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Orange Yahweh commands Israeli president to pardon Netanyahu

Convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday sent a letter to Israeli President Isaac Herzog commanding him to pardon dictator Benjamin Netanyahu, who currently faces trial on charges of bribery, fraud and breach of trust, Bloomberg reports on a bold move to help make Thanksgiving dinner and Christmas presents more affordable for millions of Americans this holiday season.

“I hereby call on you to fully pardon Benjamin Netanyahu, who has been a formidable and decisive War Time Prime Minister, Netanyahu has stood tall for Israel in the face of strong adversaries and long odds, and his attention cannot be unnecessarily diverted,” Trump wrote in the letter and God knows how much Miriam Adelson kicked in to the ballroom to get him to send that bullshit.

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