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Texas-style shootout on MAGA Twitter

An annoying nesting doll of quote tweets on Tuesday requires us to copy and paste their text rather than embedding them, but it’s worth the mess as it turns into a shitposting fight between Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton and his state’s senior US Senator John Cornhole Cornyn.

“The senate just pulled an all nighter and officially passed their $95B foreign aid bill for Ukraine, Israel, and Taiwan with nothing for the southern border. The final vote was 70-29 with 22 Republicans voting yes,” tweeted assclown MAGA influencer Greg Price, listing Cornyn among the yes voters, adding “It’s the most US government thing ever that the senate worked all night long… to pass a bill funding war all over the world and passed it while most people are asleep.”

Minutes later, a different chode named Michael Quinn Sullivan quote-tweeted Price and wrote “While Texans slept, John Cornyn sent $95 billion to help other countries with their border problems. Question: when was the last time Cornyn stayed up all night fighting for our border?”

Then Paxton pasted that tweet with “This is a question all Texans should be asking. Unbelievable that John Cornyn would stay up all night to defend other countries borders, but not America.”

Finally the payoff: “Ken, your criminal defense lawyers are calling to suggest you spend less time pushing Russian propaganda and more time defending longstanding felony charges against you in Houston, as well as ongoing federal grand jury proceedings in San Antonio that will probably result in further criminal charges,” Cornhole Cornyn responded. And then all hell broke loose.

“You’re a pathetic neocon POS traitor to this country,” Catturd replied to Cornyn. “Wow. This is unbelievable. I would expect more from a US Senator,” wrote assclown Women for Trump founder Amy Kremer. “You really are a POS John…” chimed in other MAGA influencer “Gunther Eagleman™,” probably not his real name. “John, fuck off you fucking fuck. It’s not Russian Propaganda that 800,000 people crossed the border the past month. Fuck Ukraine. Fuck Israel. Fuck Taiwan. And fuck you,” wrote “✪ Evil Te𝕏an ✪,” definitely not his real name. Funny enough, none of them addressed Cornyn’s rip on Paxton for being a corrupt piece of shit however. You’d think they’d be all in on calling it “fake news” and a “witch hunt” what not like they did when Pax was impeached.

Not even Paxton himself wanted to go there. Probably a smart move, considering that “STFU Cornhole! My lawyers have been working their asses off to keep me informed about which witnesses have been talking to the US Attorney’s office and the grand jury so I know who to retaliate against! We’re always five moves ahead of the FBI too, bro” wouldn’t be such a great flex.

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