Trump Regime officials tell the Wall Street Journal that Nobel Peace Laureate activist Maria Corina Machado was smuggled out of Venezuela to the nearby Dutch territorial island of Curacao on Tuesday so she could travel to Oslo for the Wednesday award ceremony – which she didn’t make.

“I am very grateful to them. And this is a measure of what this recognition means to the Venezuelan people,” Machado told Nobel Committee Chair Jørgen Watne Frydnes in a phone call. “We feel very emotional and very honored, and that is why I am very sad and very sorry to tell you that I won’t be able to arrive in time for the ceremony, but I will be in Oslo, and I’m on my way to Oslo right now.”

Venezuela’s attorney general, Tarek Saab, has said that Machado will be considered a fugitive if she travels to Norway. What happens next and whether Machado returns to Venezuela is unclear.

Franklin is keeping his community safe, are you?

Call the HUD Crime Hotline at 1-800-347-3735 to report illegal criminal activity in HUD-funded housing. pic.twitter.com/xOgnQFv0xP

— Department of Housing and Urban Development (@HUDgov) December 10, 2025

There’s only so much a single green cartoon herpetofauna character can be abused and mutated into a symbol of fascist white nationalism and the “official” Pepe’s been dead for eight years anyway, so why not switch things up and ruin a completely different once-innocent and carefree creation?

Dem Michigan Congresswoman Haley Stevens – a Senate primary candidate – tells the New York Times she’s had enough of Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F “Bobby Brainworms” Kennedy Jr’s batfuckery and will be introducing articles of impeachment against him.

“I am not one for political theater,” Stevens told the Times. “I am for standing up for the health and safety of the people I represent. It’s pretty clear that these are life-and-death issues for folks.”

A citizenship oath ceremony in Indianapolis on Monday ended with 38 of the 100 would-be new Americans turned away without their certificate after the Trump Regime arbitrarily and capriciously fucked them over in their cruel response to the murder of a National Guard soldier in DC last month by an Afghan national that had been granted asylum by the regime’s officials in April, NBC reports.

Indianapolis USCIS official Zhibo Zhao confirmed the oaths had been canceled due to new travel restrictions on Afghanistan, Burundi, Chad, Cuba, Equatorial Guinea, Eritrea, Haiti, Iran, Laos, Libya, Myanmar, the Republic of Congo, Sierra Leone, Somalia, Sudan, Togo, Turkmenistan, Venezuela, and Yemen. Asked if the 38 rejects – who have spent years and likely thousands and thousands of dollars in the insane grind of the legal immigration system – would have their oaths rescheduled or if they’re now subject to deportation, Zhao said “that is up to whoever’s in charge in Washington.”

“We just receive orders from the chain of command,” Zhao said. “I was in the military. Everything we do here in the federal government is just like in the military. Follow the chain of command and so on.”

Marion County Clerk Kate Sweeney Bell, who regularly sends her staff down to the oath ceremonies to register newly-eligible voters, issued a statement ripping the Trump Regime for fucking these people over: “These prospective citizens worked incredibly hard to reach this milestone. They studied our history, learned our laws, and demonstrated their commitment to our country. They arrived with their families, filled with pride and excitement, ready to take the oath of citizenship, only to have their dreams denied at the last minute by a racist policy from the federal government.”

Investigators combing through at least 315 piles of cremated human remains found last summer in empty desert land about an hour outside of Las Vegas have managed to identify just three of them and don’t expect to be able to make any progress on the remaining 312, KLAS 8 News Now reports.

Still pretty impressive that any of them could’ve been identified but it’d seem the large sample size helped. Cops still have no idea why the remains were dumped out there, though one theory is that a funeral home/crematorium went out of business and this was how they disposed of unclaimed ashes. Seems slightly too tidy though and one would think that if they have three names then they’d be able to match them with three death certificates and thus track down the culprit. Plus why wouldn’t the owners of that defunct business have found some other means of dumping the ashes better than friggin 315 (or more) distinct piles in the same patch of desert? Why not Lake Mead?

Something’s really weird and dark about all this. Maybe the failed funeral home/crematorium is the most plausible, prosaic reason but that it’s also the least bad one says a lot and nothing good.

“I have no higher priority than making America affordable again."

Watch President Trump speak in Pennsylvania last night. pic.twitter.com/ki0MchRDk1

— FOX & Friends (@foxandfriends) December 10, 2025

“In order to comply with the January 2025 Executive Order 14161 (Protecting the United States From Foreign Terrorists and Other National Security and Public Safety Threats), CBP is adding social media as a mandatory data element for an ESTA application. The data element will require ESTA applicants to provide their social media from the last 5 years,” says an update to the federal register printed Tuesday.

Just so you can “appreciate” this Trump post, coming right after he delivered indisputably the worst presidential speech in American history, even including William Henry Harrison’s inaugural address that led to his death, here’s the whole thing, in one single 487-word block of text, as posted:

Convicted felon President Trump is, no joke, at some dump of a casino in the fucking Poconos to deliver a speech in front of a banner that reads “LOWER PRICES, BIGGER PAYCHECKS” to kick off his long-awaited roadshow aimed at turning his piece of shit fascist party’s political fortunes around going into what’s expected to be a rough midterm year. Who the hell on his political team picked the goddamned “Mount Airy Casino Resort” over some kind of more normal setting that people won’t automatically associate with disabled boomers pissing away their reverse mortgage payouts on penny slot machines over the smell of roller grill hot dogs and cheap whiskey sour mix? What was wrong with, say, a historic railroad depot, a steel foundry, a high school gym, or a church?

Then again those more prosaic, everyday settings are a little less authentic to MAGA than a gutter casino with a 70-acre parking lot outside. The constant doubling down on the ephemeral promise of a big payout that never comes while every last drop of blood is sucked out of you and then you’re tossed aside is in fact much more on-brand for Trumpism than any union hall or worksite could be.

For the second time this week one of the eight or nine global conflicts that convicted felon President Trump claims to have solved is unsolving itself as the Associated Press reports that the Rwanda-backed M23 rebels have made gains in an offensive toward the strategic city of Uvira in the eastern Democratic Republic of the Congo, displacing over 200,000 civilians and sending troops fleeing.

“There’s a risk of a massacre, and many people will perish,” said local leader Marafiki Masimango, who himself had fled from Uvira as the rebels approached the city. A “senior Congolese army officer” told the AP that soldiers were fleeing the rebel offensive and heading south and east toward the border with Burundi. Always a good sign when your generals are telling the media stuff like that.

One of convicted felon President Trump’s minions anonymously tells CNN that he and other minions are begging the fat bastard to stop trying to blame “Crooked Joe” and get real on economic issues.

“Joe Biden is no longer a threat to them because he’s out of office, he’s never going to be in office again,” the “them” being MAGA voters increasingly pissed with the Orange God Emperor. “You’ve got to feel their pain. You’ve got to talk about it every day,” the advisor continued. Problem is that Trump has been talking about it every day, and by talking he’s lying and calling it a “hoax.”

Another one of Donald’s handlers says they’ve started putting “policy time” on his daily schedule to try to coach him on taking the economy seriously and lol they are so completely, utterly fucked.

NASA’s Voyager 1 probe, launched in 1977 to survey the outer solar system and is still ticking long after it drifted away from Saturn all the way back in friggin 1980, will be one light-day away from Earth in November 2026 if it doesn’t collide with an asteroid or something, CNN reports.

To put in perspective how much of a pain in the ass it is to continue to monitor and make any software/hardware tweaks to a spacecraft that old and far away, NASA/Jet Propulsion Laboratory Voyager project manager Suzy Dodd says “If I send a command at 8 am on a Monday morning, I’m going to get Voyager 1’s response back to me on Wednesday morning at approximately 8 am.”

Dodd thinks Voyagers 1 and/or 2 can make it a few years past their 50th anniversary in 2027.

Fans of the once-novel and interesting but now overhyped and over-merchandised Netflix series Stranger Things are noticing that the characters’ dialogue in the show’s now-ongoing fifth and final season has gotten considerably dumber, Kotaku reports. Many of these fans cite a January deep-dive on the company (be warned, this piece is a freaking black hole and a good one) by N+1 alleging Netflix execs instructed writers to make changes like “have this character announce what they’re doing so that viewers who have this program on in the background can follow,” because viewers are staring at their phones or laptops while “watching” the filler-content-filled service’s catalog.

The series, which in development titled “Montauk” and set in the far-eastern Long Island community home to an abandoned military base purportedly to have been the site of some bizarre government experiments, was never truly great – and it was especially maddening that for some fucking reason the characters in the second season reacted with disbelief to the presence of interdimensional aliens in their town when that was what exactly fucking happened in the first season. Still it was charming, unique, and often pretty freaky on top of all the 80s nostalgia – not something to be half-watched and thus all the actual dedicated fans are pissed over this dumbed-down final season.

Two things can be true at the same time: That people don’t pay enough attention so why even bother especially because Spartan could have some downmarket AI chatbot like Perplexity crank out the rest of this paragraph and a significant fraction of the audience won’t even notice before they scroll down to post a resistance meme from 2019. Then there’s also that maybe Netflix should try to fix that on their end by making more movies and series that people actually want to pay attention to.

“FIRST ON FOX: A House Republican is mounting an effort to make it easier for women to keep and raise their babies after birth. Rep Ashley Hinson, R-Iowa, is unveiling a bill called the Supporting Healthy Pregnancy Act that would ensure pregnant mothers get financial support from the father even before their child is born, Fox News Digital learned first,” says the lede to a press release in support of Hinson’s Senate campaign to replace quitter Joni Ernst laundered through Fox News.

Watch out deadbeat dads. This messaging bill is coming right for you negligent sons of bitches.

Also does not appear that Hinson is especially afraid of the whole mens’ rights activist movement coming after her for this. Maybe she’s onto something with that since men who can’t even get women to want to eff them aren’t exactly thinking about the next step in the dating thing.

Soon-to-be-former-Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene on Tuesday told CNN she feels “very sorry for President Trump. I genuinely do. It has to be a hard place for someone that is constantly so hateful and puts so much vitriol, name calling, and really tells lies about people in order to try to get his way,” and “It’s easy for me to say a prayer for him and forgive him. But the part that I have had a very hard time with is the fact that he called me a traitor, and because of his words, that brought serious threats against myself and my family,” before going on and on about what it’s like for MAGA to be making her life miserable while Trump basically tells her she deserves to live in constant fear.

“A CME is anticipated to arrive at Earth early to midday on 09 December causing elevated geomagnetic field activity, and dependent upon the orientation of the embedded magnetic field, potential exists for G3-Strong storm levels. Limited, minor effects to some technological infrastructure possible, but usually mitigatable. The aurora may become visible over many of the northern states and some of the lower Midwest to Oregon. The general public should consider monitoring our webpage for the latest information and updates,” says NOAA in a bulletin anticipating a massive, satisfying, and forceful release of solar spray in Earth’s direction.

Back in August New York federal Judge Paul Engelmayer responded to the Trump Regime’s bid to unseal grand jury testimony from the case against Jeffrey Epstein accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell with a denial, pointing out that it was a bullshit fake-out attempt at political ass-covering during a time when fat Donald was feeling an insane amount of heat over his refusal to be more transparent on the matter and, importantly, that most of the sealed info was already public anyway.

“The evidence put before the Maxwell grand juries is today, with only very minor exceptions, a matter of public record. The Government admitted as much in response to the Court’s order: ‘The enclosed, annotated transcripts show that much of the information provided during the course of the grand jury testimony – with the exception of the identities of certain witnesses – was made publicly available at [Maxwell’s] trial or has otherwise been publicly reported through the public statements of victims and witnesses.’ And because the Government proposes to redact the witnesses’ identities, the exception it noted does not reflect information that the public would learn were the grand jury transcripts unsealed. The Court’s review confirmed that unsealing the grand jury materials would not reveal new information of any consequence,” Engelmayer wrote.

Further down he lit into Attorney General Pam Bondi and her clown car even harder, writing “The one colorable argument under that doctrine for unsealing in this case, in fact, is that doing so would expose as disingenuous the Government’s public explanations for moving to unseal. A member of the public, appreciating that the Maxwell grand jury materials do not contribute anything to public knowledge, might conclude that the Government’s motion for their unsealing was aimed not at ‘transparency’ but at diversion – aimed not at full disclosure but at the illusion of such.”

Been a while since chairbilly James Comer’s committee has had a good live show here so what the hell, why not, right? Sometimes it’s these low-key meetings that produce the greatest laughs.

“A Fierce Declaration: Reclaiming Our Nation’s Promise My mandate in Congress was simple: safeguard our fundamental Constitutional rights and our freedoms. I immediately began work to protect the rights to reduce crime, safeguard gun ownership, protect life, ensure homeland security, and secure our freedom from burdensome taxation. The head of the FBI has firmly attested that a rogue element within the Bureau is engaged in political warfare against conservatives and Christians. I know firsthand the chilling truth of what the FBI director describes,” writes Republican former Texas Congressman Steve Stockman in a very lengthy, very self-important, very “please endorse me Orange Jesus” statement announcing his second House comeback bid.

Stockman served one term in the House from 1995 to 1997, another from 2013 to 2015, and then in federal prison from 2018 to 2020 on what would’ve been a 10 year bid for 23 counts of money laundering had convicted felon President Trump not commuted his sentence in December of that year. Why Trump did not fully pardon Stockman is unclear but the asshole was still stuck with $1,000,000 in restitution costs and supervised release conditions after being let out.