in the text of the article itself, as Fox Business News content factory line worker Alexander Hall writes in the lede “A new burger chain themed around President Donald Trump is growing in Texas, and those who don’t vocally support him find it to be in poor taste. A Lebanese immigrant named Roland Beainy reportedly opened the restaurant chain, ‘Trump Burger,’ featuring burgers branded with the president’s name, American flags, and joke items themed around his Democratic rivals,” emphasis added on the owner’s identity being contingent and unverified pending confirmation. It’s as though Hall would have picked up the phone to ask who the owner is or, if it was after hours, conducted a search of Texas business records to nail it down but was up against a deadline to get the piece up at 10 PM EDT on a Sunday.

Or Hall could’ve just searched FoxBusiness.com, the website he works for, and found the January 30th, 2025 article “Trump Burger chain expanding in Texas, owner praises president as ‘gentleman that makes peace'” in which Hall’s colleague Louis Casiano fucking interviewed Beany.

“I have determined that it is necessary to restrict the entry of foreign nationals who seek to enter the United States solely or principally to participate in a course of study at Harvard University or in an exchange visitor program hosted by Harvard University. Such restrictions are authorized under sections 212(f) and 215(a) of the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA), 8 USC 1182(f) and 1185(a), which authorize the President to suspend entry of any class of aliens whose entry would be detrimental to the interests of the United States. I have determined that the entry of the class of foreign nationals described above is detrimental to the interests of the United States because, in my judgment, Harvard’s conduct has rendered it an unsuitable destination for foreign students and researchers. Until such time as the university shares the information that the Federal Government requires to safeguard national security and the American public, it is in the national interest to deny foreign nationals access to Harvard under the auspices of educational exchange,” says a White House announcement really sticking it to the most prestigious university on the planet.

Convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday imposed the same travel ban he did in 2017, blocking citizens of Afghanistan, Chad, Republic of the Congo, Equatorial Guinea, Eritrea, Haiti, Iran, Libya, Myanmar, Somalia, Sudan, and Yemen from entering and partially restricts those from Burundi, Cuba, Laos, Sierra Leone, Togo, Turkmenistan, and Venezuela, CBS News’s Jennifer Jacobs reports.

Convicted felon President Trump may or may not end up talking to reporters at this “soiree” whatever the hell it is, but running it here in case it does as the fat bastard might just get provoked into saying something that’ll intensify the already fairly heated Musk-GOP war.

Popular radio host Charlamagne Tha God on Tuesday questioned Congressman Eric Swalwell on why voters should ever trust Dems again after Tha God read Jake Tapper’s and Alex Thompson’s book “Original Sin,” the New York Post reports on a major scoop that Mediaite somehow missed.

“I just finished reading the ‘Original Sin,’ so when I hear you talk, I’m like, well, what was the Democrats’ excuse when they chose to be accomplices in the cover-up of Biden’s physical and mental decline? It’s the same thing. Y’all got on television and pretended to act like everything was fine, knowing behind the scenes he was not the one,” Tha God said to Swalwell. Like holy shit, this should’ve been a pretty big deal on Mediaite and they kind of dropped the ball.

Charlamagne both-siding AND “Original Sin”? What the fuck, Mediaite? Like “SiriusXM’s Michelle Beadle Goes OFF After Hearing That Stephen A Smith’s New Show Will Take Her Time Slot – Says She Was Blindsided By Move” was good, but it wasn’t Charlamagne x Original Sin good.

Haven’t been this let down by Mediaite since they missed the Scott Jennings tweet about Bill Maher.

Colorado US District Judge Gordon Gallagher on Wednesday ordered a halt to the Trump Regime’s deportation proceedings against the wife and five kids of Boulder terrorist asshole Mohamed Soliman, who used a flamethrower to torch 12 participants in the local Jewish community’s Sunday demonstration calling for the release of the remaining Israeli hostages held by Hamas in Gaza.

In April Soliman’s oldest, daughter Habiba, was locally recognized as one of the “Best and Brightest” and was awarded a scholarship to attend the University of Colorado as a pre-med student. It’s not clear what the point is in ruining her life other than just simple cruelty and malice to the vulnerable.