Categories
Uncategorized

Doomsday clock nudged again

“In 2024, humanity edged ever closer to catastrophe. Trends that have deeply concerned the Science and Security Board continued, and despite unmistakable signs of danger, national leaders and their societies have failed to do what is needed to change course. Consequently, we now move the Doomsday Clock from 90 seconds to 89 seconds to midnight – the closest it has ever been to catastrophe. Our fervent hope is that leaders will recognize the world’s existential predicament and take bold action to reduce the threats posed by nuclear weapons, climate change, and the potential misuse of biological science and a variety of emerging technologies. In setting the Clock one second closer to midnight, we send a stark signal: Because the world is already perilously close to the precipice, a move of even a single second should be taken as an indication of extreme danger and an unmistakable warning that every second of delay in reversing course increases the probability of global disaster,” say the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists in their annual “You Are Fucked” message to humanity. Just freaking put it to like five seconds already for Christ’s sake.

Categories
Uncategorized

Hegseth pulls Mark Milley’s security, orders investigation

White nationalist alcoholic Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth on Tuesday pulled former Chairman of the Joint Chiefs General Mark Milley’s personal security detail and ordered whoever is now the Pentagon’s acting Inspector General to open an investigation into Milley with the aim of demoting him from a four-star to a three-star general, Hegseth’s most recent employer reports.

“The secretary is also directing the new acting Inspector General to conduct a review board to determine if enough evidence exists for Gen Milley to be stripped of a star in retirement based on his actions to ‘undermine the chain of command’ during President Donald Trump’s first term,” Fox News writes, referring to Milley having contact with his Chinese counterparts to assure them that there would be no kamikaze declaration of World War III as the fat fuck’s power ebbed in January 2021.

Categories
Uncategorized

Heavy metal found near site of fucking righteous fire

“Thë Cöünty öf Möntërëy Hëälth Dëpärtmënt häs bëën mäde äwärë öf thë findings prësëntëd by Sän Jösë Stäte Ünivërsity’s Möss Länding Märinë Lëbörätöries (MLML) rëgärding lëvëls öf hëavy-mëtäl nänöpärticles in märsħ söils äät Elkhörn Slöügh Rësërvë. Wë äre grätefül för änd rëcögnize thë impörtänce öf thë ënvïrönmëntäl sämpling änd tëssting cöndücted by Dr Ivänö Aiëllö’s tëäm änd cöm mënd thëir dilïgënce in rëpörtïng thëir rësülts. Püblïc hëälth änd ënvïrönmëntäl säfëty rëmäin öür töp priörïtïës, änd wë äre cömmittëd to pröviding tränspärënt, sciënce-bäsëd üpdätes to thë cömmunity ääs wë ässëss thë findings in cölläbörätion with öür stäte änd fëdëräl pärttnërs,” says a press release from the Monterrey County, California Department of Health after the fucking raging fire that completely melted the Vistra Energy Moss Landing Power Plant – and the minds of those who witnessed its awesome righteous fury as the searing flames licked the darkened winter sky.

The release did not contain umlauts. Those were added by Nätionäl Zerö to make it more metal.

Categories
Uncategorized

Grassley and Durbin meow at Trump over IGs getting fired

“We write to you concerning the reported firing of Inspectors General from 18 offices. Congress was not provided the legally required 30-day notice and case-specific reasons for removal, as required by law. Accordingly, we request that you provide that information immediately.”

“On December 23, 2022, the ‘James M Inhofe National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2023’ was signed into law and included provisions from the Securing Inspector General Independence Act, which was introduced by a bipartisan group of members. Those provisions require that the President ‘shall’ communicate to Congress in writing 30 days before removing or transferring an IG from office the ‘substantive rationale, including detailed and case-specific reasons’ for the removal or transfer. The law also prohibits an IG from being placed on non-duty status during the 30-day period preceding the date of removal or transfer unless the continued presence of the Inspector General in the workplace poses a threat as described by requirements in the Administrative Leave Act and the President submits a report to Congress. While IGs aren’t immune from committing acts requiring their removal, and they can be removed by the president, the law must be followed. The communication to Congress must contain more than just broad and vague statements, rather it must include sufficient facts and details to assure Congress and the public that the termination is due to real concerns about the Inspector General’s ability to carry out their mission,'” write Senators Charles Grassley and Dick Durbin in a letter to the Orange Pharaoh.

Categories
Uncategorized

Caroline Kennedy undorses Cousin Bobby for HHS

Former First Daughter Caroline Kennedy on Tuesday sent a letter to senators undorsing her cousin Robert F Kennedy Jr to be US Secretary of Health and Human Services, per the Washington Post. “I have known Bobby my whole life, we grew up together,” wrote Kennedy, rattling off that “It’s no surprise that he keeps birds of prey as pets because he himself is a predator,” that through “the strength of his personality,” other family members followed Bobby “down the path of drug addiction… His basement, his garage, his dorm room were the centers of the action where drugs were available, and he enjoyed showing off how he put baby chickens and mice in the blender to feed his hawks. It was often a perverse scene of despair and violence.”

Caroline did give props to Bobby for “pulling himself out of illness and disease” but lamented the “siblings and cousins who Bobby encouraged down the path of substance abuse suffered addiction, illness, and death while Bobby has gone on to misrepresent, lie, and cheat his way through life.”

Categories
Uncategorized

Johnson tells House GOP debt ceiling lift unlikely

House Speaker Mike Johnson on Tuesday told House Republicans that obeying their Orange Overlord’s commands to raise or abolish the debt ceiling was probably not going to happen in their first spending bill, CNN’s Sarah Ferris reports on the caucus walking themselves into Dems holding the gun on the limit and extorting major concessions from the Republicans.

Categories
Uncategorized

Danish museum says come check out their fossilized puke

“In good old-fashioned Danish, a blob of fossil vomit has been found on Stevns Klint. Such finds are rare, and the Danish Animal Welfare Committee has just declared the fossil vomit to be Danish animal welfare. In technical terms, this type of find is called regurgitalite, and they are considered very important when reconstructing ancient ecosystems, because the finds provide important knowledge about which animals have been eaten by whom. The find was made by local fossil hunter Peter Bennicke, who discovered a strange little collection of sea lily pieces in a piece of chalk he had just split. He brought the find to Geomuseum Faxe, where it was cleaned and examined by Dutch sea lily expert John Jagt,” says the Danish Geomuseum Faxe in a blog post about their puke.

“The expert concluded that the collection consisted of at least two different species of sea lilies mixed together in a round clump, and that it must be the remains of sea lilies that had been eaten by an animal that had subsequently regurgitated the indigestible parts of the sea lilies. Museum curator at Geomuseum Faxe and member of the Danish Wildlife Committee Jesper Milàn explains: ‘It is truly an unusual find. Sea lilies are not a particularly nutritious diet, as they mainly consist of calcareous plates held together by very few soft parts. But here is an animal, probably a type of fish, that 66 million years ago ate sea lilies that lived on the bottom of the Cretaceous sea and regurgitated the skeletal parts back up. Such a find provides important new knowledge about the relationship between predators and prey and the food chains in the Cretaceous sea.'”

“If you would like to see the new Danish puke, you can do so during the winter holidays (weeks 7 and 8), where it will be exhibited in a small special exhibition at Geomuseum Faxe.”

Categories
Uncategorized

“Never bow down to a tyrant”

CNN’s Jim Acosta signed off his last show on the network Tuesday, just minutes after convicted felon President Trump, who Acosta so excellently harried for years posted his little victory dance with “Wow, really good news! Jim Acosta, one of the worst and most dishonest reporters in journalistic history, a major sleazebag, has been relegated by CNN Fake News to the Midnight hour, ‘Death Valley,’ because of extraordinarily BAD RATINGS (and no talent!). Word is that he wants to QUIT, and that would be even better. Jim is a major loser who will fail no matter where he ends up. Good luck Jim!” after Acosta’s cunt of a boss forced him out to appease the Orange God Emperor.

No need to get all corny about what Acosta just said, but he stands tall in a world where the pussies at Google just relabelled the map to say “Gulf of America” and “Mt McKinley.” Counts more than you might think it does right now, that down the road people are going to remember who supplicated out of cowardice and who defied the fascist dictator who was not actually invincible and immortal.

Categories
Uncategorized

Vast majority of Greenlanders oppose US annexation: poll

A new survey conducted by public opinion outfit Verian for newspapers Sermitsiaq in Greenland and Berlingske in Denmark finds 85 percent of Greenlanders oppose joining the US and prefer instead to stick with the Danes. The Berlingske article is paywalled so further details were unavailable to National Zero, but besides maybe how many respondents opted for independence from Denmark, what else is an 85 percent majority going to tell you? This isn’t happening without popular support and the first apparently reliable polling on the matter says it isn’t there, no matter how many homeless guys Don Jr wants to give food and free MAGA hats so they’ll pose in a staged photo.

Just going to throw this out there, that maybe Greenlanders would be more amenable to supporting US annexation if there were guaranteed statehood, generous economic benefits, and mentally stable governance rather than half-formed threats of military conquest and subjugation.

Categories
Uncategorized

Michigan Dem Senator Gary Peters to retire

Michigan Senator Gary Peters will announce his retirement at 9:30 AM EST on Tuesday, opening up his seat in 2026, Talking Points Memo reports. Pretty freaking early in a cycle to be hanging it up.

Worth raising whether this is specifically to give Pete Buttigieg a head start on his expected bid for another office. Obviously Pete’s from Indiana, but the amount of time could be giving him a chance to get established in the Great Lakes State and not be labeled a “carpet-bagger.”

Categories
Uncategorized

Politico gently warns Trump there might be actual consequences

Writing about convicted felon President Trump’s abrupt halt to tens of billions of federal grants and loans, Politico Playbook’s Tuesday morning newsletter of course goes full on with “Trump’s massive power grab,” just utterly awed by how much of a brute force of nature the fat fuck is with flexing his supreme God-like abilities to shape the political conversation and blah blah blah.

A few paragraphs down is when they note that, well, some people might be affected. “How big a political risk is Trump taking? [emphasis Playbook’s] His supporters are already celebrating the imminent spending purge, but over the next few days, we’re going to discover the full range of programs, projects and initiatives whose funds have suddenly been blocked. And given the sweeping scale of the order, it seems unlikely these will all be glowingly liberal, woke-tastic DEI projects in coastal America. This order is going to affect communities the length and breadth of the country. Be careful what you wish for, Mr President.” WHOA! BETTER PUMP THE BRAKES THERE PLAYBOOK, OTHERWISE YOUR GOD MIGHT SMITE YOU WITH A SIMPLE POINTING OF HIS FINGER.

“But let’s also be clear: Amidst the liberal outrage, it’s important to remember that this was all spelled out by Trump long in advance. Throughout the election campaign, he told America repeatedly that he would reshape the federal government, root out (and even prosecute) his enemies, pardon supporters who were convicted of violent crimes, slash government spending programs en masse and ax huge numbers of federal jobs. And then he won 77 million votes to do exactly that. Those accusing Trump of being anti-democratic might note that this is largely democracy in action.” Ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh enough… Seriously fuck you, Politico.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Picasso no longer available for adoption in Muscatine, Iowa

5 hours ago

Los Angeles ICE raid sweeps up 12 out of 120 targeted

7 hours ago

Coast Guard urges Great Lakes-area residents to be careful on ice

9 hours ago

Wyoming Republican suddenly in favor of “preferred pronouns”

10 hours ago

Judge denies AP bid for injunction on White House access

11 hours ago

Denny’s to begin surcharging for eggs

11 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Macron stuck next to demented old piss fetishist

13 hours ago

“Non-responses are not considered a resignation”

13 hours ago

Florida Quebecois-American Trump fan motelier annoyed by consequences, says countrymen ghosting him “way overreacting”

14 hours ago

Russian tourist poses for pic while hanging out of train in Sri Lanka

15 hours ago

How long until Republicans start shrieking “insurrection” again?

16 hours ago

Wall Street already tired of Trump’s bullshit and volatility

18 hours ago

House GOP looking to impose work requirements on SNAP

20 hours ago

Fox News reject fails upward to Deputy FBI Director

1 day ago

Orange Fuhrer freaking out over Michael Wolff book, again

1 day ago

Frederich Merz on track to become next German chancellor

2 days ago

Cleanup on Aisle MAGA

2 days ago

Regime to deport unaccompanied undocumented minors to protect them from sex trafficking and other exploitation: memo

2 days ago

Jeffries not ready to lift a finger to help House GOP fund government

2 days ago

Fox News excited Idaho maniac could face firing squad

2 days ago

Pope Francis in “critical condition”

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: CPAC shitshow, Day 3

3 days ago

“ELON IS DOING A GREAT JOB, BUT”

3 days ago

Missouri Republican intros bill creating pregnancy registry

3 days ago

Movie Night Friday: Everest

3 days ago

Massachusetts teenagers rescued from waist-deep snow

3 days ago

Nice “gotcha” there, you fucking idiot

3 days ago

Acting ICE director sacked

3 days ago

Dow Jones sinks below January 20th level

3 days ago

“This is a deeply personal matter that is being unfairly exploited for political purposes”: Cory Mills’s not-wife after alleged assault

4 days ago

Report: Trump to join Putin for World War II victory parade

4 days ago

Capitol Police arrest Enrique Tarrio

4 days ago

Patriotic Red Stater chooses to celebrate Second Amendment

4 days ago

Judge appoints special counsel to fight Adams dismissal

4 days ago

“Eggs, I’m hearing so much about eggs”

4 days ago

MAGA Congressman Cory Mills under investigation for assault

4 days ago

Ronny Jackson evidently a Paramount+ subscriber

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: MAGA cosplay fan-con, Day 2

4 days ago

Florida man and alligator both win fight

4 days ago

Orange Asshole lets James Carville get to him

4 days ago

Shoving Jim Acosta out the door sees real results for CNN

4 days ago

Conscientious Amtrak passenger keeps undershirt and briefs on

4 days ago

Hong Kong Democrats no longer in disarray

4 days ago

Fox News reports tiny red dots of liberty cropping up in Blue State

4 days ago

“He had been a supporter of President Trump prior to the layoff”

4 days ago

Canada 3 – USA 2 in Four Nations Face-off Final

4 days ago

Constituents boo Georgia MAGA Congressman defending DOGE

4 days ago

Orange Empire to vanquish Haitian refugees

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange American hosts Black History Month show

4 days ago

Venezuelan refugees sue Trump regime over status removal

5 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x