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Orange God Emperor thinks the word “summit” sounds gay

“The Fake News is reporting that I am SEEKING a ‘Summit’ with President Xi of China. This is not correct, I am not SEEKING anything! I may go to China, but it would only be at the invitation of President Xi, which has been extended. Otherwise, no interest! Thank you for your attention to this matter,” posted convicted felon President Trump early Tuesday.

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Five dead in shooting attack on office housing NFL headquarters

At least four people are dead – an NYPD officer included – after a man identified as Shane Devon Tamura of Las Vegas opened fire in a Manhattan building housing the headquarters of the NFL, Blackstone, KPMG, and other major companies on Monday evening, the New York Post reports.

Tamura also blasted himself with the high-powered AR-15 he used in the attack, so technically it’s at least six dead, but fuck him. The crazy asshole’s motive is unknown but the targeted location is extremely unlikely to have been chosen at random given the tenants of the building.

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Third whistleblower says Emil Bove lied to Congress

A third whistleblower has come forward against creepy looking weirdo former Trump defense lawyer-turned Justice Department official-turned federal circuit court nominee Emil Bove, claiming that the far right shitbag had lied about an unspecified matter during his confirmation hearings, the Washington Post reports without getting into what exactly the lie was other than saying it was something completely separate and apart from Bove encouraging subordinates to defy court orders.

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Sherrod Brown and Schumer meet in Ohio

Dem former Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown, who lost to Senator Bernie “M4M” Moreno last year by 3.9 percent – which isn’t all that bad considering former Vice President Kamala Harris lost the Buckeye State by 10 percent – met last week with Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer hopefully not to just catch up on old times, Axios reports on a good candidate set coming together for the Donks.

Every Senate map is bad for the Dems. There are no good ones. They all fucking suck. When you string 2026 and 2028 together however you can see 50 if not 51 seats as gettable. Defense of held seats will be (relatively) easy at least. Tops is North Carolina, which you can start feeling cautiously bullish about, Maine, which Susan Collins is a weasel but if a good Dem steps up, maybe. Then Wisconsin in 2028, where RonAnon may just dip out. The thing with Brown in Ohio is that if it comes to a point where he’s clearly ahead of Jon Humpsman or whatever that scrub’s name is then it’s probably a national environment in with Texas and even Kentucky are winnable if, again, there are strong Dems in contention. The more likely path is that it’ll be where it’s a tossup until the bitter end and then one of them wins by like 5 percent and fucking Nate Silver will be able to say the data that none of you plebes were paying attention to had pointed to that outcome all along.

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NRSC freaking out over new Apple anti-spam measures

“Apple’s iOS 26 update introduces aggressive message filtering. Political texts-even from verified and compliant senders-will be treated as spam by default, silently sent to an ‘Unknown’ inbox with no alerts or notifications. That change has profound implications for our ability to fundraise, mobilize voters, and run digital campaigns. It’s important to understand: Apple isn’t just targeting cold outreach or spammy actors. Every political message – shortcode, long code, doesn’t matter -gets pushed into the dark. The only workaround-getting a voter to reply-is increasingly rare and entirely at the mercy of Apple’s unclear rules. How will a voter reply if they never get the message? Here’s the shift in practice. Today, a voter with an iPhone gets our message just like a normal text.”

“In iOS 26, unless that person has already replied, our message is silently sent to the ‘Unknown’ inbox. No ping, no badge, just buried in an inbox few people ever check. We’ve spent years complying with rigorous standards – providing full documentation, opt-in proof, and message samples via Campaign Verify and The Campaign Registry-yet Apple ignores that. Carriers respect it. Apple doesn’t. Estimated prospecting losses: NRSC alone could see a $25M+ revenue hit. Since 70 percent of small-dollar donations come via text, and iPhones make up 60 percent of US mobile devices, the macro effect could be over $500M in lost GOP revenue. But this isn’t just about money-it’s also about the impact on voter contact. GOTV messages, voter persuasion texts, rapid-response messaging, election day reminders-these are time-sensitive, critical communications. iOS 26 breaks all of that,” says a memo from the National Republican Senate Committee’s central fundraising crew.

Huh. Interesting how it’s “OMG we gotta stop this!” and not like “Well that sucks, but it’ll even out because the Dems send out the same exact kind of text messages.” Almost like they’re admitting they rely on spamming the kind of people prone to responding to random texts asking them for money.

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This spelling paid for by Mike Collins for Senate

The video from which this still image was captures is as of 2:39 PM EDT on Monday, July 28, 2024, still up on the “Mike Collins War Room” Twitter account, which was stealth launched on Sunday before the Georgia MAGA Congressman officially announced his bid Monday with the obnoxious trucking-themed campaign to take on incumbent Dem Jon Ossoff because term-limited Governor Brian Kemp didn’t want to risk losing even though polling showed him formidable.

The official launch against a primary field shared only with fellow MAGA House member Buddy Carter came just an hour or so after NOTUS reported Kemp and convicted felon President Trump butting heads yet again after another quasi-detente and yes it’s about who’s going to run for Senate, with Kemp trying to recruit former University of Tennessee football coach Derek Dooley. What’s funny and completely unsurprising is that it’s not that Trump is necessarily opposed to Dooley so much as unfamiliar with him and far more annoyed at Kemp grooming him to run for the seat. “People are pissed. Trumpworld is pissed,” one minion says of the way Kemp has handled it.

Even funnier is this quote from a “source close to Trump”: “You think in Georgia they would’ve learned their lesson with someone tied to football. But apparently they haven’t,” referring to Herschel Walker. This as if it was Kemp who went out of his way to recruit the CTE-brained Walker to run against Raphael Warnock in 2022 and not, you know, Trump himself. Fucking assholes, lol.

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Defendant challenges Habba’s prosecutorial authority

What was obviously going to happen when convicted felon President Trump and his pedophile-protecting Attorney General Pam Bondi began trying to find some loophole to keep idiot Acting US Attorney for New Jersey Alina Habba has happened as Politico reports the defense attorney for some gangbanger asshole facing gun and drug charges has filed a challenge against his pending trial as the case would proceed under “questionable legal authority” given Habba’s non-legitimacy.

“I got the idea over the weekend because my trial was imminent and I thought it was an important issue that needed to be litigated,” said attorney Thomas Mirigliano, who did not further elaborate on the setting of where he got the idea. Which invites speculation that he was sitting behind the wheel, staring into space while waiting for a red light, realizing he was looking at a sign that said “PARK HERE: $11.99/HOUR” and thought to himself “Hah, wonder if Habba Blabba’s going to go back to that line of work now th- Oh motherfucker! She’s still the US Attorney, right?!?”

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Chicom auto manufacturers manufacturing sales numbers too

Chinese EV auto manufacturers Neeta, Zeekr, and several others that sound like you can order them on Temu and/or could be the original designers of the Trump T1 mobile phone have been juicing their sales numbers recently by requiring a vehicle be insured before a sale in order to inflate their sales numbers in an absolute clusterfuck of a market with 100+ brands, Reuters reports.

The net effect is not like in Fargo where Jerry was ripping off GMAC by filling out loan applications for nonexistent vehicles let alone Enron. It is however a symptom of what appears to be a serious bubble in the country’s chaotic auto industry at this late stage of capitalism under a false imprimatur of communism. The housing market’s considerably worse. Shit, don’t even get started on it.

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Jaydee says Trump has nothing to hide in still-hidden Epstein files

Last week the Bulwark’s Jonathan V Last put together a pretty compelling if conspiratorial hypothesis that Jaydee’s subtly undermining the fat fuck when it comes to the dead sex-trafficker, closely scrutinizing every one of his statements on the matter, pointing in particular about how, in responding to the birthday letter story that the veep kind of gave away the game, writing “There are plenty of ways Vance could have defended Trump. He could have said that the letter was fabricated; or that it was genuine, but meaningless. He could have said that these sorts of letters were ghostwritten by Trump’s staff. Vance chose the one defense that is falsifiable and then invited the media to demolish it. That’s probably not an accident,” and yeah it’s hard to see how neckbeard isn’t continuing to follow that same script in the above clip. If it is the script.

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Team Orange warns court Murdoch might die before deposition

“Plaintiff President Donald J Trump (‘Plaintiff’ or ‘President Trump’), by and through undersigned counsel and pursuant to Federal Rules of Civil Procedure 26(d), 30(a)(2)(A)(iii), and 32(a)(4)(C), files this Motion to Compel Expedited Deposition De Bene Esse of Defendant Keith Rupert Murdoch (‘Motion’). In support, President Trump states as follows: SUMMARY OF MOTION The Court should grant this Motion and enter an Order compelling the expedited deposition of Defendant Keith Rupert Murdoch (‘Murdoch’) for at least three reasons. First, Murdoch is 94 years old, has suffered from multiple health issues throughout his life, is believed to have suffered recent significant health scares, and is presumed to live in New York, New York. Taken together, these factors weigh heavily in determining that Murdoch would be unavailable for in-person testimony at trial. Second, mindful that there presently is no current scheduling order given the recency of the commencement of this action, the parties have not yet conducted their Rule 26(f) conference, and initial disclosures have not yet been served, the requested discovery sought in this Motion is limited solely to Murdoch.”

“Third, Murdoch has an advantage over President Trump as Murdoch is able to defend himself because he has access to all the information and documents related to the below-defined malicious and defamatory Article, and the decision behind deciding to publish it. On the other hand, President Trump has very limited information related to the Article. For these and other reasons that follow, Murdoch would not suffer any prejudice significant enough to outweigh the good cause that exists to grant this Motion,” write convicted felon President Trump’s lawyers in the motion requesting an expedited deposition of Old Man Murdoch in the fat bastard’s insane lawsuit over the Wall Street Journal’s article about the Epstein birthday letter.

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Trump claims he never visited Epstein Island

Though the livestream of this is still running below on the homepage, it’s worth flagging that convicted felon President Trump told reporters in Scotland on Monday that he never had the “privilege” of going to the private abode of illegal in the Carribbean territory of the US Virgin Islands.

That sick fuck Epstein definitely knew what he was doing when he was looking for real estate there, but Jeff’s dead and his friend Donald unfortunately isn’t yet. The assertion that he never once visited is worth sticking a pin on because it’s very much a falsifiable one that reporters and researchers would do well to start looking into to see if, like other denials from the fat fuck this month, whether they’re going to collapse under some scrutiny. Hell for all we know there’s some offhand mention from Trump about how luxurious the island is in some interview from like 2002.

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Obama White House lied about COVID: MAGA Kansas Senator

Kansas Senator Roger Marshall squeezed in an early morning hit on Maria Bartiromo’s show before hitting the links on Monday and in that hit he squeezed in a mention of the Obama Administration lying to Americans about COVID, which is pretty big if true. If President Obama and his cabinet were untruthful about the COVID-19 virus then who knows what else they were lying about, especially when it comes to issues like renovations of the Federal Reserve headquarters under Jerome Powell or the state of the FBI during now-former Director Chris Wray’s leadership.

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World War II veteran to become a man

Delray Beach, Florida World War II veteran Harold Terens tells the AP he plans to become a man at some point early next year by undertaking the traditional Jewish rite of a bar mitzvah. At age 102.

Which is about 89 or 90 years later than usual but Terens had some familial difficulties back in the 1930s. “My mother came from Poland. My father came from Russia. And my mother was a religious Jew. And my father was anti-religious. So they had two sons. And one son, they compromised. One son got bar mitzvahed, the other son didn’t,” said Terens, explaining the odd arrangement.

Terens plans on having the ceremony at the Pentagon, the seat of the military he served as an airplane mechanic before and during the US-led invasion of Nazi-occupied Europe in 1944 and 1945.

The manhood ritual follows his wedding in France during the 2024 80th anniversary of D-Day. “I thought my wedding in Normandy last year was the highlight of my life. Number one of all the moments of my life. You know, that’s the saying, that life is not measured by how many breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away,” Terens said. It’s not clear if the former widower Terens’s current wife Jeanne Swerlin, 97, is a woman or needs to undergo a bat mitzvah.

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Majorities oppose Trump regime’s immigration enforcement: poll

A new release in the slow rollout of a Wall Street Journal national survey conducted by Trump campaign pollster Tony Fabrizio’s operation finds that two prongs of the Orange God Emperor’s mass-deportation push were opposed by 58 percent of voters: detaining and deporting people believed to be in the US illegally without due process – which ends up getting citizens deported, and the second being shipping them to dungeons in El Salvador and South Sudan.

Worth noting is that this same survey also found Trump at 44 percent approval on how he’s handling inflation and prices, while other pollsters usually find him in the low 30s on that matter.

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Tyler Boebert arrested for “misdemeanor abuse” of toddler son

Tyler Boebert, the shitbag son of white trash QAnon fan Colorado Congresswoman Lauren is not actually in prison where he should be given his felony weapons charge from an incident last year in which he robbed a woman suffering from a brain tumor, but at home with his toddler son who was the victim of an unspecified act of abuse by Tyler as detailed in an arrest affidavit that Westword have yet to obtain, as they write “Details about the circumstances that led to the criminal citation were not publicly available as of July 25.” How the fuck can anything considered an act of abuse toward a two year-old toddler that comes by law enforcement and the justice system be charged as a goddamned misdemeanor like it were shoplifting a budget model flatscreen TV from Walmart?

Probably too much to hope that this crime would be a violation of his probation and send Ty Ty to big boy prison for a few years. Or that he somehow would ever be a political liability for his dipshit mom. God forbid MAGA voters in Colorado’s 4th see him as they did Hunter Biden.

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There’s gotta be some way to ensure Medicaid cuts rural Missouri pharmacist favors in principle do not end up hurting his business

At the bottom of a Guardian story about a rural Missouri county’s hospital teetering on the brink of closure before poll-tested work requirements meant to punish those able-bodied gamers “collecting Medicaid checks” – which aren’t actually a thing – kick in are the shot and chaser from pretty obviously MAGA pharmacist Jim Brands, who tells the paper he’s in favor, even as the question isn’t whether his business will suffer losses from mass un-enrollment but how bad the hit will be.

“Just seeing this community, the situation it’s in, the poverty, we’ve got to get people to work. There are a ton of able-bodied people that could work that choose not to,” Brands said as his brain performed a subroutine implanted by the human software engineers at Fox News.

STDOUT Error: Exception found. “To me, there’s got to be a better way to weed out the fraud and not step on the toes of the people who need it,” Brands then said, as if pleading for that exception to his cold, uncaring masters to figure out a way for his political brainwashing not be at cross-purpose with his desire to not have to sell more loose Oxycontins out the back door to make ends meet because the ivermectin isn’t moving as well as it used to. Back before the people who bought it died.

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Markwayne has difficulty selling Jake Tapper on his opinion that Epstein was prosecuted under the Obama Admin: Live updates

Here’s more for Oklahoma MAGA voters to be not at all embarrassed about from their elected officials as Senator Markwayne Mullin on Sunday repeatedly and vehemently insisted to CNN’s Jake Tapper that now-dead sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein’s first federal indictment was brought by the Obama Administration in 2009 “way before Trump was even considering to be in office” – which is bullshit itself because Trump ran a brief third-party bid in 2000 – but the larger misstatement is that it was the prior year, during the Bush Administration. Oh and that the then-US Attorney for the Southern District of Florida, who struck the “sweetheart deal” with Epstein was none other than Alex Acosta, who served as Trump’s Secretary of Labor until 2019 when he resigned under pressure after the sex trafficker came under renewed scrutiny from media and federal law enforcement.

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Oklahoma Superintendent possibly caught watching porn at work

This story’s a bit idiosyncratic. Not that it comes across as non-credible or inauthentic, but it’s both vague and over-the-top brazen, so it’s best just to go in a straight line with what two members of the Oklahoma State Board of Education told NonDoc.com about what they saw on a screen in far-right extremist state Superintendent Ryan Walters’ office during an executive meeting on Thursday.

Board members Becky Carson and Ryan Deatherage – both right wingers appointed by Gov Kevin Stitt within the last year – were the only ones who could see the screen from their vantage point during the meeting. Neither have any idea whatsoever the context of the footage was or whether it was definitely porn, save for Carson thinking it was kind of “retro” in nature and that the women might’ve been lying on “chiropractic” tables. So not definitely not massage table porn.

“I was like, ‘What am I seeing?’ I kind of was in shock, honestly. I started to question whether I was actually seeing what I was seeing. I was like, ‘Is that woman naked?’ And then I was like, ‘No, she’s got a body suit on.’ And it happened very quickly, I was like, ‘That is not a body suit.’ And I hate to even use these terms, but I said, ‘Those are her nipples,'” Carson said and just gotta stop right there to both lol at she “hates to even use” the word “nipples” and note that it also doesn’t hurt her credibility. At the very least she’s a convincing liar if this is some kind of palace coup plot

“And then I was looking closer, and I got a full-body view, and I was like, ‘That is pubic hair.’ Even right now, I couldn’t even tell you what I was watching,” Carson continued, still having no idea of the exact nature of the footage but crystal clear what she was looking at, adding “the mama bear and teacher in me came out” and she “stopped the meeting cold” by confronting Walters immediately.

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Movie Night Saturday: The Island

Behold, an actually legitimately complex and kind of smart and challenging movie by Michael Bay. Such rare gems exist just as a Steven Spielberg film that is a piece of shit does. BONUS: The Island does in fact reference abuse of innocent bodies of by the rich, but it’s not like Epstein Island. Mostly.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Strait closed until Orange Ayatollah agrees to demands: Iranians

2 hours ago

Judge orders MAGA Virginians to re-rename Confederate schools

7 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Robber Barons praise their Orange Cash Cow

23 hours ago

Princess Donald cries over his magical ballroom’s disappearance

1 day ago

Bitch Cassidy and the Sunsetting Career

1 day ago

White House economic wiener retcons July jobs report

1 day ago

July jobs report smashes expectations

1 day ago

Murkowski a no on Todd Blanche

1 day ago

Orange Fuhrer refuses to endorse John Thune for Senate leader

1 day ago

Andy Ogles loses primary

1 day ago

Jon Husted’s wife or someone finally told him to man the fuck up

2 days ago

Fat president still screaming about “fake news” and shit

2 days ago

“How to Lose Friends and Antagonize Presidents” by Thom Tillis

2 days ago

Beaver attacks prompt closure of Maryland state park waterways

2 days ago

Bunnygate scandal continues to engulf Miller campaign

2 days ago

Enraged Fuhrer vows “treasonous” leakers being “hunted down”

2 days ago

Failed casino owner shares business wisdom in Vegas: Live

3 days ago

Jon Husted has no opinion on Max Miller

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Todd and K$H’s Excellent Press Conference

3 days ago

Fox News-brained senior citizen actually constitutionally empowered to follow through on his bullshit rants, doesn’t

3 days ago

Patriot arrested outside of Trump’s California golf course

3 days ago

DCCC adds another 12 seats to target list

3 days ago

Chuck Edwards throws in the towel after Ethics finding

3 days ago

Axios “reality checks” Trump’s “golden age”

3 days ago

Abdul El-Sayed wins Michigan Dem Senate nomination

4 days ago

Stuffed toy bunny hostage situation, other matters, unresolved

4 days ago

Minnesota MAGA Congressman hints Tom Emmer possibly dying

4 days ago

Box-o-Wine brought evidence to White House

4 days ago

Max Miller asks House Ethics to investigate him

4 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump defense lawyer confirmation hearing

4 days ago

David Ellison bitches about antitrust lawsuits in NYT op-ed

4 days ago

British Neo-Nazi running as Tory in local UK election

4 days ago

Fox News reports Nick Shirley staging dumbassery in Ceuta

4 days ago

“Things aren’t looking good”

5 days ago

Box-o-Wine arrives at White House

5 days ago

Trump considering firing Judge Box-o-Wine over pool case fail

5 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange Pharaoh signs some lame executive order

5 days ago

Surprise! Jim Jordan getting in on New Jersey voter fuckup

5 days ago

Frailty, thy name is Donald

5 days ago

NYC-owned grocery stores might require “library card-esque thing” to enter, which is hypocritical because voter ID blah blah blah

5 days ago

Naoero is the new Nauru

5 days ago

Insecure old loser fails to provide his “REAL Polling Numbers”

5 days ago

Newsmax reports near-dead alcoholic agrees with abusive master

5 days ago

UK gas stations losing £194,000/day to theft since Iran war began

5 days ago

CENTCOM internally crowdsourcing ideas to defeat Iran

5 days ago

Missouri station’s “SHOOTING” placeholder not exciting enough

5 days ago

Blanche orders plug pulled on slush fund

5 days ago

Max Miller refuses to resign and/or drop reelection bid

6 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with basic consistency: Sunday AM live

6 days ago

Arkansas state House Republican arrested for domestic battery

6 days ago

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