“As temperatures rise with the season changing, Mosquito Joe®, a Neighborly® company, and the leading pest control service, is urging homeowners and business owners to take early preventive measures against mosquitoes and ticks before peak season arrives as well as preventing perimeter pests from invading the home. Recognized with a Gold Level designation by the US Environmental Protection Agency’s (EPA) Pesticide Environmental Stewardship Program (PESP), Mosquito Joe remains committed to environmentally responsible pest control as the 2025 mosquito season begins. Experts predict a longer and more intense season due to rising global temperatures and increased precipitation, creating ideal breeding conditions for pests. The urgency for early prevention is further heightened by last year’s spike in mosquito-borne illnesses in the US, including Eastern equine encephalitis (EEE) and Dengue Fever,” says a Mosquito Joe PR release.

“‘Mosquito activity is already ramping up in many regions due to fluctuating temperatures and lingering moisture from recent storms, which signals a potentially intense season ahead,’ said David Price, Associate Certified Entomologist for Mosquito Joe. ‘Taking action now can help property owners prevent infestations before they start, reducing the nuisance and health risks associated with these pests.'” Oh wow, they even have a CERTIFIED ENTOMOLOGIST on the team! Better listen to the experts and call Mosquito Joe’s because they’re just looking out for you and there’s no sort of bias, interest, or – for heaven’s sake – a profit motive in this totally altruistic, friendly press release!

Fucking dicks. They probably even secretly developed a plague that would wipe mosquitos off the face of the Earth but won’t release it because it would be suicide for their business model.

During another one of his overlong and meandering afternoon sundowns, convicted felon President Trump on Tuesday signed an order declassifying all the files concerning the FBI’s investigation into his 2016 campaign, something he could’ve done at pretty much any point during his first failed term and – more importantly – will probably be a repeat of the “Epstein Files” where his fanboys act like it’s a “BOMBSHELL” and in reality not only is there nothing new but he went out of the way to avoid releasing anything that could ever even come close to incriminating himself.

Absolutely shameful.

Jasmine Crockett is the face of the Democrat party and they all support her.

Just let her talk because the ads write themselves, and America finds out everything they need to know about who the Democrats really are. https://t.co/Qhpqrl5Gkt

— Marjorie Taylor Greene 🇺🇸 (@mtgreenee) March 25, 2025

In related news, Texas MAGA Congressman Randy “Pussy” Weber on Tuesday introduced a censure resolution against Crockett for the “Governor Hot Wheels” comment.

“Attorney General Ken Paxton issued a Civil Investigative Demand (‘CID’) to Community Capital Partners, LP (‘CCP’) as part of an ongoing investigation into CCP’s real estate development, EPIC City. The development, near Josephine, Texas, is affiliated with the East Plano Islamic Center (‘EPIC’). CCP is a corporate entity that was established by EPIC. Additionally, promotional materials advertised by EPIC have explicitly stated that not only was CCP ‘created by EPIC,’ but that EPIC is the ‘only beneficiary of profits’ from EPIC City. The CID aims to acquire material relevant to an investigation regarding potential violations of Texas consumer protection laws. ‘Under my watch, there will be zero tolerance for any person or entity that breaks Texas law,’ said Attorney General Paxton. ‘My office has an open and ongoing investigation into EPIC City, which has raised a number of concerns, and this CID will help ensure that any potential violation of state law is uncovered,'” says a press release from Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton’s office after somebody fucked up and forgot to bribe him for what QAnon freak Lara Logan claims is an “Islamic mega city.”

Convicted felon President Trump’s regime have begun pausing certain green card applications, including those from already approved refugees, for further vetting, CBS News reports on what’s probably an inexorable march toward simply shutting the entire legal immigration system down.

“USCIS is placing a temporary pause on finalizing certain Adjustment of Status applications pending the completion of additional screening and vetting to identify potential fraud, public safety, or national security concerns, in alignment” with the Orange God Emperor’s executive actions, DHS said in the statement, with “Adjustment of status” the official name of the green card process.

Amen to that – I enjoyed reading the thread – Like reading text messages of the Avengers who put America First

— Nancy Mace (@NancyMace) March 25, 2025

“The Conference Board Consumer Confidence Index® fell by 7.2 points in March to 92.9. The Present Situation Index, based on consumers’ assessment of current business and labor market conditions, decreased 3.6 points to 134.5. The Expectations Index, based on consumers’ short-term outlook for income, business, and labor market conditions, dropped 9.6 points to 65.2, the lowest level in 12 years and well below the threshold of 80 that usually signals a recession ahead. The cutoff date for preliminary results was March 19, 2025,” says the Conference Board’s latest update.

“‘Consumer confidence declined for a fourth consecutive month in March, falling below the relatively narrow range that had prevailed since 2022,’ said Stephanie Guichard, Senior Economist, Global Indicators at The Conference Board. ‘Of the Index’s five components, only consumers’ assessment of present labor market conditions improved, albeit slightly. Views of current business conditions weakened to close to neutral. Consumers’ expectations were especially gloomy, with pessimism about future business conditions deepening and confidence about future employment prospects falling to a 12-year low. Meanwhile, consumers’ optimism about future income – which had held up quite strongly in the past few months – largely vanished, suggesting worries about the economy and labor market have started to spread into consumers’ assessments of their personal situations.'”

Think tank analyst Max Lesser tells Reuters he’s uncovered Chinese Communist entities posing as American companies placing ads as “part of a broader network of fake consulting and headhunting firms targeting former government employees and AI researchers” among those who got DOGEd or expecting the Cybertruck incels to show up with pink slips soon. Move fast and break things, lol.

A bill imposing the revocation of the driver’s, hunting, and other licenses of any business owner found to be employing any person unauthorized to work in the United States failed to pass the Montana state House by a single vote on Monday, with nine Republicans joining all 41 Democrats present (one Dem was a no-show) to sink the bill 50 to 49, the Kalispell Daily Inter-Lake reports.

What exactly happened to HB 536 is a bit opaque on its page on Legiscan but it does appear that it passed 72 to 27 on the first round and then some asshole amended it to strike “knowingly” from “knowingly employs” leading to the failure. What is clear is that the Hinkle boys, Republican brothers Caleb and Jedediah Lee of the 67th and 68th Districts, were the only familial duo to vote yes together. Husband and wife Representatives George and Melissa Nikolakakos of the 20th and 22nd Districts were a yes and no respectively as were Representative Steve (HD 24) and his dad John Fitzpatrick (HD 76). Dem Representative Sid “Chip” Fitzpatrick, in between the two on the roll call, looks nothing like either of them and seems to be mostly of Indigenous American ancestry.

So does Dem Representative Tyson Running Wolf but didn’t even look at his photo. Call it a hunch.

Anyway Montana law already fines those who employ illegal labor $300 each violation which is probably why, per the Daily Inter-Lake, it’s estimated that under 1 percent of the state’s workforce is illegal. Yet the sponsors still wanted to spend $5 million to set up a state law enforcement task force to pursue employers in the amended bill, something John Fitzgerald balked at, saying “I’m not convinced we have that much of a problem to begin with. And then we’re going to put a $5 million fiscal note on a bill that essentially does not have a defined problem.” Very DOGEy there Fitz.

From an NPR internal reporting memo, apparently what they out to local radio hosts to read on-air in their roundups: “NPR’s Tom Bowman has learned that a Pentagon-wide email went out one week ago warning about the vulnerability of using the messaging app Signal. ‘A vulnerability has been identified in the Signal messenger application,’ the email begins. The app is the same one used by Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth and other leading national security officials within the administration to discuss bombing Houthi sites in Yemen.” The timing seems clear enough that this was after the morons invited Jeff Goldberg to their chat on March 14th but not 100 percent.

If it hasn’t been said on right wing media already then it’ll be at some point on Tuesday: That Atlantic editor Jeff Goldberg purposely timed his article about fucking idiot Mike Waltz accidentally inviting him to a Signal chat group about this month’s airstrikes against the Houthis to be the day before participants Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard and CIA Director John Ratcliffe had to sit for a hearing of the Senate Intelligence Committee. Maybe that Goldberg “colluded” with committee Dems and blah blah blah. May that thought bring the MAGA chuds a small measure of comfort as this very uncomfortable hearing kicks off. Should be some good entertainment for the rest of us.

Spandex-wearing grapple-freak Jim Jordan on Tuesday informed members of the House Judiciary Committee he sucks at chairing will next Tuesday hold a hearing titled “Judicial Overreach and Constitutional Limits on the Federal Courts,” a billing Politico sees as an “off-ramp” for the House GOP’s current screams for dead-end impeachments of judges who rule against the Trump regime.

The article also mentions that Jesus Dork Speaker Mike Johnson is meeting with some of the Republicans leading that tantrum this afternoon to sell them on “reforms” that probably have just about as much of a chance of getting enacted as James Boasberg and others do of being removed from the bench after a Senate trial – if the articles of impeachment even make it out of the House.

“Michael Waltz has learned a lesson, and he’s a good man,” convicted felon President Trump told NBC in a “brief interview on Tuesday,” per the New York Post, the fat bastard Susan Collinsing away whatever concerns he had with his National Security Advisor after Waltz got his lesson.

“The only glitch in two months,” Trump said, “and it turned out not to be a serious one.” Lol.

The orange slob did not address anything about Vice President Jaydee Vance questioning his infinite wisdom in ordering the strikes on the Iranian-backed Yemeni minority’s terrorist militia, especially noteworthy given that those assholes had attacked a US Navy vessel first, so why the fuck would our military not want to respond to a threat on American sailors? Trump was right to do it, even if he was full of shit about such provocations only occurring while Joe Biden was president.

Senate Intel Committee Chair @SenTomCotton: "The Biden Administration authorized Signal as a means of communication that was consistent with presidential recordkeeping requirements for its administration — and that continued into the Trump Administration." pic.twitter.com/7kgz4O1seO

— Rapid Response 47 (@RapidResponse47) March 25, 2025

This is great stuff. Fucking world class. It’s like Trump’s team have a talking point memo ready on why Roosevelt and Truman are to blame for authorizing the Manhattan Project if Pete Hegseth drunkenly ordered the Air Force to drop a nuke on Disney World. They’re so friggin creative, right?

“Some Republicans in Congress are pushing to enact tax cuts quickly before a potential recession, according to three GOP tax advisers, who spoke on the condition of anonymity to discuss private conversations,” says the second sentence of the Washington Post’s Tuesday morning article headlined “Clock ticks on Trump and GOP’s ‘big, beautiful’ bill on taxes,” detailing the urgency.

Copied that piece of reportage verbatim as it very wonderfully captures where the MAGA party’s heads are at right now, that they know they won’t be able to justify the handouts politically when millions find themselves unemployed and their businesses hurting, so they’re trying to charge ahead with it now as fast as they can. They know few if any of the hapless dipshit swing voters who bought into Trump’s sweet nothings about lowering gas and grocery prices are going to be reading the Post’s article so they can just go ahead and say it without fear of nearer-term consequence.

“Bro, what’s a signal app and who gives a shit? Yo all the politicians all the same anyway, they all crooks. I voted for Trump and I do it again because he out there telling Canada they ain’t shit which is what the president fuckin do, ain’t it? I seen him on TikTok making moves like that. Now he say he gonna lower taxes and I ain’t gonna have to pay as much. How that a bad thing?”

MAGA former Minnesota state Senator Justin Eichorn, who just eight days ago was having fun sponsoring a bill that would add “trump Derangement Syndrome” to the state’s mental health statutes, is now single again as his wife Brittany filed for divorce on Monday due to infidelity issues made worse by being caught in an underage prostitute sex sting, Northern News Now reports.

Which has to be heartbreaking for him that Brit’s unwilling to patch things up, but it’s best for him to move on and enjoy his freedom to have as much sex as he wants over the next decade or longer.

Fucking Politico Playbook already headlined their section “The Last Waltz?” Really wanted that for the headline here. Goddamned pricks. Anyway they point out that convicted felon President Trump hasn’t made any public show of support for his jackass National Security Advisor for inviting Atlantic Editor-in-Chief Jeffrey Goldberg to a chat group he and his fellow morons in charge of protecting the United States shouldn’t have even been having the first place on that goddamned app. The Wall Street Journal meanwhile reports that it’s not clear yet if Waltz will be fired and it could go either way but the Orange Pharaoh was asking his minions how the assclown could’ve been so sloppy.

In not that related but still fitting news from Waltz’s old district, Florida’s 6th, set to hold a special election to replace him next Tuesday: NBC News reports complete fucking asshole Republican candidate state Senator Randy Fine is not doing so fine and it’s making dipshit NRCC chair Dick Hudson nervous. Not like rip his hair out nervous over a Trump +30 district but nervous enough considering that Fine’s been outraised by Dem opponent Josh Weil by nearly 15-to-1.

“I would have preferred if our candidate had raised money at a faster rate and gotten on TV quicker,” Hudson said Monday. “But he’s doing what he needs to do. He’s on TV now. We’re going to win the seat. I’m not concerned at all.” Hudson this month also said “We’re on the side of the angels. We’re doing what the American people asked us to do, what 77 million people voted for Donald Trump to get. We’re going to pick up seats” in 2026 soooooooo… We’ll see how it goes. At least expect significant Dem improvement because it’s a special and Ds overperform in all of them these days.

So hated is Fine that other Florida Republicans are secretly kind of rooting for Weil, with one telling NBC “there would be no tears shed for Fine if he snatched defeat from the jaws of victory.”

20-year-old smut peddler Sophie Rain said her Christian faith has been a guiding light for her, and she still has a fruitful relationship with her church — though she admitted to only attending virtual services via her phone and rarely attending in person. https://t.co/bMBlnl2qFB

— Breitbart News (@BreitbartNews) March 25, 2025

FINALLY Breitbart grows some balls and decides to be honest about a so-called “Christian” on the hypocrisy of her ways. Better late than never for them to tell it like it is about some influential Caucasian constantly suckering incels out of their money while preaching faith and virtue only to turn around and promote sin. What a savage takedown. Welcome to the Resistance, Breitbart!

Convicted felon President Trump’s regime have sent over 60 colleges and universities demands for the names and “national origin/ethnicity/shared ancestry,” of any students involved in incidents of harassing Jewish classmates “on the basis of their Jewish ancestry,” with the pretty obvious intent of identifying those who could be subject to deportation, the Washington Post reports.

On top of Mahmoud Khalil, who the regime on Monday claimed to have lied about working with UN relief agency UNRWA that the MAGA kids purport to be a terrorist front organization, Trump’s stormtroopers are also trying to apprehend a Columbia junior who is a legal permanent resident since she was 7 years old, a British-Gambian dual national Cornell grad student on a visa, and an Indian-born Georgetown postdoctoral fellow green carder married to a US citizen from Gaza whose father formerly served as a political advisor to Hamas leadership. Happy days for white nationalists.

Dem Michigan state Senator Mallory McMorrow, already being marketed in Politico as the presumptive nominee for the seat being vacated by retiring Senator Gary Peters, tells the outlet she would not be voting for Chuck Schumer as the leader of the party’s caucus in the chamber.

“I think it is” time for Schumer to hang it up, McMorrow said, adding “There’s still this idea that Democrats and Republicans are still abiding by the same rules and still believe in the same norms and systems and structure. There seems to be a lack of recognition that this is no longer the Republican Party. This is a MAGA party. And the same approach is not going to work.”