Categories
Uncategorized

“What if John Wilkes Booth is under my bed? What if he’s hiding?”

The parents of a Tennessee three year-old tell People Magazine that their daughter has become unhealthily fixated on and fearful of John Wilkes Booth ever since a November trip to Washington, DC where the family’s stops included the museum at Ford’s Theater and the Lincoln Memorial.

Cassie Litton tells the lifestyle publication – which bills the article as an “exclusive” – that while daughter Lainey’s mentions of Booth are not “an everyday occurrence,” it does “tend to find its way into just our day-to-day conversations,” adding that on a recent Sunday the family were attending church services “and the preacher was talking about how Jesus loves us. She looked at me and she said ‘Mommy, I love Jesus.’ I said ‘That’s awesome. I’m glad you do.’ She said, ‘Jesus loves us.’ I said, ‘That’s right.’ She said, ‘You know who we don’t love? I said, ‘Who?’ She said, ‘John Wilkes Booth.’”

The small girl’s obsession with Booth has found its way into her bedtime as Cassie says occasionally she has to reassure Lainey that the pro-Confederate actor is not “in her room” or “under her bed” at night. “She was afraid to lie in her bed one night. I said, ‘It’s okay. You’re safe. You’re in your room, nobody can bother you in your own house.’ She said, ‘Yeah, but what if John Wilkes Booth is under my bed? Like, what if he’s hiding?’ She said, ‘What if he comes to take my stuffed animals away?’”

Eventually further down People Magazine’s article it becomes apparent how the family ended up being interviewed for the “exclusive”: Cassie at some point in the last six months posted a Tiktok video of Lainey talking about Booth, where it got 14.2 million views. Eventually the post caught the attention of the staff at Ford’s Theater, who sent the family free merch. Which means that of course in this day and age you can’t rule out that the whole thing is staged and the girl’s being coached into the obsession, but at the same time it does seem more than idiosyncratic enough to have genuinely come from the mind of a child. Sometimes youngsters just come up with really weird, funny shit.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Seat of global power uses “mutilization” in official communication

14 minutes ago

Venezuela earthquake death toll at least 164

1 hour ago

Orange God Emperor cancels landmark bill signing

21 hours ago

Dan Sullivan sues to run against Dan Sullivan

2 days ago

MAGA Congressman assumes Trump has evidence of pool plot

2 days ago

Iranians now even more better off than they were a year ago

2 days ago

UK cuffs thousands with alcohol ankle monitors during World Cup

2 days ago

Amphibians do eat algae, so maybe Trump’s onto something here

3 days ago

Cocaine Mitch’s staff insists he’s still alive

3 days ago

Axios reports Maine Dems have a growing mess on their hands

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Scared grownups surround tantrum-prone toddler

3 days ago

Federal judge nukes Regime subpoenas to Walk, Frey, Ellison

3 days ago

Detroit transit safety officer fired for complaining about bus driver effing supervisor on job, other top official drunkenly chasing pigeon

3 days ago

Comer still dumber than the sow he lost his virginity to in 1989

3 days ago

Dem leads Iowa Senate race 47 to 45 percent: poll

3 days ago

Alan Greenspan’s lifespan is over

3 days ago

Fox News reports they got her now

3 days ago

Keir Starmer officially announces resignation

3 days ago

Heard and McDonald Island’s baby seals clubbed hard by bird flu

3 days ago

President to sue treasonous criminals

4 days ago

Mountain Dew marketing team still has their edge

4 days ago

Baby duckling found dead in National Mall reflecting pool

4 days ago

Iranians walk out of negotiations after Trump threats

4 days ago

Fox News reads bellicose comment by deranged, elderly viewer

4 days ago

Fat toddler all but admits he’s ordering “Reflecting Poll” arrests

5 days ago

Texas woman killed when self-driving Tesla plows into home

5 days ago

Regime arresting people for taking National Mall pool paint chips

5 days ago

Orange mental patient doubles down on Italy lie

5 days ago

Newsmax guy pretty butthurt over inconsequential Trump failure

6 days ago

Scientology seizes control of public street

6 days ago

Hegseth minion tells Congress $80 billion needed to cover Iran war

6 days ago

Orange Scumbag slurs his way through some event: Live video

7 days ago

Trump threatens Americans with a good time

7 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Jaydee subs in for Karoline on lying duty, again

7 days ago

Hunter Biden wins big at Supreme Court

7 days ago

Mad Fuhrer issues signature all-caps bunker rant

7 days ago

BREAKING: UFC terror attack plotter a Mexican DACA recipient!!!

7 days ago

Tropical Storm Arthur to dump up to 20 inches of rain on Texas

1 week ago

“Pastors for Trump” founder forsaken by his true God

1 week ago

WATCH LIVE: Orange God Emperor snaps at reporters in France

1 week ago

Jon “Os(jerk!)off” pretty clever for Trump

1 week ago

“Incensed by the dissent”

1 week ago

You can kind of tell why they wanted to hang Mike Pence

1 week ago

Rick Jackson defeats Trump-endorsed scumbag in Georgia gov primary, Trump-endorsed scumbag Collins takes Senate primary

1 week ago

Trump needs Modi to help him climb single step

1 week ago

Regime to allow Iranians to start selling oil immediately

1 week ago

Jaydee x The View kind of sucked for Jaydee

1 week ago

McDonald’s celebrates America250 by reviving fried apple pies

1 week ago

Taxpayers covering at least $300 million of Trump ballroom costs

1 week ago

“Most of that is basically Iranian propaganda”

1 week ago

x
x
x
x
x
x