God, the all-powerful deity, creator of the Heavens and Earth, unleashed His wrath upon Gaylord, Michigan on Friday, punishing the small town in the northern part of the lower peninsula with for its name promoting a sinful, un-Christian lifestyle with an EF3 tornado, the AP reports. It is unclear if God was angered by the town’s name violating his sacred “Don’t Say Gay” commandment and it were populated by Sodomites or if He construed the name as an insult and that the founders of the town were calling him a “gay Lord”. Either way the tornado ripped through the town, leaving two dead and dozens injured by His wrath. No word yet if local officials are exploring a name change, but “Repentanceville” or “Heteroberg” should be considered.
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