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Random Headlines Thursday, Volume Zero

This is a one-off. For now. National Zero is backlogged as fuck and rather than triage coverage let’s just do it with an homage to my friend and mentor’s traditional weekly roundup. Except this is all news that would’ve otherwise been published as individual articles rather than thoughts. Well maybe some “thoughts”, but whatever. It’s still different. Especially the NZ logo bullet points.

Wednesday’s “Order 66” sweep by the FBI snagged yet another MAGA scumbag: Arizona GOP Chairwoman “Chemtrails Kelli” Ward and her husband whose name isn’t important because fuck him. Both were served subpoenas for their involvement in the fake electors scam.

Mo Brooks wants to talk to the January 6th Committee, with strings attached that it be in public, only House members question him (as opposed to staff lawyers or investigators), and strictly about January 6th itself. Weird how he just suddenly decided to cooperate this week, like something changed his mind. Wonder what could’ve happened to Mo to precipitate such a switch.

Kind of forgot that Trump minions still have active litigation against the select committee and companies that have complied with subpoenas. Well now there’s one less, as Trump spokesworm Taylor Budowich’s complaint against the Committee and Chase for handing over his bank records was tossed Thursday. Sucks for him. Maybe he should stop being such a Budo-bitch.

Pennsylvania MAGA Congressman Mike Kelly publicly denied RonAnon’s attempt to blame him for the fake electoral votes clusterfuck Johnson’s been snagged in since Tuesday’s reveal. “Senator [Ron] Johnson’s statements about Representative Kelly are patently false. Mr. Kelly has not spoken to Sen. Johnson for the better part of a decade, and he has no knowledge of the claims Mr. Johnson is making related to the 2020 election,” said Kelly in a statement. That’s not really something a person used to saying “Deal with it libtards” would say. Kelly – who was knee deep in the “Stop the Steal” shit and was listed as the lead plaintiff on the first big MAGA election lawsuit the Supreme Court spiked in December 2020 – is probably looking at what happened Wednesday to pajama boy Jeff Clark and the rest of them and decided that maybe Merrick Garland isn’t fucking around. Or Kelly got served with a subpoena himself. Remember, the DOJ didn’t actually announce any of yesterday’s “Order 66”, which is why it all got reported piecemeal by various outlets. ABC’s source for the raid on Clark was his friggin neighbor. Who knows who else got swept up?

Madison.com reports a Trump Campaign lawyer coordinated with RonAnon to deliver the fake electoral votes to Pence in the middle of the joint session on January 6th and Jesus Christ maybe Johnson should’ve just shut his fucking mouth and waited a few days before he started telling stories that were debunked. You don’t need to be Dave Wasserman or Steve Kornacki to understand this is not where you want to be with abysmal approval ratings in a tough election year.

Georgia Governor Brian Kemp’s going to testify to the Fulton County DA’s grand jury. Kemp probably isn’t going to talk to them about the Obi-Wan season finale.

This has been probably the busiest week for National Zero since the week of the Capitol riot itself. No joke. Difference is now we both compose articles from scratch instead of copying and pasting everything back then like Political Wire and JoeMyGod do (much respect for those two no matter what). Really could use just maybe a day when an “article” like this was good at the top for the better part of an hour. Three straight days of near non-stop National Zero-ing.

Oh and we’ve got and the you know what from the Supreme Court to “look forward to” tomorrow.

PS Saturday is NatZeromas, the celebration of our second birthday and the publication of our first article. Friday is NatZeromas Eve, the day the domain was registered and the Disqus feed went live. Which means Thursday is NatZeroFestivus. So air your grievances.

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Tim Pool claims some libs shot up his house

8 hours ago

Bethlehem has a Christmas tree again for the first time since 2022

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Orange Fatass spending his weekend productively

13 hours ago

Grijalva says she was pepper-sprayed by some ICE asshole

1 day ago

MAGA Florida gov hopeful’s former underage girlfriend speaks up

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Brian Cole was all in on “Stop the Steal”

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Total alpha just oozes confidence in GOP’s healthcare strategy

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Netflix buying up Warner Bros… in theory

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K$H used FBI agents as Uber drivers for his woman’s drunk friends

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Chicago’s Christians too liberal, says Jewish conservative

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ChiComs impose 13 percent tax on condoms

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Bondi commands DOJ to pursue evil leftist groups

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Toy Soldiers, or why you only matter if Democrats can be blamed

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“Shade” is “Gen-Z slang for ‘disrespect'”: MassLive.com

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Navy pew-pews 22nd “narcoterrorist” boat

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WATCH LIVE: Miserable old bastard lights up Christmas tree

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Supreme Court allows Texas to use gerrymandered map

2 days ago

Virginia grand jury no bills regime’s retry against Letitia James

2 days ago

WHOA, T-minus 16 minutes people!

2 days ago

Newly-freed MAGA terrorist Taranto spotted near Raskin’s home

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Car thief to stay put in California

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“Tonight is a sign 2026 is going to be a bitch of an election cycle”

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Nevada hit with 5.9 magnitude quake: malfunctioning USGS alert

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Crazy grandpa to restart domestic travel next year: report

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Warlord takes credit for Congo peace deal

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Bari Weiss to host “town hall” with Erika Kirk

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Brian Cole named in DC pipe bombing attempts

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Most ACA enrollees to blame Trump/Republicans if costs spike: poll

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Susan Collins fans may want to be concerned

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Regime giving Letitia James case a second go

2 days ago

Eric Adams signs order banning divestment from Israel

2 days ago

Mike Johnson trying to remove IVF funding from NDAA

3 days ago

FBI arrests January 6th pipe bomb suspect: reports

3 days ago

Georgia state GOP official caught sexting 14 year-old boy

3 days ago

Oregon has crabs again… Chinese ones

3 days ago

Gateway Pundit reports Hegseth failed to purge DEI from military

3 days ago

Missouri libs to submit anti-gerrymandering petition next week

3 days ago

Mike Lindell still alive, to run for Minnesota governor

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Grandpa rambles about the usual shit

3 days ago

Mike Johnson now opposed to stock trading ban

3 days ago

Family of dead Colombian fisherman files complaint against US

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Markwayne alleges Obama war crime to defend Hegseth war crime

3 days ago

Massachusetts man’s browser history consistent with defense that he didn’t murder wife, only carved up and disposed of her corpse

3 days ago

Chickenshit Jim Jordan subpoenas Jack Smith for closed depo

3 days ago

Benny Johnson wants Omar deported for badmouthing the elderly

3 days ago

Orange Idiot pardons sitting Dem Congressman Henry Cuellar

3 days ago

Surprise! Johnson to swear Van Epps in this week

3 days ago

MAGA Senator suddenly real ignorant about drug cartels

3 days ago

DHS invades New Orleans

4 days ago

ADP jobs report pretty ugly

4 days ago

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