Categories
Uncategorized

“Retired drug dealer” t-shirt only as effective as wearer’s discretion

“At approximately 3:00 AM on April 28, 2025, Officer John Glas conducted a traffic stop on an Uber driver on Massillon Road near Cates Drive. This wasn’t a routine stop. The night before, our dispatch center received a 911 text from a concerned Uber fare. The passenger reported that their driver had casually mentioned he had a false-bottom aerosol can in the vehicle containing methamphetamine.”

“Feeling understandably uneasy, the fare discreetly reached out for help using 911 text. The next night, Officer Glas spotted the same vehicle and conducted a traffic stop. Following an investigation, the following was located inside the car: A false-bottom aerosol can containing 24 grams of methamphetamine (that’s four times the bulk amount), 4 pills, A meth pipe, A digital scale, Packaging baggies, Cash, Three cell phones. The driver, a 47 year old Woodland Drive man (Robert Rose) from the City of Green, denied ownership of the aerosol can (as they always do).”

“Unfortunately for him, the can – and everything in it – was found right inside his vehicle. He was arrested and charged with: Drug Trafficking, Possession of Felony Drugs, Possession of Drug Paraphernalia. He was transported to jail. And, as if the situation couldn’t get any more ironic, the arrestee was wearing a T-shirt that said: ‘Retired Drug Dealer.’ As you’ll see in the body camera screenshot below, the shirt apparently didn’t get the memo,” says a Tuesday Facebook post from the Springfield Ohio Township Police Department, along with pics of the non-retiree.

If not for the shirt this article could’ve been about how the passenger – if they’re smart enough to complain to Uber – would almost certainly have gotten out of paying for the ride and likely credits for at least a few more for the hassle of being driven by this model Red State Caucasian entrepreneur.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Look, it feels like Iran has killed thousands of Americans

7 hours ago

Darwin awarded

9 hours ago

Crude oil up 8.65 percent, Dow futures down 534 points on spike

10 hours ago

“Sadly, there will likely be more before it ends”

12 hours ago

Some of you may die, but it’s a risk Trump is willing to take

13 hours ago

Three US troops KIA so far in region: Live update Sunday

19 hours ago

Former Iranian President Mahmoud Amhadinejad killed in strike

19 hours ago

Washington state AI’s “Spanish” option just English with an accent

20 hours ago

IDF celebrates pew-peweing middle manager

22 hours ago

Orange Ayatollah celebrates regular Ayatollah’s demise

1 day ago

Ayatollah confirmed dead: Israelis

2 days ago

Thank you for your attention to this matter

2 days ago

Israeli intel thinks Ayatollah dead

2 days ago

Presidential address canceled

2 days ago

Tulsi should probably delete this

2 days ago

“All I want is freedom for the people”

2 days ago

K$H greatly angered his Orange Messiah over Milan trip

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Demented old slob rants at Texas “energy” rally

2 days ago

Orange Baby freaks out at tech CEO’s refusal to supplicate to him

3 days ago

Islamabad claims 297 Taliban dead in so far in war

3 days ago

Fox News catches Energy Secretary drawing solar power

3 days ago

DHS announces plan to build gulags in flood-prone areas

3 days ago

Marketing wizard commands his thrall to rebrand their vaporware

3 days ago

Fat Hitler claims he’s “exonerated,” wants to “take over” Cuba, etc

3 days ago

NOS-huffing maniac wanted in Pennsylvania for torching house to kill phantom spider swarm cuffed by NYPD after crashing U-Haul

3 days ago

NASA adds a second Artemis Lunar test mission

3 days ago

Suppose it was only a matter of time…

3 days ago

Colombian pro-Trump party lawmaker’s son finally deported

3 days ago

Mike Johnson says Republican’s health situation may be “terminal”

3 days ago

Cabinet secretary’s wife says Trump “too cozy” with commie tyrant

3 days ago

House schedules grueling two-day workweek in DC

3 days ago

Wholesale price index crushes expectations in January

3 days ago

Ivanka’s backup somehow significantly more unqualified for job

3 days ago

Heartbroken Florida man wasn’t suicidal, just kinda stuck in mud

3 days ago

Palestinians overtake Israelis on American sympathies: Gallup poll

3 days ago

Huckabee tells Americans to GTFO of Israel

3 days ago

US laser shoots down US drone on US soil

3 days ago

Pakistani jets bomb Kabul

3 days ago

Byron Donalds disagrees with Stitt fact-checking MAGA bullshit

3 days ago

Indiana school bus driver manages incredible four year streak of drinking on the job without getting caught and immediately fired

3 days ago

Netflix capitulates in WB bidding war

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Hillary unbowed by Comer’s dumbassery

3 days ago

Stephen Miller “repelled” by Noem-Lewandowski affair: book

3 days ago

Tampa International Airport’s Crocs ban sadly just a joke

4 days ago

Zohran comes out victorious again

4 days ago

Convicted attempted murderer accused of succeeding on cellmate

4 days ago

Trump kayfabes a world where he obeys court orders

4 days ago

Surreptitious shot, consequential chaser

4 days ago

New Doritos Protein to boost Doritos eaters’ athletic edge

4 days ago

Orange God Emperor hears out “Stop the Steal” assclowns’ plan for him to declare “national election emergency” ahead of midterms

4 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x