Categories
Uncategorized

President declares the American people “angry” with “seriously unfunny” Jimmy Kimmel, stresses urgency for ABC to fire him

Without actually pointing to any significant general public outcry agitating for the immediate removal of the late night host, the President of the United States on Thursday nevertheless insisted it was currently erupting forcefully, posting “When is ABC Fake News Network firing seriously unfunny Jimmy Kimmel, who incompetently presides over one of the Lowest Rated shows on Television?”

“People are angry. It better be soon!!!” the President concluded, implying consequences for the national television network and its corporate parent despite his lieutenants already having initiated a lengthy, complex, litigious, and far from guaranteed-to-be-successful challenge to the broadcast licenses of the television affiliates that air Kimmel’s show… Six days after the host simply joked that a nearly 80 year-old man in ever-increasingly grave physical and mental health is likely to die soon.

The president then expressed futher frustrations with legislative friction in a subsequent post, writing “How much abuse can the Republican Senate take from the Radical Left Lunatics in the form of Democrat Senators, before they BLOW UP (TERMINATE!) THE FILIBUSTER, and approve things at a record clip, including The Save America Act, that would be unthinkable without the Filibuster Termination??? The Dems will do it on the first hour of their first day. DO NOT BE STUPID!!!”

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Fuhrerbunker rant decidedly more unhinged than previous one

3 hours ago

Maryland kids exposed to rabies after playing with sickened bat

5 hours ago

Fox News still has yet to report she lost

8 hours ago

ICE buying electrified gloves to zap victims on demand

16 hours ago

Please remember this meaningless bullshit in November

20 hours ago

RNC finds roles for those too violent, unstable for ICE employment

1 day ago

Team Orange batting the subpoena hatches down hard

1 day ago

TMTG posts negative $238 million earnings in Q2 2026

1 day ago

Cowardly bitch-ass president flew out of Turkey on decoy plane

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump uncures childhood diseases

2 days ago

Orange God Emperor demands Iran pay him reparations

2 days ago

Colombia hit with 7.4-magnitude earthquake, killing at least 20

2 days ago

Fox couchman almost mad at reporter for bringing the bad news

2 days ago

Hormuz never returning to pre-war condition: Iranian MP

2 days ago

“Black and Brown Voters” expert shares inside analysis on demo

3 days ago

Max Miller stuck on the ballot

3 days ago

Netanyahu says “no, fuck no” to Trump’s Hamas “peace plan”

3 days ago

Fox News reports WNBA controversy consuming Fox News

3 days ago

“Man, he’s destroying families”: Trump fanboy with fiancee in gulag

4 days ago

Strait closed until Orange Ayatollah agrees to demands: Iranians

4 days ago

Judge orders MAGA Virginians to re-rename Confederate schools

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Robber Barons praise their Orange Cash Cow

5 days ago

Princess Donald cries over his magical ballroom’s disappearance

5 days ago

Bitch Cassidy and the Sunsetting Career

5 days ago

White House economic wiener retcons July jobs report

5 days ago

July jobs report smashes expectations

5 days ago

Murkowski a no on Todd Blanche

5 days ago

Orange Fuhrer refuses to endorse John Thune for Senate leader

5 days ago

Andy Ogles loses primary

5 days ago

Jon Husted’s wife or someone finally told him to man the fuck up

6 days ago

Fat president still screaming about “fake news” and shit

6 days ago

“How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents” by Thom Tillis

6 days ago

Beaver attacks prompt closure of Maryland state park waterways

6 days ago

Bunnygate scandal continues to engulf Miller campaign

6 days ago

Enraged Fuhrer vows “treasonous” leakers being “hunted down”

6 days ago

Failed casino owner shares business wisdom in Vegas: Live

7 days ago

Jon Husted has no opinion on Max Miller

7 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Todd and K$H’s Excellent Press Conference

1 week ago

Fox News-brained senior citizen actually constitutionally empowered to follow through on his bullshit rants, doesn’t

1 week ago

Patriot arrested outside of Trump’s California golf course

1 week ago

DCCC adds another 12 seats to target list

1 week ago

Chuck Edwards throws in the towel after Ethics finding

1 week ago

Axios “reality checks” Trump’s “golden age”

1 week ago

Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan Dem Senate nomination

1 week ago

Stuffed toy bunny hostage situation, other matters, unresolved

1 week ago

Minnesota MAGA Congressman hints Tom Emmer possibly dying

1 week ago

Box-o-Wine brought evidence to White House

1 week ago

Max Miller asks House Ethics to investigate him

1 week ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump defense lawyer confirmation hearing

1 week ago

David Ellison bitches about antitrust lawsuits in NYT op-ed

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x