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Fanboys think missing F-35 made it to Cuba

God knows where these morons got this idea but here we are: A number of MAGA Twitter users are pushing the theory that the Marine Corps' missing F-35 fighter jet somehow landed "safely" in Cuba, sans pilot or cockpit, because something something China has a base there something.

"I wouldn't worry about Lauren Boebert feeling up a dude in a theater, I would worry how an unmanned American F-35 landed safely in Havana Cuba…" writes Blue Check guy "Gunther Eagleman™" while "Real Mac Report" wrote "🚨Breaking: An unidentified F-35 fighter jet landed in Havana. The Cuban government has not released any information yet," and you get the picture.

The first Twitter match for anything with "F-35" and "Cuba" in it from the last 24 hours relevant to the current missing fighter jet comes from just one rando with 14 followers replying "Auto pilot compromised. F-35 turned south landed in….Chinese airbase in Cuba ?" to a tweet on the story.

So some idiot just idly speculating turns into a thing in MAGA world, a thing that, despite our admittedly very limited knowledge of military aviation and technology, is exceptionally fucking impressively stupid even by this crowd's standards. Imagining if somehow a jet flying over South Carolina was somehow "hacked," with the ChiComs immediately ejecting the pilot after remotely seizing control is like – alright maybe that's a cyber warfare warning shot or whatever, fine. But to fly the goddamned jet all the way to Cuba and land it safely is just really not possible to anyone and everyone with the most passing familiarity with fluid dynamics. You can't keep an aircraft stable without the cockpit and more importantly the hatch to stop the air friction from the forward motion as well as the lateral currents and – fuck these tinfoil/horse paste people are just so utterly hopeless.

In all seriousness, it's actually more plausible that an alien spacecraft tractor beamed the wayward F-35 into its undercarriage and took it home to study primitive Earth technology. But since that doesn't fit with the "Biden so weak on ChiComs" narrative, we get this bullshit instead.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

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