Crying over how unfair it is they got caught submitting fake signatures for the Michigan Republican gubernatorial primary and kicked off the ballot, candidates Perry Johnson and Donna Brandenburg are taking their "rules are for libtards" argument to the state's highest court after losing on appeal, the Detroit News reports. Brandenburg and Johnson, along with and Michael Markey, Michael Brown, and would-be nomination frontrunner former Detroit police Chief James Craig were booted off the ballot last month after the fraudulent petition scam was exposed. The state board of canvassers deadlocked 2-2 along party lines on the final decision, meaning the determination made by the state elections bureau staff stood and the five were hilariously removed.

"This is it. Without relief in this court, Mr. Johnson will not be on the ballot this August and every single one of the over 15,000 voters who validly signed a petition to place him on the ballot will be denied their candidate," wrote Johnson's lawyers, falsely claiming there were 15,000 real voters.

The candidates' main argument hinges on a technicality: That the state elections bureau has to individually analyze each and every one of the estimated 68,000 fraudulent signatures submitted by the campaigns, rather than the rough sampling method that they used to determine page-by-page that the scumbags were cheating. The problem for the MAGA campaigns is that the burden of proof is on them and not state elections personnel. The other problem is the hard deadline set by the Michigan Secretary of State's office for knowing whose names to print on the GOP primary ballot is Friday sooooo their lawyers might be kind of stuck screaming into the state Supreme Court's voicemail at 4:27 PM. And again at 4:29 PM. Then 4:31 PM. And a few more before finally a "You motherfuckers. You fucked us. I… I *sobs* I have never been so fucking disrespected in my entire career of election litigation *sobs* I fucking ha-a-a-ate you. Fucking die" at 5:09 PM.