Categories
Uncategorized

Florida HVAC contractor’s cover blown

A covert HVAC contractor masquerading as a CIA agent found his cover blown on Wednesday when a Florida State Highway Patrol trooper saw he had activated the fake red and blue flashing lights mounted on his Ford F-150 and pulled him over on Wednesday, the Independent reports.

It’s not clear how long 61 year-old registered Republican Jorge Alberto Alfonso had been working undercover as a CIA agent or whether any actual personnel with the feared intelligence agency had been duped by the HVAC contractor, let alone ever even been in contact with him. The same goes for the US Diplomatic Security Service, Interpol, and the British MI-6 – agencies which Alfonso was found to be possessing various documents, patches, etc falsely identifying him as in service to.

The traffic stop, initiated after the trooper observed the lights on and a woman in the front passenger seat “waving her arms, appearing upset or distressed,” really went south for Alfonso when he “identified himself as a federal agent, providing a CIA Counter Terrorism Unit ID, a CIA emblem coin in a badge wallet, and an MI-6 [sic] ID,” according to the arrest report. Asked for his affiliation, Alfonso demonstrated the talent for deception and resistance to interrogation HVAC officials are known for, simply saying “federal.” The trooper then placed Alfonso under arrest.

A search of the vehicle at least a half-dozen firearms, assorted passports, including blank ones, federal agency badges, bulletproof vests, money, jewelry, and pills in unmarked bottles, according to the police report. Alfonso was booked on felony false personation of a law enforcement officer and misdemeanor possession of a controlled substance without a prescription. He hasn’t posted bond yet and remains in Collier County Jail pending a hearing on January 30th, unless maybe he uses his HVAC skills to find a duct wide enough for him to crawl out and escape from the joint.

Created by potrace 1.16, written by Peter Selinger 2001-2019

Oxycontin maker ODs on bankruptcy

14 minutes ago

President advertises his mastery at card game for first graders

4 hours ago

Spirit Airlines officially shuts down

5 hours ago

More than half of Daily Wire staff laid off

16 hours ago

Orange Allah anoints McConnell successor

17 hours ago

The Villages hosts their idiot: Live Video

20 hours ago

Fourteen IRGC troops dead from an “explosion of bomb remnants”

21 hours ago

Pew pollsters pew-pew presidential-proval

22 hours ago

WATCH LIVE-ish: Grandpa rambles to reporters aimlessly

23 hours ago

Camp Mystic not reopening this summer

1 day ago

The Spirit of ’26: WSJ reports airline dead after Trump rug pull

1 day ago

Self-backed into a corner, Buddy Carter blames gas prices on Dems

1 day ago

Louisiana Dem sues to block Landry gerrymander speedrun

1 day ago

Whistleblower says what you already guessed about SPLC case

1 day ago

“Lib terrorists did it” trending in unfurnished basements nationwide

1 day ago

Iranians digging into missile reserves more literally than you think

1 day ago

Kemp not trying to redraw Georgia map before November

1 day ago

RonAnon encourages fans to make their vote count in mentally ill colleague’s non-binding Twitter poll that bots can click yes on

1 day ago

Todd Blanche dusted off “8647” case to earn formal AG nod

1 day ago

FEMA rehires 14 signatories of “Katrina declaration”

1 day ago

Scott Jennings snaps “get your fucking hand out of my face”

2 days ago

DOGEcels exposed healthcare providers’ Social Security numbers

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Faithful disciples surround Orange Jesus with love

2 days ago

Stereotypical boomer hell bent on pulling the ladder up behind him

2 days ago

White collar criminal brimming with tiresome personal insecurities

2 days ago

Large animatronic dinosaur fire claims large animatronic dinosaur

2 days ago

Orange Felon pulls plug on shitbrained quack surgeon general pick

2 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Drunken Fox News washout suffers more indignities

2 days ago

Big Rotisserie subverts democracy

2 days ago

President declares the American people “angry” with “seriously unfunny” Jimmy Kimmel, stresses urgency for ABC to fire him

2 days ago

Maine Gov Janet Mills drops Senate campaign

2 days ago

Steve Scalise’s gas price narrative could use some work

2 days ago

Scientology rages at Xenu cultists “speedrunning” into sanctums

2 days ago

White House ballroom approval stuck at 28 percent: poll

2 days ago

Fox News reports foreign disinformation campaigns bad for public

3 days ago

LIV Golf to be sawed up into tiny pieces

3 days ago

Powell to stay on Fed Board until he decides to quit

3 days ago

Galactic space commander fetes lowly underlings: Watch Live

3 days ago

Superman: The Ride suffers diminution and leveling of breakdown

3 days ago

Orange Sun Tzu says his Iran naval blockade better than bombing

3 days ago

Jim Jordan wrestles with being informed in real time that he just admitted Comey case is politically-motivated retribution

3 days ago

Luna, Hageman, and Biggs sink House GOP voting agenda

3 days ago

Supreme Court rules 6-3 for MAGA in racial redistricting case

3 days ago

WATCH LIVE: Sub-competent dipshit Pete Hegseth vs Congress

3 days ago

House Oversight says Bondi to testify next month

3 days ago

“The most powerful person to ever live”

3 days ago

Fuck your feelings statistical data that contradicts my feelings

3 days ago

No perp walk expected for Comey

3 days ago

Indiana Dem arrested for Don Jr style campaigning

3 days ago

Mental child evidently threatening mass shooting in Iran

3 days ago

x
x
x
x
x
x