Nonagenarian Cameroon President Paul Biya, who sometimes had the energy to show up to campaign rallies as he ran for a seventh term, was sworn in once again on Thursday following a contentious, bloody, and probably rigged election, the AP reports.

What do young voters care about most? @ComfortablySmug breaks it down.

"President Trump has been delivering on a bunch of his promises… but he needs to make the focus of it affordability. That's what's really on their minds." pic.twitter.com/f2cCTzCwnn

— FOX & Friends (@foxandfriends) November 6, 2025

This already surreal liver damage dream of a Twitter user identified with an “@” handle wearing his sunglasses indoors at 7:27 AM in a darkened “Patriot Awards” set is even nuttier for a low-key detail: The “Brookville, NY” in the top lefthand corner. Brookville is not some neighborhood in Manhattan.

It’s about 20 miles east, out in Great Gatsby country, almost certainly in a space on the CW Post campus of Long Island University. It’s not some dogshit catering hall but it isn’t exactly a world-class venue either. Just mind-meltingly bizarre and distracting from the usual Fox News stupidity.

Convicted felon President Trump’s 2024 campaign political director-turned-White House Deputy Chief of Staff James Blair this week told Politico that he thinks “you’ll see the president talk a lot about cost of living as we turn the year and into the new year,” adding that the kingpin “is very keyed into what’s going on” and will be “very, very focused on prices and cost of life.”

Notice all the future tensing and the “you’ll see the president talk” where a phrase like “take aggressive action to lower prices” should be. He’s going to talk about it more, which means lie and say that prices are back to 2019 levels, gas is under $2/gallon, so on and so forth.

Amazingly it’s something of a marginal improvement in tone and awareness over that of a quote from a “person close to the Trump administration, who was granted anonymity to discuss private conversations” that Politico printed last week in a story about the beef prices/rancher shitshow: “It’s kind of like eggs, part two. This all kind of started with just concern over consumer prices.”

Emphasis added on that because holy shit, lol. “This all kind of started,” said as if “this” wasn’t the fucking thing Team Orange spent two years essentially telling voters that Joe Biden was too old/weak and Kamala Harris too DEI to understand the secret quantum mathematical formula that would instantly turn a $18 Big Mac value meal back down to $7.49 tops at 12:01 PM on January 20th.

“This” is like Churchill coming into office and telling Parliament “Well we got our asses kicked by the Wehrmacht but we’re going to win. In fact an RAF captain told me he shot down two German planes yesterday. I think we’re winning. Anyway did you see the plans for the new Churchill ballroom? We’re demolishing 12, 14, 16, Downing Street to make room for it. Or maybe the Germans will do it for us…”

The too-often insufferable Punchbowl AM newsletter on Thursday declared their patrons and muses in the GOP to have “lost their groove” after Tuesday’s beatdowns in Virginia, New Jersey, California, Pennsylvania, and New York City. writing that “Since Trump signed the One Big Beautiful Bill Act into law four months ago, Republicans have seemed adrift. Trump has his own agenda; he’s consumed with foreign affairs, immigration and remodeling the White House, among other things. The president seems to view Congress as a nuisance he’d rather avoid than have to deal with.”

Further down in the roundup however they find something approximating a silver living for the reich, writing “But Democrats didn’t flip any seats that Trump won by more than five points, though one such race does remain too close to call. That’s not great news for Democrats when you extrapolate it out. In Congress, there are only three Republicans in Harris-won seats. And there are only a dozen or so GOP-held House seats that Trump won by five points or less, thanks to redistricting. That number is growing smaller thanks to the mid-decade round of remaps.” Phew, right?

Stuttering his way through an interview with Fox News anchor Bret Baier aired Wednesday, convicted felon President Trump was read a question/comment by a three-time Trump voter who was worried the GOP could lose the midterms if something isn’t done about affordability soon to which Trump responded telling Baier more or less she’s wrong and the Democrats are lying about it.

“Walmart just announced that Prices for a Thanksgiving Dinner is now down 25 percent since under Sleepy/Crooked Joe Biden, in 2024. AFFORDABILITY is a Republican Stronghold. Hopefully, Republicans will use this irrefutable fact!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Wednesday.

Yeah hopefully they’ll campaign on Walmart’s 2025 Thanksgiving prices in 2026. Good call.

In related news Target on Wednesday, put out this press release: “Target Corporation today announced it’s making Thanksgiving tastier, more stylish and more affordable than ever before. Back by popular demand, Target’s holiday meal for four returns at its lowest price ever – under $20, less than $5 per person.” Naturally the retailer is too woke to merit Trump’s attention.

Senate Dems on Tuesday decided together to not cave on the shutdown, Politico reports on a state of play that did not change on Wednesday, much to the failure of the fucking stupid predictions of some in the MAGA Reich that the elections would spell the end of their holding out.

WHY ARE YOU NOT ARRESTING EPSTEIN'S CLIENTS?
IT SEEMS TO ME THAT THEY REPRESENT A REAL NATIONAL SECURITY THREAT CONSIDERING THEY WERE SPYING FOR ISRAEL!
THAT'S CALLED FUCKING TREASON!
Y'ALL HAVE NO MORAL AUTHORITY LOCKING PEOPLE UP FOR THIS SHIT WHEN EPSTIEN'S CLIENTS ARE FREE!

— Jake Angeli-Chansley (@AmericaShaman) November 5, 2025

Air travelers will be fucked by Trump and Republicans’ refusal to extend Obamacare tax credits if the shutdown continues another few days, ABC News reports on Transportation Suckretary Sean Duffy and FAA maladministrator Bryan Bedford’s announcement of a 10 percent cut in capacity at 40 major airports. “Our sole role is to make sure that we keep this airspace as safe as possible. Reduction in capacity at 40 of our locations. This is not based on light airline travel locations. This is about where the pressure is and how to really deviate the pressure,” said Bedford.

“After much deliberation, I have decided not to seek reelection in 2026. I am forever grateful for the honor of serving my constituents in Congress, and proud of what I’ve accomplished for Maine. But recently, it became clear that now is the right time to step away from elected office. I have never loved politics. But I find purpose and meaning in service, and the Marine in me has been able to slog along through the many aspects of politics I dislike by focusing on the good work that Congress is capable of producing with patience and determination,” writes ME-2 Dem Jared Golden.

“But after 11 years as a legislator, I have grown tired of the increasing incivility and plain nastiness that are now common from some elements of our American community — behavior that, too often, our political leaders exhibit themselves. My team and I have strived to stay above the fray and, for that, we can hold our heads high with appreciation for each other and the way we have gone about our work,” and blah blah blah the performative DINO continued.

Christopher Nolan’s second Batman film The Dark Knight drags on for too long, adds so much unnecessary “gravitas” and nonsensical plot MacGuffins about technology, and was generally kind of hard to follow at points. But between Health Ledger’s Oscar winning performance and the utter brutality of the character, the film’s Joker is and will remain one of the most iconic villains in cinema history. The early scene where he fatally slashes a gangster named Gambol while his three lieutenants are forced to watch while held at gunpoint by Joker’s street punks is wicked enough, but what’s implied to happen next is downright demented: As he’s breaking a pool cue, the Joker goes on about how his operation is expanding and he’s looking to add more men to his small army of murderous rogues. But he’s currently only got room for one more, so he’s holding “auditions.”

Since this is a largely bloodless big budget PG-13 movie, the scene ends by leaving it to the viewer’s imagination about what happened next, though the implication is clear enough as the Joker tosses a broken cue in between Gambol’s three guys and tells them to make it quick as he exits the room.

Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum on Wednesday announced she’s pressing charges against some asshole who approached her on the street while she was talking to voters Tuesday and then proceeded to grope and try to kiss her, the AP reports. “No man has the right to violate that space,” Sheinbaum told reporters at her daily press conference. “I decided to press charges because this is something that I experienced as a woman, but that we as women experience in our country. I have experienced it before, when I wasn’t president, when I was a student,” the Chief Mexecutive added.

Mexico City Mayor Clara Brugada had announced overnight that the man, who has yet to be identified publicly, was apprehended. Whoever he is it’s plain he’s not a star. Because as a famous leader beloved by certain kids of men across the world once said, when you’re a star they let you do it. You can do anything, even to the president of a country of over 100 million. When you’re not a star you get arrested and thrown in a Mexican jail that is unlikely to be pleasant, let alone safe.

PROMISE MADE, PROMISE KEPT: NO MERCY FOR CONVICTED COP KILLERS. pic.twitter.com/US4JnkgEji

— The White House (@WhiteHouse) November 5, 2025

“Private sector employment increased by 42,000 jobs in October and pay was up 4.5 percent year-over-year according to the October ADP National Employment Report® produced by ADP Research in collaboration with the Stanford Digital Economy Lab (‘Stanford Lab’). The ADP National Employment Report is an independent measure of the labor market based on the anonymized weekly payroll data of more than 26 million private-sector employees in the United States.”

“ADP’s Pay Insights captures over 15 million individual pay change observations each month. Together, the jobs report and pay insights use ADP’s fine-grained data to provide a representative and high frequency picture of the private-sector labor market,” says ADP’s monthly jobs report press release, which will have to do if the Bureau of Labor Statistics has been mothballed.

Smarting from brutal Republican defeats across the map on Tuesday, neckbeard Vice President JD Vance the next morning gave a little pep talk to the fanboys, posting “I think it’s idiotic to overreact to a couple of elections in blue states, but a few thoughts: (1) Scot [sic] Pressler [sic], TPUSA, and a bunch of others have been working hard to register voters. I said it in 2022, and I’ve said it repeatedly since: our coalition is ‘lower propensity’ and that means we have to do better at turning out voters than we have in the past,” and just gotta stop him right there on that admission:

They would’ve lost last year if they had not pulled out all the stops to sucker in the “lower propensity” dipshits whose TikTok feeds and bullshit podcasts papered over all the fascist aspirations and outright lies of their campaign. Actual MAGA would not have been big enough to win with. Team Orange needed the low-info dumbasses who bought into completely unrealistic promises to lower grocery prices on day one. What the fuck do you think is going to happen on an off-year election day after nine months of grocery prices continuing to increase? You don’t need a goddamned PhD in political science to have anticipated that it wasn’t going to be a good night for the GOP just on the propensity angle but the margins speak to far deeper problems.

This is it. Either Los Supremos write convicted felon President Trump yet another blank check to do whatever the fuck he wants or they save him and his party from themselves.

Japan’s military leaders on Wednesday deployed troops to the country’s northern regions to put an end to an increasingly violent insurgency by the country’s ethnic bear minority, Reuters reports. The operation is centered on the small mountain town of Kazuno on the country’s main island of Honshu, where the bear insurgents have been seen patrolling the hills at alarming frequency in recent weeks.

“Even if just temporary, the SDF’s help is a big relief,” said Yasuhiro Kitakata, who Reuters says “oversees the town’s bear department,” which is uh, well it seems like the town has a dedicated “bear department” of an unknown size and budget. “I used to think bears would always run away when they heard noise, but now they actually come toward you. They’re truly frightening animals.”

The densely-populated archipelago nation has seen more than 100 bear attacks, at least 12 of them fatal, since April. The wave has yet to spur any sort of scientifically illiterate speculation that the ursines are waging a separatist campaign to challenge human dominion over parts of the islands, perhaps to establish a semi-autonomous province or even their own fully sovereign breakaway state, but damned if these sons of bitches aren’t observably madder than they used to be.

A pair of Dem special election wins ended the 13-year supermajority the MAGA party had enjoyed in the Mississippi state Senate on Tuesday, the Mississippi Free Press reports. The specials, eight in total plus two in the state House, were mostly ordered by a federal court to comply with Section 2 of the Voting Rights Act, though some had been due to vacancies. The difference between a majority and supermajority is mostly symbolic however as the GOP still holds a trifecta in Jackson.

The fat bastard is not happy with his lowly servants, telling the Senate GOP assembled that “I thought we’d have a discussion after the press leaves about what last night represented, and what we should do about it. And also about the shutdown, how that relates to last night. I think if you read the pollsters, the shutdown was a big factor, negative for the Republicans.”