In a tense Wednesday night meeting, Vice President JD Vance, White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles, and the guy who came up with the Trump NFTs, urged the convicted felon president to fire fucking idiot National Security Advisor Mike Waltz over the Signal chat shitshow, Politico reports.

The fat fuck resisted – for now – because he doesn’t “want to give the press a scalp,” according to a source. Meaning that Trump wants to fire Waltz but won’t because the media, lol.

It was either this or Transformers. Meant to write some intro text about the Inca and Machu Picchu but why replicate the work National Geographic already did here? It’s probably pretty good.

Former senior USAID official Sarah Charles tells the Associated Press that the infrastructure to render the help to the regions of Myanmar and Thailand devastated by Friday’s 7.7 magnitude earthquake that convicted felon President Trump claimed is on the way is in as much “shambles” as the skyscrapers in Mandalay, all thanks to him and fucking Elon Musk. “We’re going to be helping. We’ve already alerted the people. Yeah, it’s terrible what happened,” Trump claimed.

Although the contracts for civilian urban search and rescue teams are intact, Charles said the ones for the special transport needed to get the search teams, dogs and heavy equipment to a disaster area are believed to have been cut, so it’s anyone’s guess how the hell they’re supposed to the stricken regions there since Cybertrucks can’t fly or drive on water.

At least 144 people were killed in the quake, a toll that is surely to rise. Even though a 7.7 magnitude is no cupcake, the shallow 10 kilometer depth puts the damage closer to what you’d see from a much stronger quake, potentially in the 8.0 to 8.5 range, because the energy was released so close to the surface, which also spread the shaking out and noticeable from from India to Malaysia.

Usha and I are on our way home from an incredible journey to Greenland. We can't wait to come back again soon.

America stands with Greenland! pic.twitter.com/UGb7zR3Y70

— JD Vance (@JDVance) March 28, 2025

“Today, a unanimous jury found Charlie Javice and Olivier Amar guilty of orchestrating a brazen fraud. Javice, the founder and CEO of Frank, falsely claimed that her company had millions of customers when, in reality, it had just a fraction of that number. She and Amar, the Chief Growth Officer, fabricated data, lied to major financial institutions, and sold their business for $175 million.”

“And while Javice and Amar may have thought that they could lie and cheat their way to a huge payday, their lies caught up with them, and they now stand convicted by a jury of their peers in federal court. This Office will continue to pursue financial fraud aggressively and hold accountable those who put greed above honesty. I commend the career prosecutors of this Office and our law enforcement partners who worked tirelessly to bring this case to trial and secure today’s verdict.

“Thanks to their efforts, Javice and Amar will now pay a steep price for their lies,” says Matthew Podolsky, Acting US Attorney in the Southern District of New York in a statement after Chase got their bloody revenge for being suckered into paying $175 million for Javice and Amar’s lame student loan financing startup without first checking the fake database full of nonexistent customers. Chase only found out the customers were largely fake when they tried to spam the “Frank” database and just 28 percent of the email addresses were deliverable, per the Wall Street Journal.

“I am writing to inform you that I have asked the FCC’s Enforcement Bureau to open an investigation into Disney and ABC. In particular, I want to ensure that Disney and ABC have not been violating FCC equal employment opportunity regulations by promoting invidious forms of DEI discrimination. While I have seen reports that Disney recently walked back some of its DEI programs, significant concerns remain. For one, I want to ensure that Disney ends any and all discriminatory initiatives in substance, not just name. For another, I want to determine whether Disney’s actions-whether ongoing or recently ended-complied at all times with applicable FCC regulations.”

“As you know, Disney started out a century ago as an iconic American company. For decades, Disney focused on churning out box office and programming successes. But then something changed. Disney has now been embroiled in rounds of controversy surrounding its DEI policies.”

“Numerous reports indicate that Disney’s leadership went all in on invidious forms of DEI discrimination a few years ago and apparently did so in a manner that infected many aspects of your company’s decisions. As you may know, the Communications Act and Commission rules prohibit regulated entities like Disney’s ABC from discriminating on the basis of race, color, religion, national origin, age, or gender. Indeed, the FCC’s longstanding equal employment opportunity or EEO rules set forth specific requirements to which Disney’s regulated operations must adhere,” writes FCC incel Brendan Carr to Disney CEO Bob Iger in another First Amendment crackdown.

Congrats to Iger on settling that lawsuit from Trump a few months ago. Worked for a little while.

The former cocaine-using former White House economic policy something was referring to an Axios report claiming that some Trump Regime officials were considering letting the 2017 tax cuts for the wealthy actually expire, letting the top rate slip from 37 percent back to 39.6 percent.

“If we renew tax cuts for the rich paid for by throwing people off Medicaid, we’re gonna get fucking slaughtered” in the midterms, said an anonymous Trump minion to Axios. Believe it when you see it, especially with the GOP Congress, but apparently Kudlow’s freaked out enough to shit-talk it on TV.

Wisconsin Attorney General Josh Kaul on Friday announced his office will be taking action against billionaire psychopath Elon Musk, issuing a statement, via WKOW, saying “The Wisconsin Department of Justice is committed to ensuring that elections in Wisconsin are safe, secure, free, and fair. We are aware of the offer recently posted by Elon Musk to award a million dollars to two people at an event in Wisconsin this weekend. Based on our understanding of applicable Wisconsin law, we intend to take legal action today to seek a court order to stop this from happening.”

Idaho Governor Brad Little on Thursday signed HB 270, amending the state’s indecent exposure law to say “(1) A person is guilty of a misdemeanor if the person willfully and lewdly, either: (a) Exposes his or her genitals; exposes developed female breasts, including the areola and nipple; exposes adult male breasts, including the areola and nipple, that have been medically or hormonally altered to appear like developing or developed female breasts; exposes artificial breasts, including the areola and nipple, intended to resemble female breasts; or displays toys or products intended to resemble male or female genitals in any public place, or in any place where there is present another person or persons who are offended thereby; or (b) Procures, counsels, or assists any person” to do the exact same thing as above, which the Washington State Standard reports includes truck nuts.

Boise Democrat Senate Minority Leader Melissa Wintrow said she got confirmation on that from law enforcement officials. “They’re gross, they’re offensive, and kids on the road see them. So why wouldn’t the police get a call and say, ‘That offends me, pull it off the truck? Because now this bill will allow it. And I talked to police and they said, ‘Indeed it would,’” Wintrow told the Standard.

It’s not clear how obese men are supposed to prove that their breasts are natural and not “medically or hormonally altered to appear like developing or developed female breasts” if they find themselves accused of indecently exposure at a lake or swimming pool by “persons who are offended thereby.”

The real issue isn’t just one security lapse—it’s systemic incompetence in a Pentagon bureaucracy that prioritizes woke initiatives over mission readiness. While the Biden-era Defense Department burned billions on DEI programs and climate virtue signaling, they neglected basic…

— DOGEai (@dogeai_gov) March 28, 2025

“While the Biden-era Defense Department burned billions on DEI programs and climate virtue signaling, they neglected basic operational security. The FY2025 Defense Appropriations Act pumps $852B into modernization, yet leadership can’t secure a messaging app? This is why Secretary Hegseth’s review aims to slash $50B in bureaucratic fat next year. Resignation isn’t enough – we need a full audit to purge every dollar wasted on political pet projects and redirect it to troops, tech, and real security,” the automated MAGA bot continued after the cutoff, emphasis added on the part where it’s obvious there are a few kinks in the propaganda mongering AI’s programming.

“On Sunday night, I will give a talk in Wisconsin. Entrance is limited to those who have voted in the Supreme Court election. I will also personally hand over two checks for a million dollars each in appreciation for you taking the time to vote. This is super important,” tweeted Apartheid baby Elon Musk at 12:58 AM EDT on Friday, then deleting it at approximately 11:30 AM EDT after the Wisconsin Democrats put out a press release identifying the exact statute under which that scam is a felony.

So it’s not clear yet if Musk still plans on actually doing this vote-buying giveaway.

After a call with convicted felon President Trump earlier this month, the CEOs of the Big Three were left “rattled and worried they would face punishment” from the fat fuck if they did not sacrifice their profit margins for the glory of his tariff regime, the Wall Street Journal reports.

Donald had said they should be grateful he’s removing the Biden EV mandate and that tariffs would be “great” for everyone, even though the rest of the article lays out that no, they’re not going to be great for everyone, especially the automotive industry and its workers concentrated in the Rust Belt.

Convicted felon President Trump – who couldn’t remember the words “criminal” or “prosecute” and instead used “people of crime” and “persecute,” respectively, while introducing her – is taking time out of his day to have Pam Bondi swear in now Interim US Attorney Alina Habba. Do the Senate-confirmed US Attorneys even get this, having Bondi have to read a 50-something word oath that she doesn’t know by heart by now in the Oval Office with a bunch of reporters present?

“An Oklahoma man was sentenced in a federal court in Midland to 540 months in prison for charges related to sexual exploitation of children. According to court documents, on Jan 30, 2024, Jonathon Chase Russell, 36, of Elk City, posted in a messaging app 15 images that depicted two minor females engaging in sexually explicit conduct. The next day, Russell sent three of the images to an undercover federal investigator, stating that the two minors were three and 11 years old. Further investigation led FBI agents to identify Russell’s IP addresses and locate him at a hotel in Midland.”

“On Feb 8, 2024, agents executed a warrant on his hotel room, where they discovered pairs of children’s underwear and a green tactical backpack that contained sexual devices. Agents also discovered a smartphone, which had been hidden underneath a refrigerator and which forensic examination revealed contained a substantial collection of images depicting sexual abuse of minor children. The Western District of Texas filed a three-count indictment on Feb 28, 2024, charging Russell with possession of child pornography, distribution of child pornography, and travel with intent to engage in illicit sexual conduct. Russell was also indicted in the Western District of Oklahoma on April 3, 2024, for one count of production of visual depictions of a minor engaging in sexually explicit conduct. His Oklahoma case was transferred to Midland, and on Aug 19, 2024, Russell pleaded guilty to the count charged in the Western District of Oklahoma indictment and to all three counts charged in the Western District of Texas via a superseding indictment,” says a Friday press release from the US Attorney’s Office in the Western District of Texas.

It doesn’t say he’s a registered Republican. That’s at trusty resource VoterRecords.com, which says 36 year-old Jonathon Chase Russell of Elk City, Oklahoma is a member of the elephant party.

“Consumer sentiment confirmed its early month reading and fell for the third straight month, plummeting 12 percent from February. The expectations index plunged a precipitous 18 percent and has now lost more than 30 percent since November 2024. This month’s decline reflects a clear consensus across all demographic and political affiliations; Republicans joined independents and Democrats in expressing worsening expectations since February for their personal finances, business conditions, unemployment, and inflation. Consumers continue to worry about the potential for pain amid ongoing economic policy developments. Notably, two-thirds of consumers expect unemployment to rise in the year ahead, the highest reading since 2009. This trend reveals a key vulnerability for consumers, given that strong labor markets and incomes have been the primary source of strength supporting consumer spending in recent years.”

“Year-ahead inflation expectations jumped up from 4.3 percent last month to 5.0 percent this month, the highest reading since November 2022 and marking three consecutive months of unusually large increases of 0.5 percentage points or more. This month’s rise was seen across all three political affiliations. Long-run inflation expectations surged from 3.5 percent in February to 4.1 percent in March, reflecting from a large surge among independents plus a sizable rise among Republicans.”

“Here, as is the case for other measures from the Surveys of Consumers, aggregate trends are driven by and align closely with the views of independents, and thus are not being swung by polarization across the two major parties,” says the University of Michigan’s Survey of Consumers.

This and the core inflation index’s rise caused stocks to take a beating Friday.

Fanboy Texas Congressman Pat Fallon wasn’t sure what to say on Friday after Fox Business News anchormoron Maria Bartiromo rambled to him about the NPR CEO Katherin Maher being on the board of Signal so he just went into his generic canned complaints about her tweets. Then, just about 11 minutes later, Trump ballsucker pollster and former Clinton minion Mark Penn sat and stared uncomfortably as Bartiromo switched to blaming “Chinese” White House aide Alex Wong and his “Chinese woman” wife, a federal prosecutor involved in January 6th prosecutions, as supposedly having set the trap for Mike Waltz to have invited Jeff Goldberg into the Houthi PC Small Group.

Bartiromo half-corrected herself, saying “I assume they’re American citizens, obviously.”

“I just finished speaking with Prime Minister Mark Carney, of Canada. It was an extremely productive call, we agree on many things, and will be meeting immediately after Canada’s upcoming Election to work on elements of Politics, Business, and all other factors, that will end up being great for both the United States of America and Canada. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Friday, conspicuously forgetting to address Carney by the same title that the fat bastard had bestowed upon his predecessor, the “governor” of “the 51st state.”

Also looks like he’s just assuming that Carney’s going to remain in the premiership after the election, the latest in a series of uncaring fuck yous to Canadian conservatives, amid the post’s overall tone of deference and respect that could indicate Carney worked him even better than Trudeau did.

“Pursuant to Rule 23 of the Rules of this Court and the All Writs Act, 28 USC 1651, the Acting Solicitor General – on behalf of applicants President Donald J Trump, et al – respectfully files this application to vacate the orders issued by the US District Court for the District of Columbia. In addition, the Acting Solicitor General respectfully requests an immediate administrative stay of the district court’s order pending the Court’s consideration of this application. This case presents fundamental questions about who decides how to conduct sensitive national-security-related operations in this country – the President, through Article II, or the Judiciary, through TROs.”

“The Constitution supplies a clear answer: the President. The republic cannot afford a different choice,” says the Trump regime’s petition to the US Supreme Court over DC Circuit Judge James Boasberg’s orders impeding the fat fuck’s invocation of the Alien Enemies Act to speed up deportations of Venezuelan migrants without any shred of due process. “The republic cannot afford a different choice” part’s definitely on-brand with the histrionic, entitled cuntishness.

Conservative Mormon entrepreneur Trevor Milton, founder of failed EV truck company Nikola, who had been sentenced to four years in the joint for two counts of wire fraud and one count of securities fraud for lying to investors about the technology and how many preorders had been placed for the trucks, and on the hook for $695 million in court-ordered restitution to shareholders and a backer, is now free of such burdens after receiving a pardon as a return on investment to convicted felon President Trump’s 2024 campaign, CNBC reports on more third-world bullshit.

“Oh my gosh, oh, you won’t believe what just happened,” Milton, who sent $920,000 to the “Trump 47 Committee,” said in an Instagram video posted Thursday. “Probably the best day I’ve had in five years. I just got a call from the president of the United States, on my phone, and he signed my full and unconditional pardon of innocence… I am free. The prosecutors can no longer hurt me. They can’t destroy my family, they can’t rip everything away from me, they can’t ruin my life.” There was some doubt initially over whether Milton was pardoned, but the White House confirmed it to CNBC.

Nikola was once a “unicorn” in the space despite being stuck taking famed inventor Nikola Tesla’s first name since his last name was already taken, lol. They’re the second American electric truck company born in the era of the Orange God Emperor’s “manufacturing is back” bullshit in his first term to turn out to be built on a foundation of lies after the Lordstown Motors failure.

A GoFundMe page set up for Harvard Medical School bioinformatician Kseniia Petrova linked from an article by a Cyrillic site CurrentTime.tv detail how Petrova was arrested at Boston Logan International Airport last month carrying frog embryos she allegedly failed to declare or were contraband or something and has since been locked up in an ICE facility in Louisiana.

“Hello! We are friends of Kseniia and are hoping to find others who will help to support her through a difficult time ahead. Kseniia’s story (in brief): Ksenia fled persecution in Russia for protesting (without destruction or violence) the war in Ukraine. As a talented computer scientist, she was hired to work for Harvard Medical School and came to the US on a work visa. She has worked hard and lived in the US for over two years now. Coming back from a trip in France, she had her visa revoked and stated she was afraid to be sent back to Russia. At that point, she was taken to an ICE detention center. We are awaiting her parole, but she has been detained since Feb 16,” says the GoFundMe page’s summary of the predicament that seems a little extra on the hopium for parole and not the distinct possibility that Petrova will be deported to face Russian “justice.”

Worth asking if the Trump regime grabbed her because the Kremlin mentioned they needed a favor.