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Low Energy Greg to go skydiving with 106 year-old Texan

Texas Gov Greg Abbott on Monday morning will be jumping out of a plane over San Marcos alongside 106 year-old retiree Al Blaschke, the Texas Tribune’s Patrick Svitek reports.

Blaschke appears to be something of a pro at skydiving, having jumped at least twice over the last several years, starting on his 100th birthday in 2017. So he probably knows what he’s doing.

Does Abbott? It’s one thing to be 106 and able-bodied enough to jump out of a plane but… Well, we’ve gotten in trouble before for mocking Abbott’s disability even if strictly in juxtaposition with his reputation as an especially cruel and megalomaniacal leader of the Lone Star state. So let’s just say it would be tragic if whichever pro skydiver to whom Abbott will be strapped plummeted to his death too after fucking something up whilst packing their parachutes. We’d be sad to hear about that.

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