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- The nihilistic richest man in the world financing the political campaign of the malleable, sociopathic, self-absorbed leader of a major political Party sounds like the origin story of a comic book mercenary army.
- Bret Baier’s foul: the absolute shit show of an “interview” with Kamala Harris where his questions were so slanted, they were asked in italics. Baier’s failure, in conservative eyes: allowing Harris to accurately appear sane and intelligent. Baier’s embarrassment, however, was claiming that “they” showed the wrong clip, when literally any person who has done more than five hours of live television knows how to say, “Okay, we’ve got the wrong clip; we’ll get the right clip running shortly.” That was no accident, and he threw his crew under the bus.
- Prepare for the start of “Fentanyl in Halloween Candy” season, which feels like it’s nearly as long as the Christmas shopping season. The Fox hysteria will be turned to 11 this election year. And for the record, we’ll be putting ours in peanut butter cups this year.
- If you’re in a union–except the head-thumpers in some police unions who want immunity–and you’re even considering voting for a candidate who thinks union autoworkers have jobs so easy a “child [could] do it,” please remember one of the reasons unions were formed was to make sure children don’t do those kinds of jobs like they did before unions. And if you don’t think Republicans want children to do these jobs: they’ve already legalized it in Iowa.
- At this point in the election, it’s our job to vote early, but it’s our duty to encourage and facilitate in-person voting. Most undecided voters who are left won’t get mail-in ballots; you’ll have to get them to the polls. And Trump’s recent behavior is making more and more of their minds up, so we must capitalize on his descent.
- How can a man who called Jeffrey Epstein a “terrific guy” and earlier today said Harvey Weinstein was “schlonged” by the justice system lead the Party of pedophile conspiracist Marjorie Taylor Greene? Why isn’t she on the job protectin’ our children? Marge, you’re friends with Trump and Gaetz; open your eyes!If Donald Trump is too exhausted running for office while he’s only doing one interview a day, he clearly doesn’t have the stamina for a full-time job. His campaign is admitting he’s not up for the task.
- Trump wandering aimlessly around a stage for 39 minutes, avoiding interacting with voters while only talking to the comely female hired to serve him and endlessly praise him, is a metaphor for his term in office. We do not want a repeat.
- Baier’s “mistake” clip during the Harris interview was part of an ongoing conspiracy against the American people. Fox booked the “women’s town hall” and screened the audience and edited the tape to elicit favorable tape to use against Harris. That sounds like an in-kind contribution.
- Having worked at the Harrisburg Patriot-News for a time, when I see headlines starting with things like, “Harris PA rally attracts…” I instinctively want to caret in “burg.”
- The bus company that transported the audience to Trump’s Coachella rally last week reportedly didn’t return to pick people up after because they didn’t get paid and at least one driver was assaulted by the (ahem) peaceful MAGA crowd. Neither he nor his staff cared enough to make sure people got home safely. They cheered Trump; he got the glorification he needed; he left; he forgot about them. File this as another metaphor for Trump’s term.
- Donald Trump lowered the expectations of the office of the President to his subpar level, whereas every other occupant strove to attain the higher standard as previous office holders tried.
- Why does no one ever ask for a big, steaming mug of Hot Vanilla on a cold day?
- With Bob Woodward’s new book, the Harris camp should resurrect a sign of Trump’s contempt for Americans in an ad: “Don’t vote for a guy who told you this [insert clip of Trump saying the coronavirus is like a cold] while secretly telling a journalist this [Trump saying “This is deadly stuff” to Bob Woodward].”
- The original fast-food-loving president, Bill Clinton, is two months younger than Donald Trump, and his time in office ended two decades ago
- I’m still trying to figure out what part of the pride of home ownership includes rebuilding the entire chimney that’s falling over because the builder didn’t tie it to the house. Yay. (And no, don’t be silly: I’m not doing it myself.)
- Pretzels are the most versatile snack food. Yeah, sure, chips of various kinds have dips and toppings, but you can put pretzels in ice cream or cover them in chocolate. You can dunk them in mustard, cheese, or caramel. You can serve them dusted in cinnamon sugar or you can cover them in hot crab dip. They’re fat; they’re skinny. They’re straight sticks; they’re twisted… into pretzels. (One of them once tried to take out a president.) The humble pretzel can be served at every phase of a dinner, from cocktails to dessert. I salute you, Pretzel, for your delicious adaptability.
