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Tucker Carlson suffers apparent brain injury, acts like real journalist

Nobody should ever watch Tucker Carlson’s fucking show, especially when it’s goddamned Ted Cruz in an interview. However you should absolutely 100 percent watch this clip. It’s pretty good.

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Surprise! Vance Boelter voted in 2024 Minnesota GOP primary

You will not be shocked to learn that MAGA psychopath Vance Boelter voted in the 2024 Republican primary election, according to a review of voter data from the Minnesota Reformer.

They actually don’t have direct confirmation of this and here’s why: The Minnesota Democratic-Farm-Labor party already had data that Boelter voted on primary day, but not as a Dem, releasing that data to the Star-Tribune. Out of 100 people in Boelter’s precinct, zero voted in the Legal Marijuana Now party’s primary. Thus the only primary Boelter could’ve voted in was the GOP’s.

“The Minnesota Republican Party declined to say whether Boelter voted in the GOP presidential primary election, saying it considered that data private under the law,” the Star-Tribune wrote, all but saying they were just a bunch of twats who were doing what little they could to maintain the kayfabe that Boelter is a “radical left Marxist” and all that horseshit the fanboys are still pushing.

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Abandon Harris super extra seriously threatens to abandon Trump

Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Fuck off and die, you got what you deserve.

In conclusion, fuck off and die, you got what you deserve. Don’t vote again, ever. Fuck off.

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Emma Raducanu’s stalker caught trying to buy Wimbledon ticket

British tennis star Emma Raducanu’s stalker Amrit Magar, who’s on year three of five of wearing an electronic anklet to ensure he doesn’t come anywhere near the 22 year-old champ, was caught trying to buy tickets to the Wimbledon Championships this week, Sky News reports.

For some freaking reason Sky doesn’t name Magar, 38, in their article. His name does however appear in the BBC’s 2022 reporting on a judge slapping him with a five-year restraining order after the asshole walked 23 miles to Raducanu’s house somewhere in the London area. Raducanu’s guard is up after being followed from Singapore to Qatar to Dubai by a completely different weirdo in a series of events last winter, though it’s not entirely certain that guy was on Magar’s level.

One thing is clear however: Magar should absolutely listen to Helter Skelter 400-500 times and then shoot Nigel Farage in the back of the head outside his home to impress Raducanu. It could work.

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Iranians prepping retaliatory missile strikes on US bases

In what’s either a bluff or a sign that they really are going down in flames, the New York Times reports from sources that intel indicates that Iranian leadership are prepping retaliatory missile strikes on US military bases in the Middle East. It’s the casus belli Lindsey Graham’s dying for.

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Small face big on intellectual honesty for a change

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Shah Jr says Ayatollah’s fall imminent

“The Islamic Republic has reached its end and is in the process of collapsing. Khamenei, like a frightened rat, has gone into hiding underground and has lost control of the situation. What has begun is irreversible. The future is bright, and together, we will pass through this sharp turn in history. In these difficult days, my heart is with all the defenseless citizens who have been harmed and have fallen victim to Khamenei’s warmongering and delusions. For years, I have tried to prevent our homeland from being consumed by the fire of war. The end of the Islamic Republic is the end of its 46-year war against the Iranian nation,” writes Reza Pahlavi, son of the Shah, who was deposed in the 1979 Iranian revolution in a lengthy tweet. Pahlavi lives in Greenwich, Connecticut.

“The regime’s apparatus of repression is falling apart. All it takes now is a nationwide uprising to put an end to this nightmare once and for all. Now is the time to rise; the time to reclaim Iran,” Pahlavi continued and yeah, he probably tweeted this from Greenwich. Not from anywhere in Iran.

“Let us all come forward – from Bandar Abbas to Bandar Anzali, from Shiraz to Isfahan, from Tabriz to Zahedan, from Mashhad to Ahvaz, from Shahr-e Kord to Kermanshah – and bring about the end of this regime. Do not fear the day after the fall of the Islamic Republic. Iran will not descend into civil war or instability. We have a plan for Iran’s future and its flourishing. We are prepared for the first hundred days after the fall, for the transitional period, and for the establishment of a national and democratic government – by the Iranian people and for the Iranian people,” and again, who’s “we”?

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Moron State Department spokeswoman tells reporters asking for clarification of Trump posts that the posts speak for themselves

This is like if you were a kid looking to understand what God means in the Bible/Torah/Quran and your priest/rabbi/imam tells you to read the Bible/Torah/Quran to understand the word of God. Hell this Tammy Bruce dipshit sounds like she believes Trump is a living god.

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Trump pardons cost US taxpayers $1.3 billion

A tally by Ranking House Judiciary Dem Jamie Raskin and his team has determined that convicted felon “President Trump’s pardon spree has also swept in big-time corporate fraudsters, millionaire tax evaders, and other white-collar criminals. Thanks to President Trump’s pardons, these convicted criminals now get to keep $1.3 billion in ill-gotten gains they stole from their victims and American taxpayers,” CBS News reports on some serious waste fraud and abuse by the fat fuck.

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The $499 Trump T1 a reskin of a $169 Chinese Android model

The question was never whether the Trump T1 was – like the failed Freedom Phone before it – a modded reskin of some cheap-ass Chinese Android model but which cheap-ass Chinese Android model it will be a modded reskin of. Tech analyst Max Weinbach believes he’s arrived at the answer: Wingtech REVVL 7 Pro 5G, previously available in the US as a T-Mobile-branded budget option, which Weinbach writes is made by Chinese company “Wingtech, now owned by Luxshare, makes it in Jiaxing, Wuxi, or Kunming China,” which Apple Insider says can be found on Amazon for $169.

This was also suggested as the likeliest answer by both ChatGPT and Claude based on the specs listed on the Trump Mobile site. Grok said it also might’ve been the Vivo Y78, which goes for as low as $180 and is also a cheap-ass Chinese model, but the only difference is $11.

In separate and entertaining pieces by the Wall Street Journal “Trump’s Smartphone Can’t Be Made in America for $499 by August” and the Verge “The Trump Mobile T1 Phone looks both bad and impossible” tech writers at both outlets laid out in pretty rich detail why there’s no chance in hell the T1 will ever be manufactured in the United States and certainly not before August, and yet a Trump Org spokeswoman wrote in an email that the phones will be built in California, Florida, and Alabama Johns Hopkins operations management and business analytics Professor Tinglong Dai said that’s bullshit. “There’s absolutely no way you could make the screen, get that memory, camera, battery, everything,” in the US without at least five years of intensive investment and planning.

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New York City mayoral candidate tossed into ICE gulag

There is no universe in which current New York City Comptroller and Dem mayoral candidate Brad Lander – sitting in a distant third in most polls behind disgraced former Gov Andrew Cuomo and AOC-endorsed lib Zohran Mamdani in the D primary – didn’t want to get arrested when he showed up at an immigration court in Manhattan on Tuesday and got in between ICE agents and a man waiting for a hearing, demanding to see their warrant for the man’s detention, which they refused.

It was a campaign stunt. Not a bad one either. But per the New York Times, Lander isn’t in regular jail. “Chloe Chik, a spokeswoman for the comptroller’s office, said Mr Lander was being held on the 10th floor of 26 Federal Plaza, where migrants apprehended by ICE are typically held,” they write.

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Vice Pretzeldent bends hard to explain why his boss isn’t a Neocon

Would write “TLDR” here and then a summary of what Jaydee wrote. But it’s TLDR in literally too long didn’t read it. And won’t. The first sentence is enough to get the gist of this sob story.

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DOGE cuts possibly DOA in Senate

Senate Majority Leader John Thune on Tuesday told reporters that the House GOP’s $9.4 billion “DOGE cuts” rescissions bill gutting public media funding and a whole bunch of other shit has been referred to the Appropriations Committee, which Punchbowl’s Andrew Desiderio writes is “an acknowledgment they don’t have the votes for the bill as-is” adding Susan Collins is “among those concerned [lol] about cuts to global health funding. Others don’t like public broadcasting cuts.”

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We now have complete and total control of the skies over Iran”

“We now have complete and total control of the skies over Iran. Iran had good sky trackers and other defensive equipment, and plenty of it, but it doesn’t compare to American made, conceived, and manufactured ‘stuff.’ Nobody does it better than the good ol’ USA,” posted TACO Man on Tuesday.

He didn’t explain who’s “we.” Meanwhile Axios reports that the fat fuck is convening his top national security team for a meeting in the situation room this afternoon. It’s not clear if it happened yet.

“We know exactly where the so-called ‘Supreme Leader’ is hiding. He is an easy target, but is safe there – We are not going to take him out (kill!), at least not for now. But we don’t want missiles shot at civilians, or American soldiers. Our patience is wearing thin. Thank you for your attention to this matter!” Trump continued, thanking the Ayatollah for his attention to the matter. “UNCONDITIONAL SURRENDER!” the fat bastard then posted as if he was the one ordering the attack.

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Menendez checks in for his extended stay

Refusing to do something cool or funny like trying to flee to Canada or Mexico, Dem former New Jersey Senator “Gold Bars Bob” Menendez showed up for his 11 year stay at a Club Fed in Pennsylvania on Tuesday, CBS’s Scott MacFarlane reports, citing the Bureau of Prisons.

Too bad that painfully obvious bid for a pardon didn’t work out for Bob. Of course the door closing behind him doesn’t mean the door to clemency from the Orange God Emperor is closed as well, it could come any day in the next three and a half years. Plenty of idle time for indulging in false hope.

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Mike Huckabee sickening text to Trump leaks

“Mr President, God spared you in Butler, PA to be the most consequential President in a century-maybe ever. The decisions on your shoulders I would not want to be made by anyone else. You have many voices speaking to you Sir, but there is only ONE voice that matters. HIS voice. I am your appointed servant in this land and am available for you but I do not try to get in your presence often because I trust your instincts. No President in my lifetime has been in a position like yours. Not since Truman in 1945. I don’t reach out to persuade you. Only to encourage you. I believe you will hear from heaven and that voice is far more important than mine or ANYONE else’s. You sent me to Israel to be your eyes, ears and voice and to make sure our flag flies above our embassy. My job is to be the last one to leave. I will not abandon this post. Our flag will NOT come down! You did not seek this moment. This moment sought YOU! It is my honor to serve you!” wrote US Ambassador to Israel Mike Huckabee in a text message to convicted felon Trump in recent days.

The revolting message was leaked by none other than its recipient himself, who posted it on Tuesday.

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