Categories
Uncategorized

Texas-style shootout on MAGA Twitter

An annoying nesting doll of quote tweets on Tuesday requires us to copy and paste their text rather than embedding them, but it’s worth the mess as it turns into a shitposting fight between Picasso-faced Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton and his state’s senior US Senator John Cornhole Cornyn.

“The senate just pulled an all nighter and officially passed their $95B foreign aid bill for Ukraine, Israel, and Taiwan with nothing for the southern border. The final vote was 70-29 with 22 Republicans voting yes,” tweeted assclown MAGA influencer Greg Price, listing Cornyn among the yes voters, adding “It’s the most US government thing ever that the senate worked all night long… to pass a bill funding war all over the world and passed it while most people are asleep.”

Minutes later, a different chode named Michael Quinn Sullivan quote-tweeted Price and wrote “While Texans slept, John Cornyn sent $95 billion to help other countries with their border problems. Question: when was the last time Cornyn stayed up all night fighting for our border?”

Then Paxton pasted that tweet with “This is a question all Texans should be asking. Unbelievable that John Cornyn would stay up all night to defend other countries borders, but not America.”

Finally the payoff: “Ken, your criminal defense lawyers are calling to suggest you spend less time pushing Russian propaganda and more time defending longstanding felony charges against you in Houston, as well as ongoing federal grand jury proceedings in San Antonio that will probably result in further criminal charges,” Cornhole Cornyn responded. And then all hell broke loose.

“You’re a pathetic neocon POS traitor to this country,” Catturd replied to Cornyn. “Wow. This is unbelievable. I would expect more from a US Senator,” wrote assclown Women for Trump founder Amy Kremer. “You really are a POS John…” chimed in other MAGA influencer “Gunther Eagleman™,” probably not his real name. “John, fuck off you fucking fuck. It’s not Russian Propaganda that 800,000 people crossed the border the past month. Fuck Ukraine. Fuck Israel. Fuck Taiwan. And fuck you,” wrote “✪ Evil Te𝕏an ✪,” definitely not his real name. Funny enough, none of them addressed Cornyn’s rip on Paxton for being a corrupt piece of shit however. You’d think they’d be all in on calling it “fake news” and a “witch hunt” what not like they did when Pax was impeached.

Not even Paxton himself wanted to go there. Probably a smart move, considering that “STFU Cornhole! My lawyers have been working their asses off to keep me informed about which witnesses have been talking to the US Attorney’s office and the grand jury so I know who to retaliate against! We’re always five moves ahead of the FBI too, bro” wouldn’t be such a great flex.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Texas GOP symbol non-symbolically pisses on convention floor

6 hours ago

WATCH LIVE: Kennedy Center Denazification underway

9 hours ago

Judge taps out of blocking White House UFC fight

9 hours ago

White House Axios Secretary Barak Ravid gives Trump-Iran update

10 hours ago

“Void” is catchier than “expunge”: Luna’s intra-cranial focus group

11 hours ago

Dan Sullivan banned from ballot in Alaska

12 hours ago

Orange Tyrant screams at Iranians for “leaking” to “fake news”

13 hours ago

Randy Fine laments Ammonites’ rejection of the Orange Yahweh

13 hours ago

K$H sics agents on Ohio voter rights organization

14 hours ago

“The aluminum chassis, while almost identical, has holes that are machined with a slightly different pattern”: Trump T1 necropsy

15 hours ago

Newsmax reports DOGE cutting gay trans fly breeding program

15 hours ago

Majority of Evangelicals oppose war in Iran: Reuters/Ipsos poll

16 hours ago

Kennedy Center puppet board seeks stay of Trump name removal

17 hours ago

Mediocre white guys slapfighting on Twitter again

18 hours ago

Regime plans lame duck “expunge” of Trump impeachments: WSJ

1 day ago

“President Donald Trump grew furious this week”

1 day ago

New York Post reports Nazi-curious degenerate unfit for office

1 day ago

Federal judge finds Ken Paxton sued ActBlue to retaliate against them for funding Dem campaigns to public office, tosses case

1 day ago

Mysterious “8647” crop circles appear on National Mall

1 day ago

Pasadena PD releases video of cop-on-cop “horseplay” shooting

1 day ago

Fannie Man already pushed aside at DNI

1 day ago

Colorado wildfire a lesson on not crashing a plane onto dry brush

1 day ago

TACO post drops like clockwork

1 day ago

Apex of masculine dominance falsely advertised as dancing during “tele-rally” in which he will only address audience via speakerphone

1 day ago

Lefty perennial NYC candidate acquitted in ICE gulag stunt

1 day ago

Jaydee to join The View next week

1 day ago

Ben Shapiro tweets diagram of his media career

1 day ago

Republican Indiana sheriff indicted for campaign sign fuckery

2 days ago

Tehran threatens Ketamine Brain’s Middle East assets

2 days ago

The fake news is Iran’s best defense: President on Fox News

2 days ago

Wholesale inflation beats expectations

2 days ago

Tired old huckster promises win that has eluded him for months

2 days ago

Fox News brings you inside Orange Caligula’s games arena

2 days ago

Dems 50 – GOP 40 on generic ballot: Emerson poll

2 days ago

Republicans demand FEC probe the other Dan Sullivan

2 days ago

John Solomon reports socialist warlord brazenly touting his crimes

2 days ago

No fewer than 22 doctors assigned to Trump at Walter Reed

2 days ago

US resumes bombing Iran

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Trump surrounded by adoring worshippers

2 days ago

Spartan should have gone to the hospital

2 days ago

Bear season again in Japan

4 days ago

White House celebrates Trump “control” instead of melting down

4 days ago

Knicks fans react to President Trump at Madison Square Garden

4 days ago

Johnson and Johnson and shitty “voter fraud” conspiracies

4 days ago

Federal judge nukes Regime’s $100,000 H1-B fee

4 days ago

President Two Weeks has some opinions on instant gratification

4 days ago

Biden’s screwworm crisis getting worse: Ag Secretary Rollins

4 days ago

Sam Bankrupt-Fried formally applies for Trump pardon

4 days ago

White House tired of media’s separation of powers “narrative”

5 days ago

Fanboy finds time to bitch about MSM coverage of gas prices

5 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x