In a one-year retrospective on the massive self-own that was the House Republican Caucus’s ouster of feckless and weak now-former Speaker Kevin McCarthy, NOTUS reports that members are still “emotionally recovering” from the shambolic three-week long clusterfuck that brought them Speaker Mike Johnson, summing it up with “The House looks a lot like it did before Matt Gaetz and seven other Republicans, alongside House Democrats, voted to remove McCarthy, although Republicans have fewer members than they did then,” because now-expelled-and-convicted-felon George Santos’s seat flipped Blue and Mike Gallagher resigned too late for a special election to be held.

“They took an entire branch of government offline for three weeks, when we had two wars raging overseas,” said Pennsylvania “moderate” Brian Fitzpatrick “It was a very dark day in American history,” he added, even if it wasn’t dark enough for him to quit his shitshow of a party in disgust.

“There are many tragedies of the McCarthy ouster,” South Dakotan Dusty Johnson said. “But I think the eight renegades who ousted him have to acknowledge that they didn’t fundamentally change anything about the House.” Lame duck Virginian Bob Good, the only one of the “renegades” to be successfully ousted in a primary during McCarthy’s “revenge tour” (and even then it was mostly Trump’s revenge over Good originally endorsing Ron DeSantis’s failed presidential bid) agreed, lol.

“No,” Good said when asked if Mike Johnsons had done a decent enough job. “Speaker Johnson’s positions have changed on many things since he became speaker. He used to be against funding for Ukraine. He said we would use that as leverage to obtain border security. Not only did we not use it as leverage for border security, he’s supported more funding for Ukraine. He used to support a warrant requirement for FISA, and he changed his position on that,” Good continued crying.

Israel troops and tanks stormed in to southern Lebanon on Tuesday in an operation to perpetuate the 70-something years-long conflict between the Jewish state and its neighbors, the BBC reports.

Capitol Hill aides in both parties told Punchbowl News on Monday that President Joe Biden’s hint that he might call Congress back in to session to pass a supplemental to fund recovery efforts from Hurricane Helene since last week’s CR authorized Biden to spend $20 billion in FEMA funds for disaster relief and that FEMA has money marked for non-urgent projects that can be diverted.

The typically GOP-friendly newsletter detects a bit more apprehension on one side though. “But should Congress have to return to session to deal with the Helene fallout, it would be a mess. Republicans are all over the place when it comes to disaster relief. There are a number of GOP lawmakers who have voted against storm aid. When Sandy hit New York and New Jersey back in 2012, 67 Republicans voted no on a disaster aid package. Many of them are still in Congress,” they write, before mentioning the obvious fact that it would take members off the campaign trail.

Sort of sounds like Punchbowl are trying to communicate some sort of mutually assured destruction being visited upon Democrats too, even though it’s obvious Republicans are going to suffer more from having to go back to work and do the right thing by the American people for however many days it takes. The Tuesday morning edition also takes a dim view of how convicted felon former President Trump’s been handling the storm’s aftermath, writing, “Where Trump is flailing: Former President Donald Trump visited Georgia Monday and claimed Kemp couldn’t get Biden on the phone to help secure much-needed aid for the state,” before listing off all the blatant lies the fat fuck spewed as well including his cowardly escape from an NBC reporter – all in contrast to positive reporting on how Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris have conducted the response so far.

Pennsylvania absentee voting underway in some counties https://t.co/LcQl7s7lub

— Fox News (@FoxNews) October 1, 2024

A new survey of Pennsylvania likely voters by AARP/Fabrizio-Ward/Impact finds Vice President Kamala Harris leading convicted felon former President Trump 49 to 47 percent in the Keystone State.

A 43-foot tall marionette of a naked Donald Trump, the Republican presidential nominee, popped up on a roadside on the outskirts of Las Vegas suspended from a construction crane alongside the Great Basin Highway, the Independent reports.

The sculpture, made of wireframing and foam, weighs approximately three tons.  It’s part of an art exhibit called the “Crooked and Obscene Tour,” but the specific artist who constructed it chooses to remain anonymous for obvious reasons:  the anatomical measurements were apparently based on Stormy Daniels’ public descriptions.

The exhibit appeared days after Trump bragged that he had an “beautiful body.”  “You have never seen a body so beautiful, much better than Sleepy Joe,” the 78-year-old Trump boasted at a weekend rally.

Of course it’s a sensationalist headline, but not an inaccurate one:  Caroline Giuliani, the 35-year-old daughter of the Official Undead of MAGA and former lawyer Rudy Giuliani announced her endorsement of Democratic presidential nominee Kamala Harris, per her piece at Vanity Fair.

Calling her relationship with her father “cartoonishly complicated,” Caroline Giuliani described how she saw falling into the endless pit that is TrumpWorld destroy her father.  “Watching my dad’s life crumble since he joined forces with Trump has been extraordinarily painful, both on a personal level and because his demise feels linked to a dark force that threatens to once again consume America,” she warned.

Caroline added, “After months of feeling the type of sorrow that comes from the death of a loved one, it dawned on me that I’ve been grieving the loss of my dad to Trump. I cannot bear to lose our country to him too.”

Must-win Democratic Montana Senator Jon Tester will face his douchebag Republican challenger Tim Sheehy in their final battle in front of Big Sky State voters on Monday night.

Middle East think tanker Jason Brodsky and other sources are reporting that Syrian state TV propagandist Safaa Al-Ahmed was “martyred” in a Monday night Israeli airstrike on a vehicle in Damascus. Amid the chatter some of the more reactionary accounts are saying that this was a targeted assassination while others – that do not appear necessarily to be Israel apologists – are saying that’s preposterous and the actual target had to be someone Al-Ahmed was accompanying.

Or to be less euphemistic, Al-Ahmed was probably fucking some Syrian or maybe Iranian government official and picked the wrong night to shack up. It’s like if a Fox News lady was in a car with a Republican Congressman when it was hit by a Venezuelan airstrike. And yeah obviously the part about the “Venezuelan airstrike” isn’t realistic but you get the rest of the scenario.

On the eve of his 100th birthday, former President Jimmy Carter will be celebrated for his centennial birthday on Tuesday with the broadcast of a benefit concert that raised $1.3 million for his charity–a legitimate one, unlike that of a certain different former president–as well as the unveiling of thirty new homes for needy families, Politico reports.

The oldest former president in history, Carter and his wife Rosalynn, who died last year, served with Habitat for Humanity, and the group will open thirty newly-built homes in St. Paul, Minnesota to celebrate Carter’s birthday.

“I think he has probably done more personally in his post-presidency than anyone else because he’s not out there looking for attention,” Cassandra Newby-Alexander, professor of Virginia Black history and culture at Norfolk State University, said. “He’s looking to change things. He’s not out there trying to make money for himself. He’s out there trying to live the life of a Christian– a true Christian, one who cares about the poor and the homeless and the children.”

Also what the fuck is with one of his own minions, Kellyanne, interviewing him? How does that even actually qualify as an “interview” when it’s just a conversation between a woman and her boss?

Letcher County, Kentucky Sheriff Mickey Stines, who has served the people since 2018, announced his retirement on Monday, NBC News reports. Stines will move forward and focus on other pursuits, like defending himself from first degree murder charges for shooting Judge Kevin Mullins dead at the county courthouse earlier this month. His defense attorney stressed that the retirement did not equate to an admission of guilt and that his client remains innocent until pleading guilty.

Legendary Major League Scumbag Pete Rose died of something at age 83 on Monday, decades after he was declared dead to baseball over some sort of gambling scam, TMZ reports.

Asked by a reporter Monday what he thinks about convicted felon former President Trump’s bullshit lies about not doing anything to help the response to Hurricane Helene, President Biden said the fat fuck is “lying and the governor told him he was lying. I’ve spoken to the governor… I don’t know why he does this and the reason I get so angry about it, I don’t care about what he says about me, but I care what he communicates to the people that are in need. He implies that we’re not doing everything possible. We are. I assume you heard the Republican Governor of Georgia talk about that. He was on the phone with me more than once. So that’s simply not true. And it’s irresponsible.”

Very refreshing to see a leader trying to get elected simply by doing what’s necessary and not making shit up about her opponent purposely playing politics. He’s doing that on his own – and also has a history of it back during his failed administration, like with that forest-raking bullshit.

Wasau, Wisconsin’s clerk tells the Associated Press that the new ballot drop box outside city hall is bolted to the ground so fucking asshole right wing Mayor Doug Diny can’t put a handtruck under it and hide it in his office again like he did earlier this month, even though that’s the clerk’s call.

The old drop box was locked and Diny didn’t have a key. Even if he had, that didn’t matter since it was empty when he’d hidden it on September 22nd, just three days after ballots had begun being mailed out in the state. Still the district attorney asked the DOJ to investigate the son of a bitch.

“This year, the homicide and violent crime rates have continued their rapid decline from their peaks during the last administration. According to new preliminary data submitted to the FBI, in the first half of this year, the homicide rate continued to fall at record speed, declining by 22.7 percent, while the violent crime rate fell by 10.3 percent to its lowest level since 1969. These record decreases follow the historic declines in crime in 2023, including the largest-ever decrease in the homicide rate. Communities across our country are safer now than when I took office.”

“Under the previous administration, we saw the biggest increase in murder rates on record. Vice President Harris and I moved swiftly to turn it around. We passed the American Rescue Plan – despite every Republican in Congress voting against it – which has helped deliver over $15 billion in public safety funding that enabled over 1,000 state, city, and county governments to avoid cuts to police budgets, invest in community violence interventions, and keep communities safe. And we have taken more action to get illegal guns off of our streets and out of dangerous hands than any Administration, including by signing into law the most significant gun violence prevention legislation in nearly 30 years which has expanded background checks and cracked down on gun traffickers.”

“Last year, I established the first-ever White House Office of Gun Violence Prevention, overseen by Vice President Harris, to accelerate this work. Even among these historic declines, we can and must do more. That’s why, just this past week, Vice President Harris and I announced additional actions to combat machinegun conversion devices, improve school-based active shooter drills, and take other steps to reduce gun crime and save lives. I’ll continue to urge Congress pass my plan to fund 100,000 additional police officers, invest in community violence intervention programs, and make commonsense gun safety reforms, including banning assault weapons” – White House statement.

Convicted felon former President Trump was too chickenshit to handle an “MSDNC” reporter who was asking him to reconcile his claims that Republican Georgia Brian Governor Brian Kemp was not getting any help from the federal government a day after Kemp publicly thanked Biden or explain where he was getting it from that Democratic North Carolina Governor Roy Cooper was purposely holding back on responding to Republican areas of that state. Pussy-ass bitch.

Fulton County, Georgia Superior Court Judge Robert McBurney – a name some might recognize from the litigation over the grand jury investigation into fat former President Trump and his co-conspirators for their post-2020 election coup attempt in the state before it passed to Judge Scott McAfee – on Monday ruled in favor of the Sistersong Women of Color Reproductive Justice Collective et al and found the state’s six-week abortion ban, enacted in 2022, to be unconstitutional.

Of course the state’s going to appeal this and of course the state Supreme Court is (probably) going to rule in Governor Brian Kemp’s favor in the end but the ruling probably comes at an inopportune time for Republicans, especially considering the ban is exactly what killed Amber Thurman in 2022.

A 61 year-old Farmington Hills, Michigan man faces charges of felony ethnic intimidation and misdemeanor assault/battery after a confrontation last week with a Black female US Postal Service carrier over mailers from Vice President Kamala Harris’s campaign, the Detroit Free Press reports.

The man, Russel Valleau, screamed at the carrier, telling her he “did not want that ‘Black bitch’ in his mailbox,” before repeating the same insult directed at the carrier and threatening her. She then pepper sprayed the likely Breitbart commenter in the face. Police responded and took Valleau into custody. “In this highly charged political moment, everyone has a right to their political opinion and vote,” Oakland County Prosecutor Karen McDonald said Friday. “Whatever our political beliefs, no one should be assaulted or threatened because of their race, or for doing their job.”

Valleau faces up to 27 months in prison and $5,500 in fines for defending white America.