In a Thursday morning story headlined “Texas Governor Greg Abbott Vows to Slap ‘100 percent Tariff’ on Anyone Moving from NYC After Radical Socialist Takes the Throne in Mayoral Election” the Gateway Pundit writes that “Texas Governor Greg Abbott has declared war on the incoming wave of New York City ‘refugees’ desperate to escape the impending socialist nightmare under newly elected Mayor Zohran Mamdani. On the eve of NYC’s mayoral election, Abbott took to X to announce he’d impose a staggering 100 percent tariff on anyone daring to cross state lines from the Big Apple to the Lone Star State after polls closed. ‘After the polls close tomorrow night, I will impose a 100 percent tariff on anyone moving to Texas from NYC,’ the governor wrote on X.”

Not even sure what, if anything to add here given the level of derangement. Like if the headline had said “Texas Governor Greg Abbott Hilariously Trolls Marxists, Vows to Slap ‘100 percent Tariff’ on Anyone Moving from NYC After Radical Socialist Takes the Throne in Mayoral Election,” then okay.

That would be “accurate.” Even the subjective elements of that addition to the headline would still be far more tethered to reality than its current composition. Like forget about the constitution and early federalist precedent which you don’t even need to actually check here and just focus on the practicality of a “tariff” on people moving from one state to another. Actually forget even that and ask why the fuck Abbott would NOT want conservative New Yorkers to move to Texas and further entrench his regime’s political dominance. There are so many different dimensions to how dumb and bizarre of a “joke” it was and still the Gateway Pundit team’s brains are as functional as Abbott’s legs when it came to comprehending that he did not mean for anyone to take him seriously.