Nerdy sleuth Velma, one of the denizens of the Mystery Machine from the Scooby Doo franchise, will explicitly be portrayed as a lesbian who has a crush on a guest character in the upcoming Halloween feature “Trick or Treat Scooby Doo!” It will surely cause heartache in Right Wing World, even though Velma has been a lesbian icon for decades. Soon, however, conservatives will whine about the portrayal of a lesbian in a cartoon about a dog that talks to teenagers–albeit with a pretty severe speech impediment.