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Texas telecom workers strike big, finding vast hidden water source

EUREKA! A crew of telecom workers digging for line repairs made it big on Monday, striking into a massive new source of fresh clean water, sending a geyser dramatically up 50 feet into the air!

“YEEHAW! I dun tell ya there was water here, Colton! WE’RE H2O RICH NAW BOYS!” the crew would have said while hugging each other and waving their hats jubilantly if it was some kind of thrilling new discovery and not them fucking up a job. Specifically the Fort Worth Star-Telegram reports that the crew with an unnamed “major telecommunications company” had put in a request to the city water department asking them for the maps of where the pipes were so they didn’t accidentally strike them while working on the fiber optic cables or whatever they were trying to get to.

The city had responded by telling them to hold off on the work but they went ahead and started the job anyway, leading to the massive jet of high pressure water soaking nearby homes and cutting off the service to at least 20 of them. Officials expect service to be restored by this evening.

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