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Orange Antichrist to add signature to all US currency

Convicted felon President Trump, a false messiah warned about repeatedly in the Book of Revelation, seems determined to fulfill the prophecy of 13:17 in which “None may buy or sell without the mark” by ordering his signature affixed to all American currency, Vanity Fair reports.

“As the 250th anniversary of our great nation approaches, American currency will continue to stand as a symbol of prosperity, strength, and the unshakable spirit of the American people under President Trump’s leadership,” said US Treasurer Brandon Beach, confirming the plan. “The president’s mark on history as the architect of America’s golden age economic revival is undeniable.”

“Printing his signature on the American currency is not only appropriate, but also well deserved.”

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