There’s an absolute shit ton of news to get caught up on this morning, requiring a consolidation better than that lame and unserious rundown from Monday. Alright ramblers, let’s get ramblin’:
Fat former President Trump is planning to return to Twitter following Elon Musk’s reinstatement of his account and is working on ideas for his big first new tweet in two years, NBC News reports.
The batshit House GOP plan to abolish the IRS and replace income tax with a national sales tax was reportedly a condition of the Freedom Caucasians’ support for Kevin McCarthy’s speakership, a plan so bad even Conservative anti-tax nerd Grover Norquist said “This is a political gift to Biden and the Democrats. I think that this is the first significant problem created for the Republican Party by the 20 people who thought that there was no downside to the approach they took.”
The Manhattan DA is looking seriously at prosecuting fat former President Trump over the 2016 Stormy Daniels hush money payment, the New York Times reports. The statute of limitations has been tolled due to COVID and continues to toll every minute Trump is not in the state of New York, so prosecutors can take their time building the case, according to the Daily Beast’s Joe Pagliery.
Ronna Not-Romney claims she has the votes to secure her fourth term as RNC chair over MAGA lawyer Harmeet Dhillon and allegedly former crackhead Mike Lindell. So confident is Ronna that she’s skipping a debate with Lindell and Dhillon, a choice you will not be surprised to learn came just months after Ronna criticized now-Arizona Gov Katie Hobbs for refusing to debate Kari Lake.
On a very related note, the RNC is in talks with networks about a 2024 primary debate schedule for this summer, even asking CNN if they want to host one of the guaranteed shitshows.
The Chicago Department of Sanitation announced 50 finalists for its snowplow naming contest, the six highest vote-getters will be dedicated with names such as “Sleet Home Chicago,” “Sears Plower,” “Chicago Style Plowza,” and “Mrs. O’Leary’s Plow.” That last one has to win.