Categories
Uncategorized

Oklahoma City wildlife removal contractor says he’s hot on the trail of massive python that keeps eating trailer park’s stray cats

An Oklahoma City wildlife removal contractor tells KFOR he’s closing in on the 13-foot python that for five months has been feasting on mammals in the Burntwood Mobile Home Park.

“We’re talking, that thing has been eating opossums, foot-long rats, and cats,” said Red Beard Wildlife Control’s Trevor Bounds. “The mouth on that thing is the size of your foot and when it opens up you’re going to be able to fit something pretty large in there,” Bounds continued, saying he was worried his serpentine quarry could start soon begin preying on humans too. “The constricting is what can be the dangerous part. You can’t have small children or pets going near this thing that’s why this should’ve been tackled a whole lot sooner. Things could have gotten much worse.”

Bounds has only been on the job since Friday but already he’s learned a thing or two about how to track down the monster reptile. “We were using our thermal camera last week to find it but because it is cold-blooded we had to just look for an outline of him,” said Bounds, the pressure to bring the python to justice was growing. “They have an animal that large and I can imagine that each one of those cats put up a nasty fight. So, when it’s been attacked that many times and to that extent, the nice non-aggressive pet snake we once knew is no more. This thing is dangerous now.”

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Surprise! Trump made that jealous former president shit up

2 hours ago

MAGA Georgia town shuts off would-be ICE gulag’s water

3 hours ago

Mark Penn feels like the media is rooting for Iran

4 hours ago

More demented rambling: Live video

5 hours ago

Cuban electrical grid as dead as Fidel Castro

6 hours ago

Greg Bovino makes retirement official

8 hours ago

Marge shit-talks Fox News viewers, self-centered boomers on CNN

9 hours ago

Cancer-stricken nanny to continue watching destructive toddler

9 hours ago

“Oil prices will drop like a rock”

9 hours ago

Pennsylvania court rules senior discount not a thing in prison sentencing for 67 year-old violent recidivist sexual offender

10 hours ago

Tom Emmer self-soothes in safe, judgment-free media space

11 hours ago

Republican donors planning effort to make Marco Rubio seem raw and unfiltered to MAGA electorate who demand authenticity

12 hours ago

US intel indicates Ayatollah Mojtaba Khamenei secretly a gay

12 hours ago

Top regime political guru shares secret to MAGA internet success

13 hours ago

“Senior administration official” feeling just kind of helpless, adrift

13 hours ago

Oil hits $105/barrel before retreat

14 hours ago

Mentally ill social media user posts confusing rant

21 hours ago

Orange Baby really doesn’t want to talk about dead troops

1 day ago

FCC incel was at Mar-a-Lago when he threatened networks again

1 day ago

Peruvian presidential candidate veers too far left on infrastructure

1 day ago

Iranian sleeper cells may have already been arrested, fanboy posits

1 day ago

South Dakota Supreme Court upholds apocalypse survival bunker-themed gated community resident’s right to stand his ground

1 day ago

Trump orders other countries to sacrifice their sailors’ lives

2 days ago

Would-be school shooter who got elected to Congress instead has interesting ideas on the American people’s main policy priority

2 days ago

Information warfare practitioner on rear guard defense again

2 days ago

Red State first responders find out the hard way that Noem stopped paying bill for ultra-accurate tornado tracking SaaS last month

3 days ago

Movie Night Friday: A Bridge Too Far

3 days ago

WOW! DEAL ALERT! Get 80 percent OFF citizenship renunciation processing fees! HURRY! This deal will last, but hurry anyway!

3 days ago

Gateway Pundit reports Iran regime has some redeeming qualities

3 days ago

Dick Grenell fired, replaced by some other douche at JFK Center

3 days ago

Judge nukes DOJ subpoenas to Jerome Powell

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Jaydee makes rare public appearance

3 days ago

Handcuffs no match for mentally ill Florida man strength

3 days ago

Your taxes went toward advertising episode of shitty podcast

3 days ago

Ken Paxton buys TV ad time in West Palm Beach, Florida

3 days ago

Marine Expeditionary unit headed to Middle East

3 days ago

RonAnon assured that Ayatollah would’ve killed those girls anyway

3 days ago

All six USAF refueler crew members confirmed dead

3 days ago

Admiral Yamadildo claims Navy to escort Hormuz ships if “needed”

3 days ago

Revised Q4 2025 GDP numbers now 0.7 percent shittier

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Midlife crisis sufferer compensates to media again

4 days ago

Pennsylvania cops call off search for arrest warrant subject

4 days ago

Fat Hitler tells G7 that Iran is “about to surrender”

4 days ago

Fox News AI evidently incapable of fixing hideous neck-gina

4 days ago

Four US Air Force refueler crew dead after collision over Iraq

4 days ago

Retired Air Force general’s wife oddly cavalier on his disappearance

4 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with being reminded he has constituents

4 days ago

US aircraft patriotically collide over Iraqi airspace

4 days ago

Wing Guru founder not exactly a tax evasion guru

4 days ago

Dow closes only down 740 points on the day, oil not at $100 yet

4 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x