Ultra charismatic and affable former First Lady Melania Trump told Fox News in a Thursday interview that during the Capitol insurrection she was unaware of the violence as she was busy having her carpet photographed – and yeah the joke is just way too fucking easy but go ahead and make it in the comments below, who are we to say you can’t write it here. Have at it.
“On January 6, 2021, I was fulfilling one of my duties as First Lady of the United States of America, and accordingly, I was unaware of what was simultaneously transpiring at the U.S. Capitol Building,” Melania said, adding “As with all First Ladies who preceded me, it was my obligation to record the contents of the White House’s historic rooms, including taking archival photographs of all the renovations,” which, per the Guardian’s Hugo Lowell, was mostly pics of a new carpet.
As for her former Chief of Staff, Steph Grisham, who last month tweeted a screenshot of a text exchange in which Melania simply replied “No” when asked if she would condemn the violence (Grisham resigned later that day), the former illegal immigrant turned First Lady said “Ms. Grisham was not in the White House on January 6, and her behavior in her role as Chief of Staff ultimately amounts to dereliction of duty,” adding, “traditionally, the First Lady’s Chief of Staff provides detailed briefings surrounding our Nation’s important issues,” which Grisham in fact did that day.