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Frustrated Orange Satan demotes two top ICE officials

Convicted felon President Trump’s regime on Tuesday demoted top ICE officials Russell Hott and Peter Berg, who held top positions in the enforcement division, sending them back to the former posts in Minnesota and bringing in some other regional supervisor to replace them, Politico reports, writing that the fat bastard is “increasingly frustrated with the current pace of arrests and deportations – as well as the release of some migrants due to lack of detention capacity.”

“ICE needs a culture of accountability that it has been starved of for the past four years. We have a President, DHS secretary, and American people who rightfully demand results, and our ICE leadership will ensure the agency delivers,” DHS spokesperson Tricia McLaughlin said in a statement after Boston bureau chief Todd Lyons was brought in to take over for Hottberg.

In a similarly impetuous move, Donald also fired the USAID inspector general for pointing out that nearly half a billion dollars worth of food aid was left rotting due to his gutting of the agency.

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Anti-waste effort likely to waste $489 million worth of food aid

A Monday report by USAID’s inspector general finds that “while initial guidance following the pause in foreign assistance funding provided a waiver for emergency food assistance, shipments of in-kind food assistance have been delayed around the world. USAID-funded implementers face conflicting instructions, and USAID staff express concerns about potentially circumventing the restrictions on external communications by providing clarifying guidance. According to USAID staff, this uncertainty put more than $489 million of food assistance at ports, in transit, and in warehouses at risk of spoilage, unanticipated storage needs, and diversion. As a routine matter, USAID pre-positions emergency food aid in BHA warehouses around the world, including approximately 29,000 metric tons in Houston, Texas, valued at nearly $39 million, more than 40,000 metric tons in a warehouse in Djibouti in East Africa valued at $40 million, and over 10,000 metric tons in a South African warehouse valued at $10 million. All BHA warehouses have prepositioned emergency food aid commodities supplied by US manufacturers and American farmers, as required by law.”

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Glory Hole seeing action again

A Northern California “glory hole” is seeing a lot of wet and wild action again and – Oh my God this is about a spillway in a lake, not a 2 to 3 inch circular portal drilled into the side of a bathroom stall in a truck stop restroom, you dirty freaks. Why does everyone’s mind immediately go there every time they see the words “glory hole”? It’s so childish and sophomoric. Enough sex jokes.

Anyway the Los Angeles Times reports the Lake Berryessa “glory hole” is a drainage pipe that stands above the typical waterline of the lake and, thanks to constant rain in recent weeks, the pipe has been taking in a lot of flow. “It started spilling Feb. 4 at 6:15 pm, and we’re going to see another atmospheric river hit us on Thursday, so it’s quite likely the lake will continue to spill for a few more weeks,” said Chris Lee, the general manager for the Solano County Water Agency.

The lake itself is considered a great place for those open to trying watersports.

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Neckbeard intros articles of impeachment against federal judge

Malevolent neckbeard MAGA Congressman Eli Crane on Tuesday introduced articles of impeachment against Southern District of New York Judge Paul Engelmayer, the Gateway Pundit reports. Well the headline said “BREAKING: Rep Eli Crane Drafts ARTICLES OF IMPEACHMENT Against Obama Appointee Judge Paul Engelmayer,” based entirely on a tweet from Crane where he said he will be “drafting articles of impeachment for US District Judge Paul Engelmayer. Partisan judges abusing their positions is a threat to democracy. The left has done ‘irreparable harm’ to this country. President Trump and his team at DOGE are trying to fix it.”

The actual articles may or may not have materialized yet. They’re definitely not on his site.

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Oklahoma governor tired of dickhead state superintendent

“Today, Governor Kevin Stitt named three new members to the Oklahoma State Board of Education (OSBE). The move comes after ongoing controversy at the Oklahoma State Department of Education and disappointing scores on the annual National Assessment of Educational Progress (NAEP).”

“‘Nothing is more important than ensuring Oklahoma kids have the best education possible,’ said Gov Stitt. ‘After months of headlines followed by disappointing NAEP scores this month, it’s clear that our education infrastructure has fallen prey to needless political drama. If we want to be the best state for business, we need to make sure our kids have a path to success. It’s time for some fresh eyes and a renewed focus on our top ten goals,'” said Stitt in a statement on Tuesday, evidently tired of Superintendent Ryan Walters’s batshittery with the “months of headlines” dig.

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Kansas Republicans don’t have good answer to why they can buy candy and soda with per diem pay but SNAP recipients can’t

Republicans on the Kansas State House’s Welfare Reform Committee had no good answer last week when Dem Representative Jarred Ousley proposed an amendment to their bill eliminating soda and candy from items eligible for SNAP benefits, with Ousley arguing that legislators should also be prohibited from using their $178 per diem to buy the same – as well as booze, cigarettes, and hot meals, which are already prohibited from SNAP purchases, the Kansas Reflector reports.

“Some legislators flashed amused smiles as they thumbed through the printed pages of Ousley’s amendment. Others had puzzled frowns,” the Reflector wrote after Ousley raised the amendment with the old “what’s good for the goose is good for the gander,” during the committee markup.

“We’re looking at apples and oranges here, a little bit,” Republican Carrie Barth said. “You know, we’re looking at public assistance versus legislative pay. We’re looking at W2 benefit employee pay versus a SNAP public assistance program. Completely opposite things,” she continued, not completely wrong in the procedural sense since it’d probably be a matter for a different committee, but still. “Taxpayer dollars are taxpayer dollars,” said Wichita Dem Ford Carr to that point.

After the discussion the GOP majority voted Ousley’s amendment down and advanced the bill.

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Lauren Boebert a no comment on whether she fucked Kid Rock

“I think we’ll pass,” was the only answer the New York Post’s Page Six “gossip” blotter got from QAnon fan Congresswoman Lauren Boebert’s office when they asked why she got into a taxi with similarly white trash “musician” Kid Rock at 2:30 AM on January 21st after being seen chatting at a party celebrating their Orange Messiah’s return to power. Kid Rock’s rep was also a no comment.

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Trump declares states on their own with natural disasters

“FEMA spent tens of millions of dollars in Democrat areas, disobeying orders, but left the people of North Carolina high and dry. It is now under review and investigation. THE BIDEN RUN FEMA HAS BEEN A DISASTER. FEMA SHOULD BE TERMINATED! IT HAS BEEN SLOW AND TOTALLY INEFFECTIVE. INDIVIDUAL STATES SHOULD HANDLE STORMS, ETC, AS THEY COME. BIG SAVINGS, FAR MORE EFFICIENT!!!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday.

When does the cost of eggs and Big Macs and credit card rates go down? Is he working on that?

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Steve Bannon pleads guilty in Manhattan, gets no prison time

White nationalist alcoholic Steve Bannon has entered into a plea deal with no prison time for his “We Build the Wall” scam in the New York State-level case, ABC News reports. The dirty Nazi had been indicted on New York State-level charges after convicted felon President Trump pardoned him for the federal case on January 20, 2021, but because he had never been brought to trial, double jeopardy did not apply which left an opening for Manhattan DA’s office to get a grand jury to bring an indictment. The Orange God Emperor did not however spare Bannon’s three accomplices and all ended up doing time in federal prison: Andrew Badolato got three years and is (probably) already out, Bryan Kolfage is in the joint until November 2026, and Timothy Shea got 63 months, probably because he was the only one to actually go to trial. Twice, actually, thanks to a MAGA juror.

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Churches, Jewish groups sue DHS over immigration raids

A very lengthy list of governing bodies of Christian and Jewish congregations on Tuesday filed a federal lawsuit against dog murdering Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem and her department over the Trump Regime’s revocation of a previous restriction on ICE’s ability to conduct arrests and raids on houses of worship, with the plaintiffs arguing that’s an affront to their “religious freedoms.”

“DHS’s authorization of immigration enforcement action at Plaintiffs’ places of worship in the absence of exigent circumstances or a judicial warrant violates Plaintiffs’ rights under the Religious Freedom Restoration Act (‘RFRA’) and the First Amendment. Under RFRA, the federal government ‘shall not substantially burden a person’s exercise of religion even if the burden results from a rule of general applicability’ unless the government demonstrates that the burden is ‘the least restrictive means of furthering [a] compelling governmental interest.’ The First Amendment similarly prohibits government interference in the freedom of expressive association – including association for the purpose of engaging with others in protected religious exercise, speech, or peaceable assembly unless the government can show its conduct serves ‘compelling state interests… that cannot be achieved through means significantly less restrictive of associational freedoms,'” says the complaint.

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Mike Johnson won’t bring Lindsey’s spending bill to the floor

Jesus Dork Speaker of the House Mike Johnson on Monday told his lieutenants that he will not be putting any spending bill by Lindsey Graham onto the floor of his chamber, Punchbowl’s Jake Sherman reports, writing that Johnson “has been clear that he prefers the one-bill approach – and Graham’s plan calls for two bills,” to enact convicted felon President Trump’s agenda.

Why Johnson can’t or won’t go with Lindsey’s plan is unclear. Also unknown is whether it has anything to do with Johnson disapproving of Lindsey’s lifestyle choices, specifically if the Evangelical conservative had ever used the word “sodomite” to refer to the South Carolina senator.

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“CAMPAIGN PROMISE. IMPORTANT FOR AMERICA!!!”

“DOGE: BILLIONS OF DOLLARS OF WASTE, FRAUD, AND ABUSE BRING FOUND. CAMPAIGN PROMISE. IMPORTANT FOR AMERICA!!!” post president on internet in morning on Tuesday. All caps mean very emphatic. Much important. President voters happy when feel like winning, feel like life better. Will somehow make food and other stuff cheaper for them. Campaign promise.

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“The Shutdown Fight That Could Play Right Into Trump’s Hands”

Politico on Monday ran a column by one of their Capitol Hill reporters, Rachel Bade, headlined “The Shutdown Fight That Could Play Right Into Trump’s Hands: There isn’t one neat trick to defeating Donald Trump and Elon Musk’s war on the federal government,” warning that Democrats might live to regret trying to use spending bills as leverage to get the convicted felon and his ketamine-brained boss to stop with the bullshit and lawlessness that have paralyzed wide swaths of the government.

“Republicans, after all, will need Democratic votes to keep the government open, given the Senate’s 60-vote threshold and House conservatives’ aversion to supporting any funding bill. Why not play a little hardball, the thinking goes, and try to get Trump and Musk to back off? But having covered more than a few of these shutdown fights, I can say confidently that this isn’t the leverage point Democrats and much of Washington seem to think it is. Not only is this a battle Democrats probably can’t win, it’s one that could play right into Trump and Musk’s hands,” Bade writes before going to into the vagaries of how there’s a lot more leeway for the executive branch to exempt certain departments and agencies from the effects of a shutdown than most people understand. Which means that a shutdown could just fail to inflict any pain on the favored MAGA constituencies.

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Orange Criminal seems to be justifying dropping case vs Adams

“New York is the most corrupt State in the Union. That is why so many businesses and people are fleeing. We need great Judges and Politicians to help fix New York, and to stop the kind of Lawfare that was launched against me, from falsely valuing Mar-a-Lago at $18 Million Dollars, when it is worth, perhaps, 100 times that amount (The corrupt judge was replaced by another judge, only to be immediately put back on the case when the Democrat political leaders found out that a change of judges was made. It has become a great embarrassment for the New York Judicial System!), to a woman that I had no idea who she was, making a FAKE and ridiculous accusation, to a ‘case’ that was made up by a corrupt and highly conflicted Judge in order to criminally attack me for political purposes. Hopefully, Justice Will Prevail as these cases wind their way through the Appellate System. MAKE NEW YORK GREAT AGAIN!” posted convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday.

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Reich DOJ drops case against Eric Adams

The Trump Reich’s Justice Department on Monday commanded federal prosecutors in New York City to drop the case against corrupt and incompetent dumbass Mayor Eric Adams, CBS reports, citing a memo from really creepy-looking DOJ official/former Trump defense lawyer Emil Bove.

What a bitch move. At least pardon him to make it official instead of just wussing out on the charges, make it known that the mayor accepted clemency from the Orange God Emperor to save his ass.

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