Categories
Uncategorized

Former Zambian lawmaker’s associates arrested in total witch hunt

IT’S A TOTAL WITCH HUNT! Zambian President Hakainde Hichilema’s regime have arrested two men allegedly hired by Nelson Banda, the younger brother of fugitive lawmaker Jay Banda, on charges practicing witchcraft, possession of charms, and cruelty to animals in rituals meant to cast a dark spell over Hichilema, the Associated Press reports on a third world politically biased investigation.

Suspects Jasten Mabulesse Candunde, 42, and Leonard Phiri, 43, “were found in possession of assorted charms, including a live chameleon, and are alleged to be practicing witch doctors,” said Zambian Federal Police spokesman Rae Hamoonga, adding that their purported mission “was to use charms to harm the Head of State, His Excellency President Hakainde Hichilema.”

In all seriousness Hichilema has put up with a lot of bullshit since taking office in 2021, mostly led by his corrupt predecessor, Edgar Lungu. Not saying the Hichilema’s definitely a saint, he could be just as corrupt and/or despotic, but if you judge him solely by his enemies – and the fact that these clowns were resorting to fucking witchcraft to take him down – well maybe he is a good leader.

Though if he wants to take the country forward then maybe he should order prosecutors to drop the witchcraft charges and stick solely to the cruelty to animals rap. Don’t take that shit seriously.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Saudi arrested in vehicle attack an anti-Muslim, pro-AfD turncoat

4 hours ago

Movie night Friday: Edge of Tomorrow

13 hours ago

Vice President-Elect Trump fucking pissed

15 hours ago

House defies Elon Musk, passes funding bill

17 hours ago

Yeah, this is “Over the target”

18 hours ago

Former Zambian lawmaker’s associates arrested in total witch hunt

18 hours ago

HR Enough of This Shit drops

18 hours ago

Team Incel getting fired up again

19 hours ago

Scores injured in vehicular attack on German Christmas market

20 hours ago

Party City closing down, recently canceled vendor confab out of worry that suppliers owed money were safety threat to team

21 hours ago

MAGA Land confident haters just jealous

23 hours ago

ISIS leader killed right before Christmas

1 day ago

WATCH LIVE: Blank screen for US House proceedings

1 day ago

Rare calendar alignment deprives Jews of Chinese food Christmas

1 day ago

Musk’s top assistant endorses shutdown

1 day ago

President-Elect hails Fourth Reich Party as savior of Germany

1 day ago

Team Orange considering just letting a shutdown happen

1 day ago

Orange Fuhrer threatens Europe for no particular reason

1 day ago

Foolish mortal questions Elon Musk’s omnipotence

2 days ago

Josh Duggar pissing away family money in prison: report

2 days ago

First vote on government funding fails

2 days ago

Ketamine Brain retweeted this

2 days ago

Orange Warlord snaps at “Colonel Sanders”

2 days ago

FAA imposes no drone-zone over large areas of New Jersey

2 days ago

Luigi Mangione hit with federal charges

2 days ago

“This is exactly what the American people voted for”

2 days ago

Fluoridation no match for Floridation

2 days ago

The King of Debt calls for abolishing debt ceiling

2 days ago

“EVERYBODY WANTS TO BE MY FRIEND!!!”

2 days ago

Republican Mississippi state representative could be a little more discerning while choosing clientele for his regular day job

2 days ago

Hawaiian wildlife officials catch third opossum this year

2 days ago

Everything’s fine in the MAGAverse

2 days ago

Pornhub pulling out of Florida

3 days ago

“He’s just learning about it… He’s just reading about it”

3 days ago

Funding bill dead

3 days ago

Donald and Jaydee command Republicans to sink funding

3 days ago

Foreign oligarch declares victory over American governance

3 days ago

Newsom declares emergency over H5N1

3 days ago

Mike Johnson could get Kevin McCarthyed

3 days ago

Comer cornered into feigning concern over Trump corruption

3 days ago

Michigan man “attempted to conduct a mass killing of individuals at a political party headquarters and a nearby bar”: DOJ press release

3 days ago

Flesh-eating ground squirrels discovered in California

3 days ago

Republicans now have two maniacal overlords to answer for

3 days ago

New app lets homebuyers see neighbors’ politics

3 days ago

House Ethics votes to release Gaetz report

3 days ago

Co-president vetoes government funding

3 days ago

Ghana Supreme Court greenlights “Don’t Be Gay” bill

3 days ago

“My Tennessee property is a drone-free zone”

3 days ago

Fat idiot still won’t let this Canada annexation thing go

3 days ago

Indiana man crossed off state’s naughty list

3 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x