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Ken Paxton commands UNT to expel apostates of St Charles

“Attorney General Ken Paxton is investigating the University of North Texas (‘UNT’) for still refusing to take disciplinary action against the radical students who celebrated the political assassination of national hero Charlie Kirk and who have threatened violent acts against students. Attorney General Paxton previously sent a letter to UNT regarding left-wing extremism and demanded answers from the university, but school leadership’s response so far has been abysmal and real action has been non-existent. As part of the investigation, Attorney General Paxton sent a follow-up letter to UNT President Harrison Keller demanding answers as to why UNT is refusing to hold bad actors accountable even as other universities and colleges have taken appropriate action in comparable circumstances,” writes Picasso-face’s office in another insufferably histrionic press release.

“‘In the face of left-wing terror being celebrated and the threatening of students, UNT leadership has chosen to do next to nothing. That’s outrageous,’ said Attorney General Paxton. ‘Thus far, there has been zero school officials fired, zero students expelled, and zero accountability from UNT as the campus is overrun by left-wing extremists violently threatening anyone who disagrees with them. I will continue to investigate this matter and use the full weight of this office to stop this madness.'”

“Following the martyrdom of Charlie Kirk, self-identified ‘militant’ student groups on UNT’s campus have increasingly used violent rhetoric against other students and conservatives. Marxists and Antifa-aligned organizations have been spreading their materials and their violent messages all across the university, according to media reports. Video footage posted to social media by Representative Andy Hopper also showed a radical student approaching a Turning Point USA table and shredding the group’s materials. Similar to the school’s response to other forms of left-wing extremism from students, UNT has chosen to do nothing in ­the face of these incidents.”

In conclusion, Ken Paxton is the word accidentally depicted on a now-discontinued UNT coffee mug.

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