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As they are wont to do, Politico Playbook tried to be gentle when reviewing convicted felon President Trump’s panicky, lie-filled Wednesday night speech, writing ” It wasn’t his best performance, the ticking clock seeming to play on the president’s mind. He rushed through it. As a result, he came across a little shouty, and the whole thing lacked the humor and the charm Trump can offer up at his best… More importantly, this was still just a concise version of the half-angry, half-triumphant message Trump has given us through the second half of this year.”

“There was little empathy that things are really hard right now for millions of Americans and no plea to stick with him through the tough times while he finishes the job. If this is the best Trump can muster, he’d better hope the economy picks up fast in 2026,” they continued.

The thing with “cringe” is that it isn’t exactly new to on-screen comedic productions in the 21st century. Social awkwardness, self-unawareness, faux pas, and so on have always been staples to getting laughs out of audiences. But like “gross-out,” “slapstick,” “frat house,” and so on, “cringe comedy” became the term for the quasi-subgenre in recent decades largely thanks to Steve Carrell’s iconic character Michael Scott from NBC’s The Office. He REALLY made scenes simply agonizingly uncomfortable to sit through, his “best” moments on par with the worst in horror films.

One might wonder if at some point over the last few days that the concept crossed the mind of actor/comedian Bill Hader following his experience at Conan O’Brien’s Christmas party on Saturday night. Separate reporting from the Wall Street Journal, Entertainment Weekly, and the Hollywood Reporter together paint a pretty cringey picture of a 32 year-old man being dragged to the party by his parents who could not leave him home alone that night. The man, Nick Reiner, was not invited but O’Brien kindly accommodated his parents, Rob and Michele Reiner, when they asked if they could bring him. O’Brien didn’t really announce it though, and the A-listers present who noticed him were questioning whether the 6 ft 3, 320 lbs Nick had simply wandered in off the street somehow.

Then things got cringier. Nick wandered around the party, asking guests – some of whom he’d already been introduced to – their names and if they were “famous.” Yet it wasn’t cringey enough for Nick who then approached Hader as the comedian was chatting with another guest, asking him the same question. Hader then calmly told Nick that it was a private conversation he’d been interrupting, to which the deranged failson stared silently and menacingly at Hader for a cringey amount of time.

The Trump Regime has ordered USCIS to “supply Office of Immigration Litigation with 100-200 denaturalization cases per month” in 2026 as part of a test plan to fuck over immigrants at will, the New York Times reports on more of Stephen Miller’s small dick energy.

Jeffrey Epstein friend/client Alan Dershowitz tells the Wall Street Journal that on Tuesday he met with other Jeffrey Epstein friend/client Donald Trump at the White House and showed the president a draft of Dersh’s upcoming book “Could President Trump Constitutionally Serve a Third Term?” as though the fat fuck would actually have the attention span necessary to read such a tome.

“I said ‘it’s not clear if a president can become a third term president and it’s not clear if it’s permissible,’” said OJ Simpson’s former defense lawyer, adding “He found it interesting as an intellectual issue. Do I think he’s going to run for a third term? No, I don’t think he will.”

Dersh did not then elaborate on what the fucking point was of writing this stupid book, set to hit stores next year, is if it’s not just some bullshit aimed at suckering MAGA idiots for a few bucks.

TECH TRAP: Former Texas teacher Matthan Lough is charged with grooming a 17-year-old after investigators say they found an AI-generated “manipulation plan” outlining steps to control his victim.https://t.co/InuAFoBbsp

— Fox News (@FoxNews) December 17, 2025

“Raphael Warnock was on Meet the Fake Press with a one sided and very biased Kristen Welker as the Host(ess!). Warnock spent the entire show using Religion to try and divide the Country! If a Republican, in particular ME, made those statements, it would be FRONT PAGE NEWS. He ended by saying that he was going to his Church to preach now, and while I think that’s fine, I do say, ‘What ever happened to separation of Church and State?’ That would be the first thing they would use against us but, actually, it’s something that never much bothered me. Anyway, Warnock is a LIGHTWEIGHT whose wife correctly states that he tried to run her over with a car. Fortunately, she was able to get out of the way, and only almost lost her foot. Warnock is a bad guy, and NBC News, which is second only to ABC Fake News for being the worst, should be ashamed of themselves in allowing garbage ‘interviews’ with untalented and uncaring people to take place.”

“The Public airwaves, which these Networks are using at no charge, should not be allowed to get away with this any longer! They should be properly licensed, and pay significant amounts of money for using this very valuable Public space. Thank you for your attention to this matter. MAGA!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday as usual fucking stupid enough to question whether a man of the cloth can hold elected office in the United States. Republicans Senator Senator James Lankford and Congressman Tim Walberg are ordained ministers so Trump should have some layman candidates primary them if the “Church and State” thing is such a dealbreaker for him.

Then there’s the “airwaves” rant, which isn’t new. Maybe he should just stop being such a cunt.

On the question of “Who do you think is more responsible for the current state of the economy: Joe Biden or Donald Trump?” 60 percent of Republican respondents to this month’s Quinnipiac University national survey said the former, 34 percent the latter. Among independents it was 58 percent Trump to 32 percent Biden, while with Dem respondents it’s 11 to 84 percent Biden/Trump.

Then a few questions later is “Would you describe the state of the nation’s economy these days as excellent, good, not so good, or poor?” to which 8 percent of GOP voters said “Excellent” and another 56 percent said “Good,” meaning somewhere between 24 and 60 percent of ostensibly Trump-voting respondents like the economy and credit former President Joe Biden for it.

There are other ways to quantify how fucking stupid these people are. Not a lot of them however.

Speaker of the House Mike Johnson, faced with a situation that had it happened to Nancy Pelosi the media would have declared that she’s lost control of the House, insisted to reporters on Wednesday that he has not lost control of the House. He did not offer any evidence to back up this claim.

Douchebag Assistant FBI Director Dan Bongino has told associates he’s done at the bureau and will not even be back at the Hoover Building ahead of his official exit next month, MS Now reports.

The asshole will naturally go back into podcasting but of course the question is what if anything he’s actually going to say about his time as K$H Patel’s Numero Dos as well as the Trump Administration writ large. Clearly his tenure was a failure, his exit could only have happened due to disillusionment, and that becoming an outside critic of the Trump Regime could be a problematic switch when his fanatic loyalty to the Orange Tyrant was the only reason he took the job in the first place.

Yeah there’s only so much space for the headlines here and line wraps are excruciatingly painful to a certain person, so instead of a more appropriate – and perhaps more tasteful – header like “Former Harvard Medical School morgue chief sentenced to eight years for selling body parts.”

Either way, that’s what happened, per Reuters. Cedric Lodge, who managed Harvard’s morgue for over 20 years prior his 2023 arrest, having plead guilty in May to transporting stolen goods across state lines and sentenced on Tuesday to eight years in the joint. Lodge’s wife Denise got a year in the scheme in which the two had sold leftovers from donated research cadavers to people who had been buying them for who the actual hell knows what reason. Back in the old days research WAS the reason the bodies of the deceased were stolen and sold to medical schools. One shudders to think what these people were buying parts for. Simply macabre trophies to be put in jars on shelves and then otherwise left alone in some goddamned weirdo’s basement is the best case scenario here.

That was fast. Punchbowl’s Jake Sherman reports Republican Pennsylvania Congressman Ryan Mackenzie on Wednesday became the 218th signer to a discharge petition calling for a three-year “clean” extension of Obamacare premium subsidies. No gimmicks, no bullshit, no abortion restrictions, just three more years of everything that GOP leadership does not want to vote on.

South African officials on Wednesday announced the arrests of at least seven Kenyan nationals during a raid of an office rented by the US State Department to process the asylum applications of white trash Afrikaners fleeing due to the “genocide” taking place against them, the BBC reports.

The Ministry of Home Affairs’s intelligence arm had determined that the seven Kenyans “had recently entered South Africa on tourist visas and had illegally taken up work” despite “only being in possession of tourist visas, in clear violation of their conditions of entry into the country.”

Yeah this one speaks for itself and there’s no need to editorialize it – except to note this world-class piece of shade in the statement, where the ministry noted how the raid and arrests demonstrate the commitment that South Africa “shares with the United States to combating illegal immigration and visa abuse in all its forms.” Not all heroes carry guns or badges. Some work in government press offices. The only question is which one and whether Uber Eats operates in South Africa and will deliver a box of donuts with a note long enough to specify how and why they were earned.

Republican Washington Congressman Dan Newhouse, one of only two remaining of the 10 House GOP members who voted to impeach convicted felon President Trump in January 2021, will not be running for reelection next year, Punchbowl’s Jake Sherman reports.

“Warner Bros Discovery, Inc (‘Warner Bros Discovery’ or ‘WBD’) today announced that its Board of Directors (the ‘Board’) has unanimously determined that the tender offer launched by Paramount Skydance (‘PSKY’) (NASDAQ: PSKY) on December 8, 2025 is not in the best interests of WBD and its shareholders and does not meet the criteria of a ‘Superior Proposal’ under the terms of WBD’s merger agreement with Netflix announced on December 5, 2025. The Warner Bros Discovery Board unanimously reiterates its recommendation in support of the Netflix combination and recommends that WBD shareholders reject PSKY’s offer,” says a press release from Warner Discovery’s board.

“‘Following a careful evaluation of Paramount’s recently launched tender offer, the Board concluded that the offer’s value is inadequate, with significant risks and costs imposed on our shareholders,’ said Samuel A Di Piazza, Jr, Chair of the Warner Bros Discovery Board of Directors. ‘This offer once again fails to address key concerns that we have consistently communicated to Paramount throughout our extensive engagement and review of their six previous proposals. We are confident that our merger with Netflix represents superior, more certain value for our shareholders and we look forward to delivering on the compelling benefits of our combination,'” the release continued.

The fail comes less than 24 hours after Axios reported that global business/diplomacy wunderkind Jared Kushner had backed out of financing Paramount’s bid, disappointing the Warner shareholders who pined for his singular force of cunning and personality. More seriously, there’s that the stick figure’s father-in-law posted “For those people that think I am close with the new owners of CBS, please understand that 60 Minutes has treated me far worse since the so-called ‘takeover,’ than they have ever treated me before. If they are friends, I’d hate to see my enemies!” on Tuesday. Easy to imagine some of those that had been open to Paramount’s bid were thinking that MAYBE the shittier Paramount offer was a safer investment in the short/middle term given the political context…

That is until the fat bastard injected his usual screechy fucking tantrums into it.

🎥 WORLD EXCLUSIVE: Prepare to see a whole new side of First Lady Melania Trump.

A first look at 'MELANIA' — coming to a screen near you January 30, 2026.@foxandfriends @AmazonMGMStudio @MELANIATRUMP pic.twitter.com/BZkExJyx9Z

— Fox News (@FoxNews) December 17, 2025

Going to have to remember to keep a tab open to Variety or the Hollywood Reporter to keep an eye on the box office receipts for this one now that Fox News is already in payola mode – of course failing to mention that this is director Brett Ratner’s big comeback after being out of the game for the better part of a decade, owing to his years of sexual predation of women in the industry.