Far right Ohioans are probably going to lose their shit in about 13 minutes as the state will be testing every one of its tornado sirens simultaneously at 9:50 AM EDT, the Cincinnati Enquirer reports.
Of course regular Ohioans not aware of the test will also get unnecessarily frightened, plus there’s a chance that by some freak occurrence – or maybe not that freak as three people were killed when several towns were hit with an EF3 just last week – an actual tornado could suddenly form and endanger those who think the sirens are simply being tested. But the best reactions will be from the “Jade Helm” crowd who will quickly run to grab their guns, suit up in their “1488” patch-covered body armor they bought from a company that advertises on the Post Millennial, and speed toward the source of the sound to confront the shadowy forces of FEMA, George Soros, and the Illuminati.