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ICE held five year-old autistic girl hostage to get dad to surrender

ICE agents in the town of Leominster, Massachusetts last Tuesday held a five year-old girl with autism hostage outside of a home last week to get her father to come out and surrender, NBC News reports citing video of the horrific incident obtained by Telemundo Nueva Inglaterra.

Guatemalan-born Eduardo Hip was driving home with his daughter when he called his wife – who asked that she not be named in interviews with Spanish-language media – to tell her that he thought he was being followed. He made it home then “managed to run back into the parking lot of my house, but they grabbed” their daughter, she added. The girl was sat down next to an SUV and given a bottle of water while Hip negotiated with them from behind his door, handing them his ID for a few minutes until local cops then arrived and took the girl inside the home. ICE then left.

They returned two days later and arrested Hip, who has two kids and has lived in the US for 22 years, but let’s hear more about how “family-oriented” undocumented people would be left alone.

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Orange Overlord backs out of meeting with top Dems

“After reviewing the details of the unserious and ridiculous demands being made by the Minority Radical Left Democrats in return for their Votes to keep our thriving Country open, I have decided that no meeting with their Congressional Leaders could possibly be productive. They are threatening to shut down the Government of the United States unless they can have over $1 Trillion Dollars in new spending to continue free healthcare for Illegal Aliens (A monumental cost!), force Taxpayers to fund Transgender surgery for minors, have dead people on the Medicaid roles, allow Illegal Alien Criminals to steal Billions of Dollars in American Taxpayer Benefits, try to force our Country to again open our Borders to Criminals and to the World, allow men to play in women’s sports, and essentially create Transgender operations for everybody,” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday in an unhinged, lie-filled rant that goes on considerably longer.

One lowlight worth pointing out in the 431-word shriek is the “They are trying to eliminate the popular $50 Billion Dollar Rural and Vulnerable Hospital Fund, which was passed with only Republican Votes, and proudly signed into Law by ME,” which is likely true in the narrowest sense that the Dems want to kill it because it’s only necessary due to the Medicaid cuts the fat fuck signed into law, the very reason the Democrats are threatening to shut down the government.

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Florida man arrested for torching synagogue

A 31 year-old Florida man whose mother and aunt told cops he “has a hatred toward homosexuals and Jewish people that’s become worse over the past years” has been arrested in connection with a Friday night arson incident at Chabad of Charlotte County in Punta Gorda, Fox4Now reports.

Stay-at-home son Blake Hoover, an unaffiliated voter, was confronted over the phone by his mom Kelly, a registered Republican, who noticed that a gas can and some spray paint were missing from their garage on the night of the fire. She called and begged him not to burn anything down.

According to police, the next morning she asked what he’d been up to the previous night, to which Blake said he had”just sprayed the letter J, not a big deal.” Kelly told cops that Blake always refers to Jewish people as “Js.” Blake, being held on a $25,000 bond on suspicion of arson and criminal mischief, is due in court for an initial appearance on Tuesday. Probably not Antifa.

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Secret Service busts cellular DDoS network ahead of UN meet

US Secret Service agents in New York City on Tuesday busted a network of devices that could potentially have crashed all cell phone service during the UN General Assembly, the AP reports.

“It can’t be understated what this system is capable of doing,” said Matt McCool, the special agent in charge of the Secret Service’s New York field office. “It can take down cell towers, so then no longer can people communicate, right? …. You can’t text message, you can’t use your cell phone.”

“And if you coupled that with some sort of other event associated with UNGA, you know, use your imagination there, it could be catastrophic to the city,” McCool continued in his statement.

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Judge rules Reese’s Halloween candy shapes spooky enough

Two Florida men’s lawsuit against the Hershey’s candy company alleging that the lumpy shapes of Reese’s Peanut Butter Pumpkins not matching the “cool looking carving of a pumpkin’s mouth and eyes as pictured on the product packaging” somehow constituted fraud or something was tossed by a federal judge on Friday, Reuters reports. “Put simply, plaintiffs do not allege that the products were unfit for consumption, did not taste as plaintiffs expected, or otherwise were so flawed as to render them worthless,” wrote Judge Melissa Damian as she spiked the complaint seeking $5 million.

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Canadian Football League officials moving the goalposts

“The Canadian Football League (CFL) is making a bold move to evolve the game with a set of changes centred upon entertainment and innovation. At a media conference, Commissioner Stewart Johnston announced that changes will be instituted over the next two seasons through a phased approach. The most significant modifications will come in 2027 with goalposts being moved to the back of the end zone and the field being re-sized. In anticipation of these structural changes, beginning in 2026, the rouge will be modified and adjustments will be introduced to ensure more consistent game flow,” says a statement from the Canadian Football League’s leadership.

Ahhhh, there it is. One of those grating idioms all too common in political media – especially in this fucked-up era – being used to describe something literally even if it’s kind of a stretch outside the usual beat of this site. The Canadian Football League’s moving the goalposts. For real.

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Disney uncancels Jimmy Kimmel’s show

“Last Wednesday, we made the decision to suspend production on the show to avoid further inflaming a tense situation at an emotional moment for our country. It is a decision we made because we felt some of the comments were ill-timed and thus insensitive. We have spent the last days having thoughtful conversations with Jimmy, and after those conversations, we reached the decision to return the show on Tuesday,” said Disney/ABC in a statement on Monday.

Wow. Trump and his fanboys are going to have an even bigger shit fit after this one.

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Treasury sanctions Brazilian Justice De Moraes’s wife

“Today, the US Department of the Treasury’s Office of Foreign Assets Control (OFAC) is sanctioning the Lex Instituto de Estudos Juridicos LTDA (Lex Institute) for its support to Brazilian Supreme Federal Court (STF) justice Alexandre de Moraes (de Moraes). De Moraes was designated by OFAC on July 30, 2025, for using his position to authorize arbitrary pre-trial detentions and suppress freedom of expression in Brazil. Also designated today is Viviane Barci de Moraes (Viviane), de Moraes’ wife, who serves as the head of the Lex Institute,” says a US Treasury press release.

“‘Alexandre de Moraes is responsible for an oppressive campaign of censorship, arbitrary detentions, and politicized prosecutions – including against former President Jair Bolsonaro,’ said Secretary of the Treasury Scott Bessent. ‘Today’s action makes clear that Treasury will continue to target individuals who provide material support to de Moraes as he abuses human rights.’ Today’s action is being taken pursuant to Executive Order (EO) 13818, which builds upon and implements the Global Magnitsky Human Rights Accountability Act and targets perpetrators of serious human rights abuse around the world,” the press release continued and now’s a good time to remind readers Bolsonaro literally plotted to kill Alexandre De Moraes after he lost his reelection bid to Luiz Lula in 2022.

Also this is why your coffee’s expensive. Because Trump has a hard-on for Lula and De Moraes.

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You’ll never guess what kind of internet porn anti-trans MAGA Republican Wisconsin gubernatorial candidate Bill Berrien is into

Hint: Former Navy SEAL and CEO of some industrial concern you’ve never heard of Bill Berrien’s campaign ads in the Wisconsin GOP gubernatorial primary feature him saying “take it from a dad and a coach, I will keep boys out of our daughters’ sports and locker rooms,” while another praises convicted felon President Trump for “protecting our daughters’ sports” from trans athletes.

This is a tough one. You’re going to have to think really hard here, even with that hint.

YES! It’s trans porn! The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel tracked down Berrien’s account on blogging platform Medium and found that, among others, the family values conservative follows a performer named “Jiz Lee,” lol. The Journal-Sentinel goes on to mention that Berrien also follows Octavio Morrison, author of posts headlined “7 Types of Orgasmic Sensations” and “3 Terrible Reasons to Have a Threesome” and Emma Austin, who calls herself “a wholesome perv with a touch of whimsy” and posted items such as “Pegging is A-OK,” and “I Love Getting Jackhammered.”

“Not your typical men’s health magazine headlines,” the Journal-Sentinel notes dryly.

Berrien also upvoted posts headlined “My Husband Loves Watching Me Flirt With Another Man” and a post by Lee, self-billed as a “queer, trans, non-binary adult performer,” on “ethical porn.” The MAGA Republican’s campaign claims that Berrien had no idea Lee is trans. Guess it isn’t “fake news.”

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Would-be Trump assassin’s defense lasts like an hour or two

Ryan Routh, the self-represented defendant in last year’s second major assassination attempt against convicted felon President Trump, rested his case after calling three witnesses Monday morning, two of whom testified to his character and the third a firearms expert who ABC News reports had difficulty following Routh’s line of questioning about whether the gun – a Chinese knockoff of an AK-47 – would’ve actually been able to hit Trump from Routh’s position.

The case will now go to closing arguments after which Routh will in all likelihood be convicted and then personally executed by Judge Aileen Cannon in the courtroom, possibly Saudi Arabian style.

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Mamdani pulls out of ABC town hall after Kimmel cancelation

Leftist New York City all-but-Mayor-Elect Zohran Mamdani will pull out of a Thursday night town hall event hosted by New York City’s Disney-owned ABC affiliate WABC in protest of the mega-corporation’s caving to the Trump Reich by canceling Jimmy Kimmel’s show, AMNewYork reports.

“ABC pulled Jimmy Kimmel off the air after the FCC sought to pressure them. The message that it sends to each and every American across this country is a message the First Amendment is no longer a right that can be counted on, but rather that it is government which will determine what should and should not be discussed, what can and cannot be spoken. And we cannot normalize these kinds of acts nor offenses. These must be the basis upon which we act,” said Mamdani.

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Nancy Mace being awfully circumspect with Cory Mills

Circumspect by Mace’s standards. The tweet inside the tweet is Mills defending himself in direct response to Mace’s campaign of online harassment against him apparently started when he voted against her censure of Ilhan Omar because Mills himself was facing censure. What’s interesting though is how Crazy Nancy’s raging at her fellow Republican for valor theft – which of course should be disqualifying but it’s muddy and in any case is kind of the least of among his sins – and not her raison d’etre like abuse of women and revenge porn. Almost like she doesn’t want to kick up too much dust and “start a conversation” that could, you know, make her Dear Leader look bad.

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“The first step is that Eric Adams has to get the fuck out of this race”

Former Obama campaign pollster Cornell Belcher, who recently joined disgraced former Governor Andrew Cuomo’s all-but doomed mayoral bid tells New York Magazine that there is a path for Cuomo to win. Not a big one. “I am not going to blow smoke. It is a narrow path,” said Belcher, whose nickname could be Corn Belcher, adding “But I haven’t worked for a candidate in the past decade who didn’t have a narrow path to victory,” but not naming which ones actually won.

“There is very much a path here for us,” another Cuomo minion said. “But the first step is that Eric Adams has to get the fuck out of this race.” Referencing Adams’ constant back-and-forth, New York Magazine dryly notes that “It doesn’t help that the Cuomo campaign’s multipronged approach rests on something happening that keeps not happening, despite constant rumors that it might.”

The rest of the plan goes that it’ll bring in a shit ton of money because donors will see a non-Zohran Mamdani candidate as more viable and then something something the MAGA people will turn against Curtis Sliwa because he and convicted felon President Trump don’t really like each other.

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Moonies leader facing arrest in South Korea bribery investigation

The consequences for ousted former South Korean President Yoon Suk-Yeol’s fucking stupid December 2024 decision to impose martial law based on some bullshit he saw on YouTube continued to reverberate Monday as Han Hak-ja, the 82 year-old widow of the country’s very culty Church of the Unification – aka the Moonies – faces the clink in an investigation into allegations she bribed Yoon’s wife, now-jailed Kim Keon Hee, with handbags and jewelry, Reuters reports.

Han, called “True Mother” by followers, was married to Unification Church founder Moon Sun-Myung until his death in 2012. The Moonies’ tentacles reach deep into right wing parties across the globe, most notably in the US where their hardcore MAGA gun fetishist local branch run by one of Moon’s sons is called the Church of the Iron Rod and in Japan where former Prime Minister Shinzo Abe was blown away with a homemade shotgun in 2022 by a man who blamed Abe’s thrall to the Moonies for his mother’s financial ruin to the cult’s extortionate tithing, leading to their dissolution by Tokyo.

Nowhere else is that less true than in their home country and as such South Korean President Lee Jae-Myung might want to tread carefully when dealing with the leader of a cult whose adherents number in the millions – especially when that leader is a frail 82 year-old woman who showed up to court in a wheelchair. You don’t need to be in a cult to at least recognize those sort of optics can be risky. Then there’s that the Iron Rod church sent at least 80 of theirs to the Capitol on January 6th, 2021. Who knows what they’re going to do in South Korea if their “True Mother” is locked up? Lee should be looking at how the Japanese government wiped the Moonies out systematically as his model instead of parading an old lady’s scalp over some chickenshit bribery charges.

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Singapore to execute someone’s guy on Thursday

Singaporean officials on Sunday announced that they’re going to hang someone’s guy on Thursday, the South China Morning Post reports. The guy, who was able to get heroin and other stuff if you had his number, stopped dealing in 2011 because the cops found him with 45 grams of the shit.

Someone’s friend’s cousin Datchinamurthy Kataiah, 39, will be the tenth convict taken to the gallows at Changi Prison in the southeast Asian city-state year-to-date 2025, the eighth for drugs.

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